The Ascertainers

Send us Fan Mail Another one where we record two in one night--this one is number two (in more ways than one?). March Madness (a little late) Names Street games / Improvised bases Childhood injuries Newt's--where it all began RIP Fountain Valley--we need a new golf course The Last Radio Game? Machete guy Was Hi-Fi Kenny the original MyPi11ow guy? Kris Kristoferson Mac Davis Yet another refere...

Send us Fan Mail With local radios station 92KQRS changing formats, we are preparing for the demise of the Radio Game.  Probably a victory for our listeners, but Mark and Jim are taking it kind of hard (pun not intended). Medical Minute:  Colonoscopy Prep Mr Science RIP Leonard Nimoy KQRS format change Jim's buddy won a car on the old KQ Don't let the door hit you Howard Stern The positi...

Send us Fan Mail Typical mindless banter followed by a rare, important message to men.  We almost got to Dire Straits. Student of comedy Spring has sprung A message to potential guests Romper Room Newt's--Smashing Burgers Fish Tacos--Costanza-style International Sensations Errors & Omissions Real Genius review It All Begins With a Song (Documentary) Medical Minute--Jim's PSA on the P...

Send us Fan Mail We had an impromptu 5 person recording featuring Mark, Jim, Jim's wife Kris, son Alex and Daughter-in-Law Sara.  Ambitious topic of Comedy Movies meant we had to get to the topic in record time.  Fun episode--hope you enjoy. It all starts at Newt's Errors $ Omissions (including an error in real time) Radio Game ASMR defined Comedy Movies    Monty Python & the Holy Gr...

Send us Fan Mail Your boys took a field trip to go see Becoming Led Zeppelin at the theater and boy are our arms tired...   Jellybean strategies--a complete guide Errors & Omissions--Rock & Roll Hall of Fame edition Shout out previous guest, Charlie Newt's promo--NEW BURGER Pete Townsend Rough Mix Radio Game Becoming Led Zeppelin--two thumbs up Controversial take Contact us at:  TheAs...

Send us Fan Mail Today we are joined by OG listener and former guest, Charlie from the neighborhood.  You can tell he's more comfortable this time around and it was a fun one to record. Mark "lost" his notes Parking paddle Tyrone "Ty" Chee and other martial arts It's Take Your Kid to AC/DC Day Hibbing MN facts MN State High School Hockey Tournament Charlie commands th...

Send us Fan Mail This is one of those where it is the second episode recorded on the same night.  Traditionally these are a little loose.  This one is no exception. #1 podcast on Jim's block The Belt Ice fish trip weekend recap Mark's medical team--Dave and Lucas John Mayer--cool guy or dick? Music Theory 101:  AC/DC Mark's buddy, Eric "A combination of Conway Twitty and Ron Je...

Send us Fan Mail "We've been letting people down for 99 episodes!"      --Jim "It's all ball bearings these days"      --The guy from Ajax (a/k/a Gordon Liddy, a/k/a Irwin M. "Fletch" Fletcher) International sensation.  G'day Mate! MyShirt (it took us 2 years to develop...) Our origin story What you need to do your very own podcast Angel Heart sidebar Y...

Send us Fan Mail This one is another where we recorded two episodes in one night.  Since this is the second of the night, the language gets a little rough (earmuffs for sure).  Sorry, Mom.  Also, thanks for listening! Post-middle age AI proof Powered by Newt's home of the best burger in Apple Valley, MN Stand-up comedy trauma Do comedian's think they're funny? SNL current cast revie...

Send us Fan Mail Today's effort begins with a heavily edited story about Jim's rodent exploits.  It goes downhill from there. Powered by Newt's Kayla and Bob Shoutout Jenson Creative for our kick ass shirts Perfume ads and other lady stuff Errors and Omissions Radio Game "He really grew into his looks" The world's worst guess on who sang I Can See Clearly Now Merle Ha...

Send us Fan Mail Big week for The Ascertainers.  Your boys hit the town to attend a Bee Gee's tribute show and looked fabulous!  We also got our t-shirts in, so we feel more official. Not much of an update this week, other than (for a change) we both thought this was a pretty good episode--some laughs, some good-natured ribbing (phrasing), and of course, we break down our favorite Bee Gee&apo...

Send us Fan Mail Feeling a tad overconfident from our last couple of episodes, we leave home without a map, compass, or a clue as to where we're going.  And you get to listen to it.  ENJOY! What's another word for Thesaurus? Mouse alert Newt's--Lovely Burgers! Earth Wind and Fire--Seriously?? Errors & Omissions 3.2 beer explained Debbie Downer Political theory R.I.P Bob Uecker R...

Send us Fan Mail Recorded on New Year's Eve.  A masterclass in distraction. Newt's--Come for the Toast Points The Evil Knievel of Fish Tacos Pitcher Night Errors and Omissions Radio Game Beer Stories Reach us at TheAscertainers@gmail.com #Newt's

Send us Fan Mail So, we were planning on saving this one for Episode 100, but let's face it--there's a pretty good chance we don't make it that far....   We welcome half of big-time rock band feegee--the ones who do our theme song--Alex and Paul.  They did a great job, but somehow, Jim found the need to talk way too much.   The Ascertainers theme, live and unplugged Awkward Intros T...

Send us Fan Mail We kick off 2025's first episode with an array of sighs.  Seems about right. Daylight Savings Time: The days aren't the only thing getting longer--amiright? Pull tab blues Newt's--It's the place to be! Pat K shoutout SpaceX vs NASA Time Zones Radio Game Yacht Rock Documentary on MAX Christopher Cross Michael McDonald / Jimmy Fallon experiment Toto Session Man T...

Send us Fan Mail This one comes in a little hot at the start.  Possibly the grind of 92 weeks or so of Friday night recording sessions is taking its toll?  Nah, we got back on track quickly enough.  Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas/Happy Hannukah and has a Happy New Year!  Thanks for listening! Typhoid Mike Dave Foley Cameo  (check out link below) Errors and Omissions Newt's--Smash Burger...

Send us Fan Mail This one was recorded in a matinee session the day after Thanksgiving.  Hangovers were in play for two of the three involved.  Jim's brother, Jeff is our guest. Canned cranberry Scurvy Almost a sports podcast Shoutout Bill S Newt's has a new Burger called the Power Trip Morning Show Burger--go eat it! Radio Game After school stuff as kids Gilligan's Island Snacks Ca...

Send us Fan Mail We follow up the delightfully wholesome matinee episode with Jim's Mom with this s**t show of debauchery.  Right on brand and maybe a little over the line (which, by the way, is the brand) there are laughs to be enjoyed on this one.  Bon apetit. Fueled by red beer Old home week at Newt's Sweet Hot Chicken Sammy Errors and Omissions--tooth talk Bands that shuffled the lin...

Send us Fan Mail It's the beginning of the Holiday Season so we asked Jim's Mom, Ellie, if she'd like to join us and class up the joint a bit.  We'd like to have Mark's Mom on, but her agent is playing hardball.   Shout out Apple Valley License Bureau Age gaps Newt's--Jim goes rogue More George Washington tooth talk The Hands Story Thanksgiving favorites Radio Game Th...

Send us Fan Mail We got our years a little bit out of order, but this week is 1979 albums.  The fall off between 1979 and 80 is kind of the beginning of the end, so we need a new premise.  Some decent laughs on this one.  Enjoy--and thanks for listening You had ONE job Mccarthur Park Newt's Seriously Great Burgers Boat piss Bootleg wine Singer transitions Pink Floyd history lesson 1979 Albums...

Send us Fan Mail Here we go on a first of two recordings in one session.  We haven't done a double in a while, and next week you'll find out why.  Original plan was to talk 1979, but time got away, and we improvised. Bootleg/Pirate Radio Purple People Eaters Mark goes blue Let us salvage your week USA! Ta Daah! Newt's:  Contract discussions Rennaissance Fair Back to Newt's--Pul...

Send us Fan Mail We were overdue for a guest, so we invited neighbor Jeff from WI to come on and impart his wisdom on us.  We were going to talk about state stereotypes, but we wound up just shooting the breeze and learning a thing or two about MN's neighbor to the east.  We'll do music next time.   Special guest neighbor Jeff Nobody prepared Newt's--featuring Cory the Comedian All...

Send us Fan Mail Following up on the smashing success of our inaugural Mount Rushmore series, we explore 1978, which happens to be a very strong year for rock music. Jim forgets his dollar--again Mount Rushmore explained--again Another thanks to feegee for our original theme music Pat K's email  Eddie Money miss Newt's --Apple Valley Minnesota's premiere juicy burger, ice cold beer,...

Send us Fan Mail Instead of just talking about cool albums from a great year, 1977, Jim decides that we come up with a definitive top 4 each.  Mark did not understand the assignment, which is as entertaining as it is disappointing. Mark's red beer in his giant mug Vikings choke again Iceland's famous Penis Museum Newt's was HOPPING! Shoutout neighbor Amy Mark feels bad about hammeri...

Send us Fan Mail Look, they're not all first round picks. OK? --Allen Gamble to Terry Hoitz, The Other Guys It's not your fault Mark starts swearing Right in the breadbasket Newt's--Pull tab Winners! PUP list for curling is apparently a thing Radio Game--Newt's staff picks Headphone guy at the bar Another Shark Tank idea 1976 Rock Albums--Boston, Leftoverature, 2112, Hotel Cali...