Sex Advice for Seniors Podcast

This week’s fascinating guest is Dr. Eliot Justin, CEO and founder of FirmTech , a wearable tech company which has created an innovative cock ring, that provides men with information about their nocturnal erections, a leading indicator of vascular health. Did you know that a healthy man will have 3-5 nocturnal erections each night? And that erectile dysfunction is not just a later-in-life problem;...

Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later, and it happened this week. I found myself being targeted by a group of (I assume) Far Right, conservative men who took offence to my suggestion that excessive consumption of pornography could have negative effects on one's sex life. As one would expect, this rather unremarkable and self-evident observation triggered a barrage of abusive comments. Fortu...

We were delighted to have a very special guest on the show this week, Dr. Lauren Streicher MD, talking primarily about the research findings from the recently published ‘Kinsey Institute survey, executed in exclusive partnership with Cosmopolitan, in which a national demographically representative sample of 3,001 women in the U.S. ages 60 and up come clean about everything from their desire for se...

Avoiding pornography is nearly impossible nowadays, unlike in the past when it was only accessible in XXX cinemas or hidden behind the counter in seedy magazine shops. Today, it's readily available on your phone, laptop, and home computer, allowing you to find whatever you desire with just a few keystrokes. While there's a lot of discussion about how young people are learning about sex from pornog...

One of the most popular questions we have been asked is how do you keep sex alive in a long-term relationship? As Zoe says, when you’ve known someone for 150 years, and they are no longer mysterious, it’s common for sex to go out the window. And this is especially true if your bodies are no longer the shape they were when you met your partner, and your libido isn’t what it used to be either. But,...

If you’ve ever wondered what a sexologist actually does, you’re about to find out as co-host Zoe Kors explains her work as a sex and intimacy coach. While she explains that sometimes issues, such as a mismatched libido, may be relatively easy to solve (in some cases), in most cases, having better sex can mean overcoming shame, trauma or abuse. Better sex is usually about more than technique, but i...

This week, we share our personal experiences of some of the more bizarre perversions we have encountered in our lives and our attitude towards them. While not all perversions can be directly attributed to the widespread use of pornography, it is undoubtedly a contributing factor. Additionally, experiences from our youth, when our sexual template was being formed, may also play a part in how we exp...

This week, we confront the question of what happens when looking after our parents takes priority over looking after our intimate relationships with our partner. Five weeks ago, Zoe’s 94-year-old mother had a fall, which left her with fractured vertebrae. Until that time, she had been relatively independent, but her injury left her unable to look after herself, and, as a result, Zoe has been thrus...

In Zoe’s absence, I interviewed Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers, author of multiple books including Sex, God, & the Conservative Church – Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy . Her latest book is Shameless Parenting – Everything You Need to Raise Shame-free, Confident, Kids and Heal Your Shame Too! It’s almost impossible to separate shame from sex especially if you were brought up in a religious household...

One of the benefits of growing older, if you haven’t already tried it, is discovering kink. There’s no expiration date on exploring alternative lifestyles, if you’ve always been vanilla. In this week’s episode, Zoe shares her experience with visiting a ‘Dom’ stemming initially from her professional interest before turning personal. Unlike adult lifestyles such as swinging, BDSM rarely involves sex...

Last week I (Suzanne) was lucky enough to be invited to a party for Substackers, where I met Prof Paul Dolan who is a behavioural scientist and has his own Substack, where he examines the science behind happiness. This week he wrote a short piece about escaping narrative traps, which inspired this episode about relationships in later life. It’s easy if you’re a single woman (or man) seeking a rela...

This week’s episode was sparked by a man Suzanne met who enjoyed providing a running narrative while they were enjoying intimacy. Although not adverse to dirty talk, this stream of consciousness became distracting. Nevertheless, it helped to get the endorphins flowing, heightened the meeting, and provided the occasional sigh for a couple of days after as she recalled what they had done. Dirty talk...

This week’s episode was prompted by a phone-in question on an Irish radio station in which Suzanne recently appeared. The question was from a woman who had a higher sex drive than her (male) partner and was struggling to have her needs met in the relationship. We often hear from older men who report that their partner, who is typically menopausal or post-menopause, no longer has the same desire fo...

After Sam Evans, co-owner of sex toy and pleasure shop Jo Divine, wowed us with her knowledge of lubes, sex toys for girls and overcoming challenges brought on by menopause, we thought we’d ask her partner Paul to give us his thoughts on toys for older men, male sexual health issues and other stuff. I suspect when most people think of men’s sex toys, they immediately think of the Fleshlight, but m...

This week has been all about Suzanne’s night sweats, frequent need to pee and feeling generally miserable. Hello urinary tract infection. Ladies of a certain age and men too might want to consider some of the contributing causes, and it’s not all about wiping in the wrong direction. Someone else’s saliva may also make its way into the urethra which is even more likely if the person in question, co...

A bit out of the usual episode, this week we talk to psychotherapist Caroline Bobby who spent 10 years, from 2007 to 2017, ‘stroking naked men.’ She reflects on this period of her life, her motivation for engaging with men in this way and what occurred during those years. Sex work is laden with judgement, but Caroline’s experience of using psychotherapy and the power of touch, to open doors to int...

What do you do if you’re an older woman with a declining libido? If you’re Suzanne, you go to a swinging club to rev it up. While this may not be everyone’s idea of a good time, if you have an open mind and the ability to say ‘no’ when called for, it can be a fun way to spend a night and become aroused. In this episode, Suzanne shares her experience of going to a club, near Heathrow, with a playma...

Just a short while ago, the idea of older individuals dating, kissing, or engaging in sexual activities was considered quite gross. However, now it has become a topic of great interest in both the United States with the recent introduction on television of the Golden Bachelor, and in the United Kingdom with My Mum, Your Dad. The notable distinction between shows like Love Island and First Dates, w...

This is probably our most explicit episode yet, so you may want to listen to this one when you’re not at work. Can you talk about the penis when you don’t have one? Well, why not, we say? As two women who enjoy giving men oral sex, we ask how important is technique versus enthusiasm. We talk about the male pleasure zones, including the scrotum, the frenulum, the perineum and the prostate. And nipp...

What is consent, and how do you make sure that, when it comes to sexual intimacy, there’s mutual consent? Mostly, it’s black and white - yes means yes and no means no. But what happens if one or both people are not in complete control of their facilities? Could a yes be a no once the booze or drugs have worn off? Or what happens if you like your sex on the kinky side, how familiar are you with saf...

While Zoe is away at a yoga retreat, I thought it would be fun to hear from former co-host Peter about what life has been like since he moved to Sheffield. So, not so much sex from him, but a much happier-sounding Peter enjoying his new environment. While this podcast is dedicated to sex and sexual pleasure, Peter points out how much one’s living circumstances and personal happiness can help allev...

When it comes to sex toys, lube and stuff designed to enhance sexual pleasure, there’s no shortage of products from which to choose. But how can you ensure that what you’re using isn’t causing more harm than good? Samantha Evans co-founded the sex toy shop Jo Divine, and many of her customers are older. As a former nurse, she is used to discussing intimate issues, and she’s on a mission to remove...

Dating profiles. They’re a minefield of bad photos (typically, but not always, of men), half-truths and outright lies. But today’s episode is only partly about that because we’ve covered dating in the past, and we know that for many people, it’s a massive time suck that leads to nothing but disappointment. It doesn’t have to be, however, if you start off as you mean to go on. In this episode, we t...

One of the benefits of being an older, single person is to consider what type of future relationship you want (or not). Thanks to the apps like Feeld, where you can self-identify in so many ways, they provide their own glossary of terms, and you can decide whether or not monogamy is for you. Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) is becoming an increasingly popular choice amongst younger people, but there’s n...

Let’s clarify - we don’t “give” each other orgasms. That’s the topic of this week’s podcast, where we talk about why we need to step away from the shitty narrative that says it’s the responsibility of one sexual partner to give the other an orgasm. It doesn’t matter what your gender is; being told, “I’m going to give you the greatest orgasm you ever had” (or some variation) can feel like a lot of...