Stuck Not Broken

Safety is the state where life feels workable. Not perfect, just manageable. It's the top of the ladder and the place we're all reaching for, so this episode is about what it actually feels like in your body, what it looks like on someone's face and in their voice, and what it really takes to get there. You'll also meet Courtney, whose story we follow throughout the states from here. 👉 New here?...

You're getting things done. Answering texts, making dinner, showing up. But underneath it you feel wired and flat at the same time, like you're watching your own life through a foot of glass. That's functional freeze: your gas and your brake pressed at once, and "functional" just means you're still getting through the day while it runs. In this episode I break down what freeze actually is, how it'...

Ever notice your thoughts get meaner when you feel bad, and softer when you feel good? That's not a coincidence, and it's not a flaw in you. "Story follows state" means the story in your head comes out of the state your body is in, not the other way around. Once you catch it happening in real time, a dark story starts to lose its grip. 👉 New here? Find your stuck state, and your starting place: h...

Ever notice your thoughts get meaner when you feel bad, and softer when you feel good? That's not a coincidence, and it's not a flaw in you. "Story follows state" means the story in your head comes out of the state your body is in, not the other way around. 👉 New here? Find your stuck state, and your starting place: https://www.stucknotbroken.com/stuck Or go straight to what's best for you: 👉 St...

You can't just decide to calm down, sorry to say. The Polyvagal Ladder is a simple metaphor for how your nervous system moves: safety at the top, fight-or-flight in the middle, shutdown at the bottom, one rung at a time. Once you can see which rung you're on, a lot of the reactions you've beaten yourself up over start to make sense, and stop feeling like proof that something's wrong with you. the...

You don't decide to beat your heart, take your next breath, or digest your lunch. Something else runs all of that, every second, without checking in with you. That's your autonomic nervous system. This episode breaks down what Polyvagal Theory is in plain language and how it questions the old "sympathetic vs. parasympathetic" idea. 👉 New here? Find your stuck state, and your starting place: https...

After seven years and nearly 300 episodes, I'm trying something I don't think anyone else is doing: giving you all of my Polyvagal Theory knowledge, directly. And free. Season 2 of the Stuck Not Broken podcast is different from the regular show. It's the full audiobook of my first book, Stuck Not Broken: Book 1 - Trauma & the Polyvagal Paradigm, read chapter by chapter, right here in the feed....

What if the stories you tell yourself about your worth, your past, and how you got here aren't the whole truth, and you're still the one holding the pen? This is Episode 1 of the Stuck Not Broken audiobook: Book 1 - Trauma & the Polyvagal Paradigm. We start by questioning the stories you have about yourself and open the possibility of a new one. 👉 New here? Find your stuck state, and your sta...

"That's bulls***." That was my honest first reaction, back in 2018, to the work I now build my entire career around. In this episode of the Stuck Not Broken audiobook, I invite you to challenge your paradigm: How I came to Polyvagal Theory, and nearly dismissed it What a paradigm is, and why you need a new one before the science can land The urge most of us feel to skip ahead to the fix, and why t...

What does it mean to be a "gentle rebel" — and how does creativity fit in? In this episode, I talk with Andy Mort of The Haven community about rebellion as openness rather than aggression, why highly sensitive people often need space and safety to access their creative voice, and how creativity is less about the finished product and more about the ongoing process of becoming yourself. We get into...

If you've ever sat down to meditate and felt like you were failing at it, this episode is for you. In this special episode, I read a section from my new book, Stuck Not Broken Book Three, on why most people are meditating wrong — and what to do instead. We'll get into: What meditation actually is through a nervous system lens Why "clearing your mind" misses the point entirely How rejecting the pre...

In this episode, Justin Sunseri sits down with Erick Cloward, host of the Stoic Coffee Break podcast, for a deep dive into the Stoic practice of Amor Fati, or "loving your fate." Learn how to connect ancient Stoic wisdom with modern nervous system science. Erick and Justin discuss how to use principles from Stoicism and Polyvagal Theory to practice self-regulation, manage anxiety, and build emotio...

The Polyvagal Theory has transformed how we understand the nervous system—but somewhere along the way, it became a wellness industry bandwagon. In this episode, I'm breaking down how a legitimate scientific framework got diluted into oversimplified soundbites, and why that matters for your actual healing. 🌸 Not sure which stuck state you're in? Recognize where you're at and join the free communit...

When your partner is in shutdown, you're not just watching it happen—you're in it too. This episode is for the partners who feel like they're losing their person, who don't understand what's happening, and who wonder if they're making it worse. In this episode, I break down: What shutdown actually looks like (and why it's not a choice) What you CAN'T control (and why that matters) 4 concrete ways...

EMDR is everywhere — but do you know what's actually helpful? Or if it is at all? EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) has become one of the most talked-about trauma treatments around. But most people — and, honestly, many therapists — reduce it to one image: a finger waving in someone's face. That shorthand is costing people clarity about what's actually working. In this episode,...

A paper co-authored by 39 scientists called the Polyvagal Theory "untenable" — and now psychology influencers are announcing the Theory is "dead." But is it? I'm Justin Sunseri, therapist and member of the Polyvagal Institute's Editorial Board. That means I review work for Polyvagal Theory accuracy. So let me actually look at the claims. In this episode, I break down Paul Grossman's paper "Why the...

Is your self-help routine actually making things worse? The self-help industry has one answer for everything: do more. More habits, more discipline, more effort. But for a nervous system that's already overwhelmed — stuck in sympathetic flight/fight, freeze overdrive, or dorsal shutdown — more doing can mean more frustration, more overwhelm, and more defeat. In this episode, I break down 5 common...

Stop forcing yourself to relive the most painful moments of your life before your body is ready to handle them. Traditional therapy often skips the most critical step — building the physiological capacity to actually process what comes up. Justin Sunseri breaks down why flooding your system with past trauma makes things worse, and what to do instead. 🌸 Not sure which stuck state you're in? Recogn...

Justin Sunseri dives deep into the paradox of meditation and anxiety. If you've ever felt that meditation or breathing exercises make you more anxious, you're not alone—and you're definitely not broken. Justin explains how your nervous system might be signaling for a different approach, especially for those who experience freeze dominance. 🌸 What You'll Learn: Why freeze types often need movement...

Does a mental health diagnosis explain why you are suffering, or does it just give your suffering a name? In this episode, I challenge the traditional way we look at mental health labels. While a diagnosis (like depression, anxiety, or ADHD) can be a helpful shorthand for professionals, it often becomes a trap for the person receiving it—convincing them they are "broken" rather than adapting to th...

What if I told you that your ability to practice Stoicism isn't just about willpower or mindset—but about the actual physiological state of your nervous system? In this episode, I dive deep into a profound quote from Epictetus that perfectly illustrates how our autonomic nervous system affects our capacity to respond wisely to life's challenges. Using the metaphor of water, light, and appearances,...

There's more to me than Polyvagal Theory—I'm also a dad. And sometimes the best lessons come from the most unexpected places... like watching my son walk barefoot in sandals through a cold, rainy parking lot. In this reflective episode, I share a simple family moment that reminded me: mindfulness looks different for everyone. When my son told me he loves feeling "the air flowing between his toes,"...

"That was a long time ago. I don't think it affects me anymore." Have you ever said this about something from your past? In this deeply personal episode, Justin shares his own recent experience of discovering how past trauma still lives in the body—even when we're not thinking about it. After a major spinal surgery in 1997, Justin thought he'd moved on. But when new back issues required x-rays nea...

A balloon floated down from the hotel ceiling. My son said, "Hit it back." I was sitting on a bench, quietly processing—reflecting on a loud, joyful Italian family reunion the night before, thinking about my upbringing, the conversations with my brothers, how my wife and I are raising our own kids. I wanted to stay in that quiet space. But then a wave of irritation hit me. And in that fraction of...

When your spouse is dysregulated, shut down, or lashing out in anger—what's really happening? And more importantly, what can YOU do about it? In this episode, I break down: ✓ The biological difference between being technically safe and *feeling* safe ✓ Why your partner may not identify you as a safety cue (even if you're trying) ✓ The "Polyvagal Ladder"—how shutdown → anger → safety actually works...