A Day at a Time Reflections

Once in a great while, I find myself thinking that perhaps things weren't quite so bad as they seemed to be. At such moments, I force myself to realize that my illness is talking to me, trying to tempt me into denying that I am, in fact, afflicted with an illness. One of the key action steps of the Gamblers Anonymous Program is that we give our illness to God as we understand Him, accepting our po...

The Gamblers Anonymous Program teaches us that we have an incurable illness. We always get worse, never better. But we're fortunate in that our incurable illness can be arrested, one day at a time, as long as we don't place that first bet. High-toned academic research and ivory-tower studies to the contrary, we know from experience that we can no more control our gambling than we can control the o...

The longer I'm in Gamblers Anonymous, the more important becomes the slogan, "First Things First." I used to believe that my family came first, that my home life came first, that my job came first. But I know today, in the depths of my heart, that if I can't stay clean, I'll have nothing. "First Things First," to me, means that everything in my life depends on my refraining from gambling. Am I gra...

Placing one last bet will never again be for me simply killing a few minutes and leaving a nickel for the bookmaker. In exchange for the first bet, what I'd plunk down now would be my bank account, my family, our home, our car, my job, my sanity, and probably my life. It's too big a price, and too great a risk. Do you remember your last bet? Today I Pray … May I be strong in the knowledge that God...

In the old days, we often had such devastating experiences that we fervently swore, "Never again." We were absolutely sincere in those moments of desperation. Yet, despite our intentions, the outcome was inevitably the same. Eventually, the memory of our suffering faded, as did the memory of our "pledge." So we did it again, ending up in even worse shape than when we had last "sworn off." Forever...

"Lead us not into temptation," we pray, for we know with certainty that temptation lurks around the corner. Temptation is cunning, baffling, powerful and patient; we never know when it will catch us with our guard down. Temptation could come in the siren song of a four-color advertisement or a radio commercial, the neon and noise of a casino, or, more obviously, in the direct urgings of another pe...

Gamblers Anonymous teaches us that we are emotionally and mentally different from our fellows. We are reminded that the great obsession of every compulsive gambler is to prove that somehow, someday, we will be able to control our gambling. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing, and many pursue it to the gates of prison, insanity, or death. Have I conceded to my inner self that one bet is...

There have been days during my recovery when just about everything seemed bleak and even hopeless. I allowed myself to become depressed and angry. I see now that it doesn't matter what I think, and it doesn't matter how I feel. It's what I do that counts. So when I become anxious or upset, I try to stay in recovery by going to meetings, participating, and working with others in the Gamblers Anonym...

One thing that keeps me on the right track today is a feeling of loyalty to other members of Gamblers Anonymous, no matter where they may be. We depend on each other. I know, for example, that I'd be letting them down if I ever gambled. When I came to GA, I found a group of people who were not only helping each other to stay clean, but who were loyal to each other by staying clean themselves. Am I...

All my life, I looked to others for comfort, security, and all the other things that add up to what I now call serenity. But I've come to realize that I was always looking in the wrong place. The source of serenity is not outside, but within myself. The kingdom is within me, and I already have the key. All I have to do is to be willing to use it. Am I using the tools of the Gamblers Anonymous Prog...

If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we'll find at the root of it some unhealthy dependency and its consequent unhealthy demand. So let us, with God's help, continually surrender these crippling liabilities. Then we can be set free to live and love. We may then be able to Twelfth Step ourselves, as well as others, into emotional well being. Do I try to carry the message of the...

Since I came to Gamblers Anonymous, I've begun to recognize my previous inability to form a true partnership with another person. It seems that my egomania created two disastrous pitfalls. Either I insisted upon dominating the people I knew, or I depended on them far too much. My friends in the Program have taught me that my dependence meant demand-a demand for the possession and control of the pe...

"We must be true inside, true to ourselves, before we know a truth that is outside us... We make ourselves true inside by manifesting the truth as we see it," wrote Thomas Merton in No Man Is An Island. Since much of my recovery is based on spiritual progress, it is essential that I start by creating within me a small area of absolute truth and love where God can become rooted. As I expand that ar...

We learn in Gamblers Anonymous that, as we grow spiritually, we find that our old attitudes toward our instinctual drives need to undergo drastic revisions. Our demands for emotional security and wealth, for personal prestige and power, all have to be tempered and redirected. We learn that the full satisfaction of these demands cannot be the sole end and aim of our lives. But when we're willing to...

Merely changing my behavior, and what I say and do, doesn't prove there's been a change in my actual inner attitude. I'm deceiving myself if I believe I can somehow completely disguise my true feelings. They'll somehow come through, prolonging the difficulties in my relationships with others. I have to avoid half-measures in getting rid of the troublesome emotions I've been trying to hide. Have I...

STEP 3 - Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of this Power of our own understanding. We are powerless over gambling - our lives became completely unmanageable, then in Step Two we found that help was available. Ask yourself if you want help and you will realize that you certainly need help or you would not have come to Gamblers Anonymous. If you are going to arrest this...

It's time for me to realize that my attitude - toward the life I'm living and the people in it - can have a tangible, measurable, and profound effect on what happens to me day by day. If I expect good, then good will surely come to me. And if I try each day to base my attitude and point of view on a sound spiritual foundation, I know it will change all the circumstances of my life for the better,...

There is no advantage, no profit, and certainly no growth when I deceive myself merely to escape the consequences of my own mistakes. When I realize this, I know I'll be making progress. "We must be true inside, true to ourselves, before we can know a truth that is outside us," wrote Thomas Merton in No Man Is an Island. "But we make ourselves true inside by manifesting the truth as we see it." Am...

Before I became clean in Gamblers Anonymous, I blamed all my problems on other people, or on places and things. Now I'm learning to look squarely at each difficulty, not seeking whom to "blame," but to discover how my attitude helped create my problem or aggravate it. I must also learn to face the consequences of my own actions and words, and to correct myself when I'm wrong. Do I practice the Ten...

  We may not know any specifics about the activities of today; we may not know whether we'll be alone or with others. We may feel the day contains too much time-or not enough. We may be facing tasks we're eager to complete, or tasks we've been resisting. Though the details of each person's day differ, each day holds one similarity for us all; each of us has the opportunity to choose to think posit...

I've begun to understand myself better since I've come to Gamblers Anonymous. One of the most important things I've learned is that opinions aren't facts. Just because I feel that a thing is so doesn't necessarily make it so. "Men are not worried by things," wrote the Greek philosopher Epictetus, "but by their ideas about things. When we meet with difficulties, become anxious or troubled, let us n...

Why don't I spend part of today thinking about my assets, rather than my liabilities? Why not think about victories, instead of defeats-about the ways in which I am gentle and kind? It's always been my tendency to fall into a sort of cynical self-hypnosis, putting derogatory labels on practically everything I've done, said, or felt. Just for today, I'll spend a quiet half hour trying to gain a mor...

Now that we're free and no longer gambling, we have so much more control over our thinking. More than anything, we're able to alter our attitudes. Some members of Gamblers Anonymous, in fact, choose to think of the letters GA as an abbreviation for "Great Attitude." In the bad old days, I almost always responded to any optimistic or positive statement with, "Yes, but Today, in contrast, I'm learni...

We have learned from others in Gamblers Anonymous that the chief activator of our defects has been self-centered fear - mainly fear that we would lose something already possessed or that we would fail to get something we demanded. Living on the basis of unsatisfied demands, we obviously were in a state of continual disturbance and frustration. Therefore, we are taught, no peace will be ours unless...

If I live just one day at a time, I won't so quickly entertain fears of what might happen tomorrow. As long as I'm concentrating on today's activities, there won't be room in my mind for worrying. I'll try to fill every minute of this day with something good-seen, heard, or accomplished. Then, when the day is ended, I'll be able to look back on it with satisfaction, serenity, and gratitude. Do I s...