Sideways

This week we’re talking about the genius ways in which addicts can source their drugs of choice, hide them up from prying eyes, and generally give the impression that everything is fine when it patently isn’t. We also discuss how, if put to positive use, this imagination, tenacity, and creativity can turn lives around in the most remarkable ways. Martin discovers a kindred spirit in a much loved C...

This week we're talking about the dangers of attending the work Christmas party, especially for those in recovery. We consider some of the strategies you might want to adopt if refusing to attend isn't an option. We also have a disagreement over the gratitude lists and discuss a remarkable brush with celebrity. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.substack.com/ You...

This week we're talking about the tyranny of perfectionism, how some people wear it proudly like a badge of honour, and how it is really nothing of the sort. There are a few helpful tips if you're interested in getting your perfectionism under control. We also cover haircuts, disappointing holiday hotels,  and the strange things people force themselves to enjoy when they'd really ra...

This week we're discussing the reasons why we often find it hard to ask for help even when we desperately need it. We talk about how we're not the only one's who lose out when we suffer in silence too. In an unusually serious episode we still find time to cover a collection of chips,  the quality of tea in hotels, farmers markets, and middle class apples. https://www.grahamlandiwell...

This week we're talking about "the green-eyed monster" itself. We discuss the difference between jealousy and envy, which I still get confused about. We look at the different types of jealousy and the ways in which they might indicate either a deeper emotional disturbance or what they say about you rather than the person towards whom you feel jealous. If that weren't enough we...

This week we're talking about what we need to do in order to rebuild others' trust in us when we have done something that has hurt or disappointed them. We talk about a guy who took ignoring calls from an unrecognised number to a new level, debate what we’d put into room 101, and wonder whether a celebrity tribute act can be the cause of alcoholism. Mispronunciation, getting caught short...

This week we're talking about humility. What is it, how do we get it, and why does it matter. It's also our 100th episode so, as you can imagine, we were partying like you wouldn't believe. So much so in fact that we strayed into the area of hernias, our three favourite pigs, and a lot of other nonsense that we know you've come to expect. Thank you to all of you who listen. We...

This week we're talking about why funerals present such a lot of potential triggers for anyone in recovery. We also discuss experiences of being close enough to touch the Queen without actually doing so, ridiculously extravagant restaurants, the importance of making a death plan, and funeral music. Martin tells me what he definitely doesn't want on his funeral playlist, and I tell him ab...

This week, in response to a question we got from a listener, we're debating the difference between abstinence and recovery. Martin finds it difficult to show any sympathy for my particularly nasty head cold, I remember a time my ex-girlfriend confused Uri Geller with a famous cosmonaut, and Martin inadvertently comes up with a great band name for an REM tribute act. https://www.grahamlandiwel...

This week we're talking about whether it's possible to live a life without regret and, if not, can we make use of what seems to be such a destructive emotion? We also cover favourite sandwiches, selling off your football medals, Frank Sinatra, and we both go all multi-lingual, momentarily. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.substack.com/ You can email us at info@...

This week we're talking about what causes boredom and the terribly destructive things we sometimes have a tendency to do when we feel bored. In the course of the conversation, we touched on a range of topics including "The Young Ones",  queues at petrol stations, ramraiding bakeries, and wetting yourself. Don't miss it. It's not boring. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co....

This week we're talking about the way we use the word ego and what it takes to keep it under control. I urge Martin not to look into its Freudian roots and instead we discuss indoor shoes, reasons for getting caned at school, and scrap metal. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.substack.com/ You can email us at info@grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk Thanks again for listening...

This week we're talking about the things that make us cringe and why avoiding awkward situations might have negative consequences. Martin finds it hard to let go of my past mistakes and displays a distinct aversion to the sound of silence. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.substack.com/ You can email us at info@grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk Thanks again for listening, w...

This week we're talking about the difference it can make to overcoming mental health difficulties when you believe that you can. While trusting the process of change won't be enough on its own for most of us a belief that we are unchangeable will definitely block progress. I have a new box of pencils, and Martin celebrates the completion of a project. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co....

This week we're talking about why empathy is far more valuable than sympathy, and how the former creates connection while the latter tends to break it. Martin has another obituary for us, I wax lyrical about driving over a bridge, there's some fascinating talk about moccasins and foot spa's, and a predictable but appropriate addition to the Spotify playlist. https://www.grahamlandiw...

This week we're talking about the debilitating issue of sleeplessness. We discuss what causes the problem, how we have a tendency to perpetuate it in ourselves, and what we can do to address it. Martin has a new mic, we reminisce about a re-write of a classic children's storybook, and touch on the purpose of cheap lager. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.substac...

This week we're talking about trauma. Where it comes from, what it looks like, and how we might go about treating it. We also have a conversation about dead birds, an unfathomably large breakfast, and smoking weed in an immersive art exhibition. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.substack.com/ You can email us at info@grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk Thanks again for listen...

This week we're talking about assumptions. We discuss why we're obsessed with making up things we don't really know and why it tends to have a really destructive impact on our lives. In addition, we cover a whole range of other topics including the price of bedding, corporate speak, Agatha Christie and her thoughts on assumption, religious cults, and John Denver. We also ponder the...

This week we're talking about why rejection hurts so much, what makes us take everything so personally, and why it's often better to let go at the times when we most want to hold on. We also discuss leather trousers, the usefulness of swearing, and how Martin reacted to being left out of the squad for a cup final. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.substack.com/...

This week we're talking about why we find it hard to make decisions, why we say yes when we mean no, and how we can relieve our stress and anxiety by confronting the issues that make us stressed and anxious. In addition, we mourn the demise of early closing and black football boots, Martin gets some feedback, and we disagree about Yorkshire Pudding. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ htt...

This week we're discussing the ways in which finding things to laugh about helps us to feel better about ourselves and how elusive it becomes in the madness of addiction. I spot a pop star lookalike, Martin is unimpressed with a lofty claim from a drinking game app, and we discover that shoes can be very useful in an emergency. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.subst...

This week we're talking about how to work out what matters most in life and to prioritise that instead of wasting time flicking through pictures of cats playing the piano (unless that IS important to you). We wonder why Henry James felt the need to repeat himself, disagree about Britpop, and observe a distinct lack of furniture restoration from Jay Blades on the BBC show "The Repair Shop...

This week we're talking about how to take care of our own needs in a positive and sustainable way, making sure that we move away from self-destruction and self-medicating towards something that is good for us in the long term. We discuss memorable sporting injuries, debate the best filling for a crispy pancake, and find gratitude close to home. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://...

This week we're talking about why seeking revenge when we feel hurt by someone else never gives us the resolution we're looking for. We debate the importance of choosing the right footwear when driving the car, highlight the perils of ordering a calendar online, and reminisce about the heady aroma of creosote. https://www.grahamlandiwellbeing.co.uk/ https://grahamlandi.substack.com/ You...

This week we're discussing the reasons why reported abductions by aliens have reduced in number over the past year or so and what it might have to do with alcohol. We're also talking about the little-known phenomenon of alcoholic blackouts. We manage to find our way to these subjects via pancakes and the 1970s chart-toppers Showaddywaddy. At one point we're even rudely interrupted b...