Recovery Daily Podcast

When I was younger, I was constantly daydreaming. These whimsical moments of a wondering mind were seen as wasteful—especially in eleventh grade history class. But wouldn’t it be something if we could recapture that ability to escape into a mental space of positivity and relaxation as an adult? I wonder if I’d been encouraged, “yes, Rachel just travel for a while inside your head and see where you...

Before working through the steps of my sobriety program, my happiness was tied to unhealthy conditions. I even made my early sobriety dependent on conditions. Relationships became my source of self-approval, yet fear tainted all of them. I’ve since learned that happiness is an inside job. Sober me, Rachel version 2.0, had to get to know myself, my likes and dislikes, and learn how to love and list...

I'm grateful to have the opportunity to explore new hobbies while living in stroke recovery. My husband encouraged me to try everything and find what I enjoy that doesn’t trigger my head pain. One hobby I’ve embraced is painting, particularly upcycling pill bottles—an unfortunate waste from my recovery—into something beautiful. I decided to paint scenes I’d like to see since traveling is no longer...

Have you ever walked into a room and felt completely out of place? That feeling is what we call ‘comparing out’, focusing on all the ways you’re different from everyone else. On the flip side, there are moments when you step into a room and immediately think, “Ah yes, these are my people.” That’s ‘relating in.’ When I first attended sobriety meetings, I couldn’t help but notice how much older ever...

I woke up this morning with terrible self-talk. My inner voice that lies to me was telling me I don’t deserve to be happy. It was saying that I deserve my chronic pain, my disability, and my alcoholism. I rarely wake with such negativity. I logged in to my morning sobriety meeting, and after 30 minutes, I heard someone say, “I’m worth it.” I also heard, “Am I listening?”  I certainly was listening...

To say my life was unmanageable before I got sober is an understatement. I stopped paying bills, going to work, and even getting out of bed. Mornings were a blur of throwing up and drinking wine just to keep something down. (Sorry for the visual.) When I reflect on what it truly means to admit that life is unmanageable, I realize now that for me, unmanageable meant impossible. I was faced with a c...

I told my husband when I started my podcast that if my pain could help even one person, I would have achieved what I set out to do. With every message I receive from listeners in recovery—whether from alcoholism, stroke, or mental health challenges—he reminds me, "You’ve reached your goal again." (I know, he’s adorable!) It’s important for me to always remember my purpose. It keeps me motivated an...

Today I listened to an amazing new type of music for meditation. Its native American flute music by R. Carlos Nakai. The album is called “Earth Spirit.” It made me feel like I was in a massage studio awaiting my massage therapy to begin. I was listening because I needed an alternative to yoga today. I’m super sore but didn’t want to skip getting my mat out today for fear that it would break the ha...

When I was a kid, we didn’t run to the doctor at every sneeze, fever, or vomit. We “rubbed some dirt on it and walked it off.” In fact, as a teen I crawled to the phone to ask my grammy what could be wrong with me because my stomach hurt too bad to walk. She said I might have appendicitis, and I needed to go to the hospital which I promptly did with my sissy.  I laugh at these memories now, but at...

My sobriety was unstable in the beginning—the time between putting down a drink and getting exposed to stories from other recovering alcoholics that helped me understand the pain underneath the alcoholism. It was during this time that I relapsed after my first stint at INOVA CATS detox facility. I wasn’t drinking to numb the pain, yet I didn’t yet understand the value of the pain. Emotional sobrie...

Unfortunately, I did well in school by putting forth minimum effort. When I reached Calculus 5 as a senior in college, minimum work didn’t cut it. I think I failed every test and quiz in that class. All I remember of that class was being drunk. Toward the end of the semester my professor asked me if I was SUPPOSED to graduate the following month. I said yes, and she gave me a D—I didn’t earn that...

I’ve looked up the definition of spirituality a zillion times since I stopped drinking. Depending on where I looked, there were various meanings of the word. I emphasize the difference between spirituality and religion in my life because spirituality specifically opened the door to both my physical and emotional sobriety. My favorite definition of spirituality involves connection with others, the...

Who do you talk to when you are disturbed? I learned as I got older to shut down—keep my inner disturbances to myself. I think that comes from not receiving reactions from others that I hoped or expected, ya know? Eventually, I just stopped talking about the real difficult stuff and drank over it instead. I became so self-centered on my own pain that I couldn’t see anyone else’s. I couldn’t be the...

When things are going my way, I have a false sense of power or control over my life, people, places, and things. When things don’t go according to my plan, I recognize the complete lack of control I have. Since my stroke I’ve had so much fear that I can’t seem to shake—what does my future hold, and how can I live without that handle I had on my life? I have been working on a concept that my psychi...

I’m officially a nerd and over achiever! I’ve written my personal plan for the second year in a row. And we thought I was just sucking up to my bosses all those years—turns out I DO love writing strategies and implementation plans! So, what’s on the docket for 2025? I have a few exciting adventures that align with my mission to inspire and connect with others in recovery. This year, I’ll focus on...

This morning, I woke up hangover-free—something that used to be unimaginable for me on New Year’s Day. Not drinking is the most important part of my life because it keeps everything I have intact. Last night, I celebrated quietly, painting in my studio while fireworks exploded outside. I finished a love-inspired piece for my new Etsy shop and started a new “pill bottle painting” (more to come on t...

“When something disturbs me, there’s something wrong with me.” This concept was introduced to me in my sobriety program, and I constantly challenge it. My first thought is usually, “No, something is wrong with the jackwagon who made me feel this way.” But the truth is, my disturbed, irrational thinking is often the result of me not dealing with something within myself. If I don’t address it, by ca...

This morning, I woke up to my 6:45am alarm and thought, “Maybe if I don’t move, Autumn and Boris will go back to sleep. I don’t need to go to my 7:00am sobriety meeting.” I moved the covers off me and thought, “I need my meeting.” I took the pooches out for their morning potty and fed them while thinking, “If I set my alarm for 7:45am instead of 6:45am, I can get an extra hour of sleep and go to a...

Having a stroke at age 46 thrusted me into fundamental thinking about my existence, values, and my purpose. I’m forever grateful that I had a strong sobriety program based on simple principles that guide my behavior and my thinking. What my program has done for me is remove the alcohol to enable rational and critical thinking to handle life on life’s terms, not my own. I’d be lying if I said I’ve...

Before my medical retirement, I was a Marketing Director for a super groovy company. I was heartbroken to walk away due to my disability. One of the things I loved most about my job was inspiring others to take pride in their work and feel good about where they worked. In a way, I was helping people see the best in themselves. After all, if you can’t enjoy your time at work, how can you create a p...

I’m listening to a book called The Untethered Soul-The Journey Beyond Yourself. So far, I’m really diggin’ the perspective on the conversations we have with ourselves inside our heads. I have an incredible ability to listen to that voice inside my head and believe everything she says, even when she’s saying I’m a failure. She’s a big fat liar and for some reason I listen to her. In fact, the voice...

For years, I spent Christmas mourning the holidays of my childhood. Grammy and Grandpop's Christmas Day feast was a warm, loving tradition I could rely on—until it ended, as all things inevitably do. Clinging to those memories, I sabotaged my own holidays, drinking mimosas in the morning and boxed wine all day. Sobriety taught me that while I can cherish the beautiful memories of my past, I have a...

I read an inspiring story this morning about a woman, born blind, struggling to accept her handicap and turned to alcohol. It wasn’t until she was able to finally accept her handicap that she became open to help. She connected with others like her and before long was running her own business. It’s amazing how our potential depends on our mindset. My self-pity and lack of acceptance seems to live s...

I was talking to a friend today about life changing hard stuff he’s dealing with, and he responded, “at least I have the program.” Wow! It immediately pulled me back to when I experienced the same hard stuff in my life as an active alcoholic. Back then it felt like there were no seasons, and my life was just one long cold, dark winter. How fortunate I am to no longer be chasing that euphoric feeli...

Listening to someone when you think they’re wrong takes an incredible amount of self-control. But here’s the fascinating part—when I shut up, don’t interrupt, and actually listen, sometimes they’re right. I’ve always struggled to let people finish their sentences, especially when I feel like I can save them the effort by ‘course-correcting’ mid-sentence. I used to excuse myself with a laugh, sayin...