Recovery Daily Podcast

Step 1 in my stroke recovery started the same way Step 1 did in my sobriety. I had to admit that I’m powerless over my disability just as I did my alcoholism, and that my life had become unmanageable. I was in denial prior to the moment of admission in both situations. No one could see what was wrong with me, and with both, all the pain was between my ears. I could describe symptoms, explain the p...

What are you afraid of, and would you be willing to expose your fears? I used to be afraid to leave the house, talk to people, and even answer the phone. Now, at 9.5 years sober, many of my fears have been addressed, while a few are still very much alive. The biggest thread for me, abandonment, was exposed the first time I did my Step 4 in 2017. I have some irrational fears that I work on with my...

Everything in my head feels like a five-alarm fire. How do I take my emotional emergencies and right-size my thoughts and emotions so they match the situation I’m actually in. I tend to treat discomfort like it’s urgent, permanent, and catastrophic. Not every uncomfortable feeling requires an immediate action, and sometimes no response at all is the wisest. I’ve always had big emotions, but big fe...

When I’m pissed at someone, I played a role in the communication breakdown. I must stop fixating on what the other person did to me and look honestly at where I’ve been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking, or afraid (without turning it into a shame-fest). It’s humbling to set aside the emotional inner retaliation and ask, “What was my part?” So in today’s episode, I admit some of my real-life mistake...

Long-held resentments are the trickiest. Sobriety removes the anesthesia that kept old pain muted, so these resentments start peeking out of the chaos as the numbing wears off. Time fossilized them into the foundation of my life. Step Four gives those resentments a voice. What do I do with resentments when I can’t talk to the person? When they’re unreachable, unavailable, or no longer alive, closu...

I’m working on Step Four for the second time. That means I think about it and procrastinate, because yes, I have a spreadsheet and avoid actually filling it out. When I list my character defects for Step Four, I’m supposed to focus on the ones I have now that I’m sober. Still, I like to look at what sobriety itself has removed from my life, like lying, recklessness, and insecurity, because it reaf...

The first thing I do I the morning when my eyes open is remember that I’m a grateful recovering alcoholic and stroke survivor. I need to accept that before my feet hit the floor, so that I don’t fight what’s in front of me that day. Acceptance simplifies things. It clears my mind and quiets obsessive thinking, giving me the freedom to think instead of being held hostage by my own mind. Each day of...

Being wrong can make me feel unworthy, as if it says something about me as a person. We learn early on that being right equals competence, so we cling to that at the cost of curiosity and connection with others. But, being wrong is not a personal failure, it’s a part of learning. Every huge lesson I’ve  learned came from being very very wrong. When I allow myself to be wrong, I am open to new info...

Without rest, identity becomes performance. How true this has rung for me, both in my career and stroke recovery, as I rebuild my identity in this new broken body. I have a tendency to overdo it - my old boss can vouch for me. I pour myself into my podcast, hobbies, and new “brilliant” ideas without pause. Although these all start with purpose and intention, I’m not always acting from purpose.  So...

Take a walk with me today with Autumn through Lake of the Woods as I discuss what restraint feels like for me. Restraint has always been hard for me, but after my stroke it became a necessity. My alcoholism felt like a lack of restraint until I learned that it is a disease. Today lack of restraint costs me physical well-being. When I don’t stop in time, or I do more than I should, the pain in my h...

Anger was an unexpected emotion after my stroke. It’s a result of fear, loss of control, frustration, exhaustion, and daily pain. Anger is the wrap around the primary emotion at its core. Underneath it is grief, fear, and the uncertainty of living in a body and mind that don’t behave the way they used to. Anger is a choice, even though it feels very much like I’m a victim when I feel it. Even when...

The same tools that keep me sober help me thrive post-stroke despite chronic pain. I heard some meaningful slogans over the past 24 hours that help me: “Does this thought or action bring me closer to or further away from a drink.” I replace drink with God, pain, relief, or anything that moves me in the right direction. “When I approach a decision do I walk through the door first or do I hold the d...

I believe and doubt as much as I need to. My living amends to myself is choosing today what makes tomorrow’s me happier and healthier, gently leading the fearful parts of me when they don’t want to show up. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.  Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779   Visit my Etsy shop...

Wandering was how my loneliness showed itself long before I had words for it. I had some shameful memories bubbles today, and I turned them into useful lessons by opening my mouth and hitting “Record”. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.  Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779   Visit my Etsy shop, and...

My loneliness was a cunning unwellness I tried to outrun, numb, and distract myself from. But the absence of feeling at home inside myself began to heal when I removed alcohol from my life. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.  Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779   Visit my Etsy shop, and join my cre...

Applying my recovery program at work taught me tolerance, confidence, and acceptance without needing anyone else to change. What changed was my attitude. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.  Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779   Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling....

Trauma lives in my nervous system because it was in survival mode for far too long. I’m not broken. I’m gently teaching my loyal nervous system that the danger has passed. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. https://youtu.be/NUlnxCsRJD4 Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and joi...

Step 12 is waking up as the same imperfect human grateful for the new day, choosing willingness over old instincts, setting my problems down when no action can be taken, and living the Steps out loud so someone else knows they don’t have to do this alone. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.  Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recover...

Reads & Recovery is back! I invite you to read along with me this month as we explore The Body Keeps the Score, by Bessel van der Kolk, and weave its insights into our ongoing recovery conversations this month. Keep up with the Reads & Recovery Book Club all year long at https://recoverydailypodcast.com/reads-and-recovery/ . Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. ...

Progress is forward movement without a speed limit, bringing the body and letting the mind follow, rewarding myself for the tiniest little successes. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.  Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779   Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. htt...

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The holidays tend to resurrect old thought patterns about family roles, expectations, memories, and emotions that don’t usually carry as much weight throughout the rest of the year. Whether we’re surrounded by people or spending the season alone, the pressure can feel overwhelming and is very personal. In recovery that pressure can be like a tea kettle ready to scream, but we have tools to face it...

When I was newly sober and new to post-stroke life, I thought I’d never recover from either . Years later when someone praises my courage, I find it difficult to respond because it never felt like courage. It felt scary, uncomfortable, and impossible. The people I looked up to back then felt like superheroes, and I couldn’t imagine ever being seen that way. What looks like courage from the outside...

I live in recovery, and whether we talk about it or not, we’re all recovering from something. I talk a lot about sobriety and stroke recovery, but at its core, my podcast is about living better while managing mental wellness and waking up curious about the day instead of dreading it.  People say the phrase, “I’ve finally arrived.” That’s always impressed me. I was never going to get where I was go...

Every day feels like I’ve bought a new ticket on the roller coaster of my life. Yes, each day is a gift, and it’s another chance to learn how to manage all the invisible things happening beneath the surface. Recovery is more than stopping old behaviors or learning new ones. I’m managing the emotions, impulses, and reactions that once ran the show. Emotional hangovers can be just as miserable as ph...