Dr. Marie Murphy
Your Secret Is Safe With Me
Dr. Marie Murphy talks about infidelity and other challenging relationship situations from a non-judgmental perspective. She shares practical tools and advice from her own coaching practice to help you make changes in your love life, and interviews professionals with complementary expertise, such as family law attorneys, mediators, non-violent communication specialists, and more. In addition, Marie discusses the social and historical context of romantic relationships to provide perspective on our taken-for-granted assumptions about how relationships are supposed to be. To learn more, visit mar...
Author
Dr. Marie Murphy
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Podcast website
Latest episode
Jul 2, 2026
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Episodes
162. Becoming More Decisive 12.10.2023 35:38
Your time and energy are limited, and when you don't make decisions quickly and effectively, you're wasting both. Infidelity situations are often fraught with difficult decisions, and people have real trouble deciding what they want. Sometimes people think there's value in taking time to think things over. But is that actually objectively true? Dr. Marie Murphy is discussing how humans tend to s...
161. How Do I Know if I'm Being Reckless? 05.10.2023 30:48
The problem with dismissing your desires because of potentially reckless outcomes is not going to help you decide what you really want. If you are faced with wanting to make a decision about your infidelity and you're worried that it may lead to a reckless outcome, this episode is for you. Dr. Marie Murphy is helping you see your thoughts about your behavior being reckless, sharing why there is...
160. Cheating On Your Fiancé 28.09.2023 28:34
Why does cheating on your fiancé present a particularly complex situation? Of course, not everybody puts marriage and monogamy together, but if you're formally planning to marry someone and you're engaging in some sexual or romantic behavior that your fiancé wouldn't be happy to find out about, today's episode is for you. Discover the obvious and subtle reasons why cheating on your fiancé presen...
159. You Can't Eat the Whole Elephant at Once 21.09.2023 33:50
When you can break down your infidelity situation into individual worries, questions, hopes, decisions, and actions, you can start deciding what you want to do one piece at a time. However, when you're in an agitated state, breaking your experience down becomes incredibly challenging. Discover why you can't eat the elephant that is your infidelity situation in one bite. Dr. Marie Murphy is showi...
158. Forgiving Yourself & Forgiving Others 14.09.2023 38:02
This week's episode is all about learning how to forgive yourself when you fall short of your own expectations, and forgiving others when things don't work out the way you'd hoped or expected. Forgiveness in this form is powerful, especially when negotiating an infidelity situation. However, there are some nuances you need to be clear about before you start forgiving yourself or anyone else in you...
157. You Might Be an Asshole 07.09.2023 31:28
If you're in the midst of an infidelity situation, there are plenty of opportunities for you to think of yourself as an asshole. Humans tend to be terrified of the idea that other people won't like them, but they're particularly terrified that the people they love might think they're a total asshole. However, have you ever stopped and considered the possibility that you might be an asshole? Dr....
156. Nurturing a Long-Term Affair (Part 2) 31.08.2023 37:37
This week, Marie is going in-depth on the things for which you and your affair partner need to take collective responsibility, and the things your affair partner has to take sole responsibility for themselves. Discover the areas where you and your affair partner need to be on the same page. Learn about communication regarding what each party wants, and the significant issues that can arise from...
155. Nurturing a Long-Term Affair (Part 1) 24.08.2023 44:07
In any relationship, affair or otherwise, there are things you and your partner can deal with together, and there are some things that you or your partner can only address as individuals. Today, you need to consider that the best thing you can do for yourself and your affair relationship is to begin to take responsibility for what's happening on your side of the street. Tune in this week for par...
154. Being Your Own Steward 17.08.2023 31:47
It's common for people to believe that they themselves don't have the ultimate power to make decisions. Maybe they don't think they have permission to choose, they shouldn't want what they want, or they need to consider others before deciding. If this sounds familiar, it's time to start being your own steward. Are you assuming responsibility for what you're creating in your life and taking owner...
153. Your Questions Answered (Part 5) 10.08.2023 56:06
How can you remain friends after an intimate affair? Why do people cheat in the first place? How might the presence of children factor into your decision-making about leaving your relationship for your affair partner? Are you worried about the financial damage of leaving your marriage for your affair partner? Dr. Marie Murphy is answering these questions and more on today's show. Discover how to...
152. Seeing Your Ex-Affair Partner in Social Settings 03.08.2023 37:41
Dr. Marie Murphy is doing something new this week. She is explicitly calling someone out for their perspective on an infidelity-related topic in an otherwise generally entertaining newspaper column. In this case, it was an opinion about what to do if you see your ex-affair partner out in a social setting. Learn about the importance of dropping judgment when it comes to making decisions around yo...
151. Your Questions Answered (Part 4) 27.07.2023 41:11
Can you keep a long-term affair going alongside your marriage? What has to happen for this situation to work out? Do cheaters always get found out? What do you do when you decide you don't want to cheat anymore, but you can't seem to stop? These are just some of the questions addressed in today's show. Discover why it's possible to continue a long-term affair without ever getting caught. Learn h...
150. Your Questions Answered (Part 3) 20.07.2023 40:09
If you're concerned about justifying your decision to end the relationship, being honest without being cruel, the honesty of your affair partner, or feeling trapped in conflicting emotions, this episode is for you. Discover the truth about providing compelling reasons for the choices you make. Dr. Marie Murphy is addressing questions from both sides of an infidelity situation, highlighting the p...
149. Your Questions Answered (Part 2) 13.07.2023 29:06
If you find yourself in a situation where you feel you've made mistakes in your relationship and desire to end it but worry about how others will react to your decisions, if you have concerns or doubts about your sexuality as you age, or if you're struggling with the consequences of infidelity, Marie has you covered this week. Discover how to deal with wanting to leave your relationship, why you...
148. Your Questions Answered (Part 1) 06.07.2023 34:38
Whether you're struggling with your thoughts and expectations of your partner, avoiding looking at your thoughts about your situation, or grappling with other people's judgments about your infidelity, Marie has you covered. Dr. Marie Murphy is discussing everything you need to know about your thoughts and feelings, what you need to consider when it comes to other people's thoughts and feelings,...
147. You Can't Shame Yourself into Changing 29.06.2023 30:11
There is an idea floating around in the cultural fog that if you tell yourself you're doing something wrong or that doing a particular thing makes you a bad person, you'll be able to change. If you're applying this kind of logic to yourself in your infidelity situation with the hopes that it will help you make a decision or change your behavior, this episode is for you. Discover why you can't sh...
146. Loving Your Decisions 22.06.2023 36:19
One of the biggest themes Dr. Marie Murphy's clients struggle with when they come to her for help is making decisions. If you currently believe that there are right and wrong decisions regarding your infidelity situation, this episode is for you. You have the option of lovingly committing to decisions you have made or loving decisions before you make them. Dr. Marie Murphy is showing you some s...
145. Don't Wait to Get Caught 15.06.2023 32:17
Some people keep their infidelity situations going because they don't know what they want. They think being in this state of not knowing offers them some protection, as they haven't made the difficult decision yet. However, whether you know what you want or not, getting caught would probably be extremely unpleasant. Discover why Dr. Marie Murphy believes that while you might never get caught che...
144. Your One Wild and Precious Life 08.06.2023 32:41
As humans, we are part of the cosmos, something much vaster than ourselves, and our understanding of it is only partial. However, your infidelity situation could serve as a window into comprehending your one wild and precious life on a deeper level. Discover how understanding your infidelity on a deeper level can give you powerful insight into the human experience as a whole. Dr. Marie Murphy is...
143. Treating Your Infidelity Situation as a Life Project 01.06.2023 29:15
Are you viewing your infidelity as an unsolvable mystery, or are you ready to tackle it as a life project, an opportunity for resolution, and personal growth? Your perspective on the situation can greatly impact the outcome. Join us this week to explore new methods to confront and manage infidelity situations. Relationship expert, Dr. Marie Murphy, will provide insightful guidance on how to a...
142. Trying to Get Back to the Way a Relationship Used to Be 25.05.2023 31:24
Some individuals who engage in infidelity express a desire to recommit to their spouse or primary partner, longing for a return to the way things were in their relationship. They may feel tormented by their infidelity while yearning for the past, even though they have been dissatisfied with the relationship for some time. Understand why it is normal to struggle with leaving a relationship in whi...
141. Contentment That Isn't Dependent Upon a Relationship 18.05.2023 39:18
As a society, we have decided that if you aren't in a romantic relationship, you are alone. It's fine to prefer having a partner (or partners) over not having one. However, it's time to start creating that feeling of contentment for yourself without relying on a relationship in order to feel positive. Discover how to generate contentment without relying on a romantic partner to help you create i...
140. Loneliness 11.05.2023 30:38
When it comes to infidelity and loneliness, there are two distinct-but-related problems. One is that as humans, we don't like feeling lonely. The other is that people will go to pretty extreme lengths to avoid loneliness, like getting into or staying in relationships that they don't actually enjoy. Discover the role that loneliness might be playing in your infidelity situation. Dr. Marie Murphy...
139. Comparing Your Spouse to Your Affair Partner 04.05.2023 23:58
Comparison is a normal human behavior, especially if you're romantically involved with multiple people. There is a time and place to make comparisons, but are the comparisons you're making between your spouse and your affair partner (or between any two people in your life) helping you in any discernable way? Discover the problem with comparing your spouse to your affair partner. Dr. Marie Murphy...
138. Telling a New Partner About Your History with Infidelity 27.04.2023 44:57
You get to decide what you share about yourself with other people. If you're considering telling a new partner about your history with infidelity, make sure you're doing it for the right reasons. Dr. Marie Murphy is discussing the work you need to do with yourself before you start disclosing your past infidelity to someone you're dating, and how to see the end of a past relationship as something o...
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