The Sex Addiction Podcast For High-achievers and Entrepreneurs

There’s this problem in the sex and porn addiction space… People treat it like a substance addiction, but it’s not. Recovering from a process addiction is very different from recovering from a chemical dependency on an external substance. In many ways, sex addicts are never recoverED. They will likely be in recovERY for the rest of their lives. Sex is a biological desire (so is physical attraction...

Sexual betrayal will turn your wife's world upside down. She will experience significant trauma for years after she discovers your sex addiction.  Intrusive thoughts, graphic images of you with other women, total body trauma responses… It’s hard for a betrayed partner to have a single day where she’s not triggered by something in her environment. While men cannot undo what has already been done, t...

We claim to value monogamy and committed relationships… but, do our actions line up with that? Desire and attraction are baked into our DNA. Nothing you can do will change that. So, what are you and your wife going to do about it? Sure, some behaviors are compulsive and not biologically necessary. But, many of these desires are quite natural. In this episode, I talk about something that isn’t talk...

Dan Drake is well known in the sex addiction space for his workbook that men and women use during the “Full Therapeutic Disclosure” process. A full therapeutic disclosure is a process where the cheating partner discloses a full history of their sexual behavior. The betrayed partner can choose what it is that they want to know and what they do NOT want to know. This episode will be different than m...

Your wife has the right to be mad about whatever she wants to be mad about. Comparing your acting out to another guy's acting out is irrelevant. The issue is the deception. Being married to a liar sucks. That’s what she's mad about. It’s the lack of trust that will torture your wife the most. If you are deep into recovery, you probably already know this. But, keep it in mind as you continue to hea...

All wives wish they could help their husbands feel the pain of being betrayed. Unfortunately, it can be very difficult to imagine the hurt that infidelity brings. In this episode, Vanessa Cardenas and I discuss “her experience” to help sex addicts better communicate during the painful phases of betrayal recovery. Vanessa is a relationship coach who has been personally affected by sexual betrayal....

Sobriety and Recovery are totally different things. Sobriety is protecting yourself from unwanted behavior. Recovery is getting to a place where you no longer need protection. To me, most men are working a sobriety plan, not a recovery plan. The focus is on NOT doing things rather than changing their brain. Remember, this is a process addiction. To truly recover, you need to change the thought pro...

Has your wife asked you the dreaded question: “Are you even in good recovery?” Geoff Steurer is one of the most well-known names in the sex addiction and infidelity space. His podcast is one of the top podcasts in the field.  In this episode, Geoff and I talk about the sex and porn addiction recovery process and how guys can gauge if they are actually “doing everything they can.” We also talk abou...

To overcome a sex addiction you need: Connection with like-minded men who you meet with consistently Accountability and a 24/7 support platform A group of men who you admire and look up to Here’s the problem… it’s hard to get all three recovery aspects listed above. This is sad… because the lack of all three is what often leads to relapse/divorce. In this episode, I outline what a perfect recovery...

Sex addiction is classified as a process addiction. Process addiction is very different from substance addiction as your thoughts have everything to do with how addicted you will become. What’s the cure… Self-Mastery. In this episode, Jeremy Lipkowitz and I discuss how we both use self-mastery practices in our own recovery and how other men can implement the same strategies in their recovery. Jere...

The sex addiction field is largely a copy-and-paste of substance addiction. While the sex/porn addiction field has made a lot of progress recently, a lot of work still needs to be done. Does abstinence-based treatment work when it comes to sex and porn addiction? The stats would suggest… NO. Sex addiction is very different from substance addiction. You do not need drugs and alcohol to survive. How...

Scott Cone and Chris Inman run a sex and porn addiction coaching program for Christian men.  In this episode, we discuss the aspect of Christianity as it pertains to sex addiction. We also talk about how sexual compulsivity forms in successful men and how they can craft a recovery program that works for them. All three of us have been personally affected by sex addiction and I think you will find...

Relapse is a dreaded word in the sex addiction world. If you're lucky, your wife will give you another chance. But, typically a second chance is all they will give you. Third or fourth chances are rare and much harder to come back from. But, relapses don't have to happen to you... as long as you can identify the processes that you are addicted to and remove them from your life. Sex and porn addict...

This episode takes a different approach compared to my usual format. I chose a question-and-answer style to give my guest the opportunity to address some of the more debated and controversial aspects of sex addiction. Graeme Daniels has a unique approach when it comes to the treatment of sex and porn addiction. His podcast and book use a psychoanalytic framework when examining the causes of sex ad...

Sex addiction seems to sneak up on people. But, what if you could stop it? What if you could feel it coming so early that you were able to prevent it from happening? Somatic Experiencing (SE) is a therapeutic approach that focuses on the nervous system's dysregulation and how it affects your life.  High-achievers and entrepreneurs tend to focus on progress rather than what is happening inside them...

Your wife isn't enough to keep you sober… Your kids aren't enough… even God isn’t enough. If they were enough, many of my clients would have been sober a long time ago. For high-achieving men, there seems to be one thing that wakes them up and makes sobriety last.  In this episode, Donald Zaksek and I discuss the unique challenges that successful men face when recovering from sex and porn addictio...

From ages 12-25, young men are sucked into a sexual world. The belief is formed that sex and women are a scarce commodity. This “scarcity” often causes men to pursue sex and women before their time runs out. It’s really an insane thought process if you stop and think about it. What is sex really going to do for these young men? Is life really going to be that much better when you have all of these...

Surrender... Every sex and porn addict has heard that word before. But, what does it mean? How do you do it? Why is it so important to surrender if you want to overcome sex addiction? This episode was fun to record as Debby has a refreshing take on sex addiction and sexual betrayal. Debby Wade is a CSAT (Certified Sex Addiction Therapist) who recently opened a retreat center in Montana for couples...

Sex addicts are typically people pleasers. Successful men are usually successful because of their ability to please others. The problem is that they tend to prioritize pleasing others over pleasing themselves. This leads to coping, compensating, and striving. The good news is that you can have both... Sobriety AND success. High-achievers are resourceful, driven, and creative. Sex addiction becomes...

Sex addiction is what is called a “process addiction,” meaning that the dopamine comes from thinking. If you want to beat this addiction, you need to change the way you think. Lara Dye (PhD and Certified Sex Addiction Therapist) and I discuss how to navigate a process addiction and what goes into changing how a sex addict thinks. High-achievers, business professionals, executives, and entrepreneur...

There’s an obsession with triggers in the sex addiction industry. But, it’s not that linear. Rarely is a trigger sexual. Yet, there’s this focus in the sex addiction industry on arousal templates and men being triggered by women/ sexual imagery. Sex addiction is classified as a process addiction. You should be looking for what triggers your process addiction rather than a sex or porn addiction. Th...

There is always a reason ‘why’ a sex addict becomes an addict. Understanding your ‘why’ makes sobriety easier to maintain. However, with sex addiction, there’s much more than just WHY you do it that makes sobriety challenging. In this video, Chris Groff (Certified Sex Addiction Therapist) and I talk about our experience working with business professionals, executives, and entrepreneurs who have de...

Sex and Porn Addiction is not about sex and pornography. It is all about the story attached to the behavior. Most sex addicts have no idea what these stories are. As a result, stopping these behaviors can be difficult as you are not aware of the root cause. In addition, your wife will likely want an explanation as to why you did the things you did. High-achievers have the drive to beat this addict...

Carol Juergensen Sheets is considered by many to be the "grandmother" of sex addiction. Her book, "Help Her Heal," is used by thousands of couples all over the world. Sex and porn addicts have a lot they need to do in the first 6 months after their wife discovers their unwanted sexual behavior. Violating your wife's trust is one of the worst things you can do in a relationship. Hiding, lying, gasl...

As a high-achiever and entrepreneur, I’ve always taken an issue with step 1 of the twelve steps: “We admitted we were powerless.” I believe this is one of the reasons why so many men struggle with their sobriety. Listen, you weren’t born with this sex addiction. You created it over time. And, you’re going to have to use your power to uncreate it. There’s a difference between knowing that you don’t...