Live IFS

🔸 Trying to be invisible, unwanted attention. Pros and cons of publishing ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form 😀Come chat with us: Discord 🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here: Itunes YouTube How to leave a review - iPhone 👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 I've been nervous for a long time. 🔹 Parts: P: Nervous. About getting it wrong, being not acceptable, see Es P: nervous isn’t pressing P: condescendingly amused by nervous. People like me better when im jokey. But nervous is stronger as im less prone to employ jokey now. P: black out, a big velvet curtain. “You don’t wanna know why im here” P: the people behind the barricade, one w constructio...

🔸 A different atmosphere for Perky & Sad ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form 😀Come chat with us: Discord 🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here: Itunes YouTube How to leave a review - iPhone 👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 Dark is cozy. 🔹 Parts: - Fear of judgement re offering coaching. Digs its heels in, hesitant to announce offering. - The dark part - The kid In the dark, w adult face. The darkness is my friend, people are sometimes mean and judgy. Coloring in the dark, wants to show people what she makes - Spiritually elevated, feels superior - Dust alien (sage version), advising to sit quietly 📌 Theresa fol...

🔸 Why the middle one had no voice. 🔹 Parts: P: Keeping me small rather be encouraging me, thinks im 5-10, a child playing dress up P: Analytical part, picking apart chronology E: the little one E: the middle one, still feels vulnerable. Couldn’t sleep, fear. Struggle w external expectations. Didn’t have a voice. Wants to breathe out the voicelessness but can’t do that fully since little one hold...

🔸 Running away & right back. Sadness is beautiful. 🔹 Parts: P running away (walk in freezer) P right back (manager world builder) P anger for those provoking: E 6mo. deep sadness, loneliness, inadequacy. Nobody understands or sees. Wants physical closeness 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: Tech problems delayed us 10-15 mins. Usually a blessing in disguise. ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feedb...

🔸 Fluid dynamics, attachment parenting: When you let kids do their own thing, you have to have way more patience and ask them what they want to do. 🔹 Parts: P: The dont share part. underneath anxiety, things im not saying, not doing vs P: Do the right thing, be transparent E: we want to materialize, exploited, feel uncompensated, want more consent 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: Lots I could...

🔸 The wordless way to the voiceless one 🔹 Parts: “No one I can talk to” Hazy. “Nobody knows I exist unless I…” 2️⃣ P youre doing it wrong triggers P hazy = don’t get invested. working since maybe 8 E crushed. yearning for connection, friendship, didn’t know the code P fear of silence in call, don’t bore James P you have to act, get better vs P let things evolve P your gonna fail 🎓 What I'd like...

🔸 Don’t Move. 🔹 Parts: P: If there aren’t any red flags, it’s because he’s lying. P: Grief around letting above belief go. P: frozen when flags come up P: excited to trust E?: Shame for being frozen 21: assaulted P: don’t make yourself a victim, it’s not ok to not be ok P: if we could just remember every painful detail, then we could heal 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: Cool this room do...

🔸 Potions, yoga, propaganda. Doing nothing with a fine cool kid. 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I think my own my own confidence / clarity would have been stronger if there was less time between calls. ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form 😀Come chat with us: Discord 🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here: Itu...

🔸 A drop of poison: Just face it, it’s probably cancer. 🔹 Parts: P: hopeful P: just face it Age 8: crushed, parents divorcing. She can’t take another blow. Just wants me to stay 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I thought of offering longer, but Bee almost always keeps it under an hour. That’s why I didn’t go into exile territory, didn’t want to risk a shake up. ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feed...

🔸 We can talk to each other, I’m here, I see you, you belong. 2️⃣ Stuff the protocol 🔹 Parts: P: Reluctance to show generosity by acknowledging siblings' parts. “You’re not gonna go there”. Armored. “Obliteration, wipe out, annihilation! Stay back, this danger isn’t worth it”. It doesn’t trust im big enough P: scared to go to above, cause the big energy P: charging, “sort it out or fail” 2️⃣ P:...

🔸 Unsanctioned IFS. Dark magic. 🔹 Parts: Ps: fear of attempting to help, what if you cause harm. Values humility, dislikes overconfidence and bravado. wants to feel certain E: small teen. Wants someone outside to make me ok, deem me as capable. Ive never been acceptable, good enough, could never do anything right. (Related to mom, and from younger times) there was always disapproval 🎓 What I&#3...

🔸 Pieces of resistance v eternal optimist 🔹 Parts: P: resistance & distraction “you have to keep moving” to make progress and to not settle. Lack of trust in people. Moat digger. Resists appreciation and the P: eternal optimist E: has been hurt, doesn’t feel safe E: 20yo, things getting dark ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form 😀Come chat with us: Discord 🙏PLEASE help In...

🔸 Concrete plans to change the world, clean my room. 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: In my early-to-IFS-days, a call like this would have parts in me protesting “hey this isn't IFS! We're all over the place!” They’re not wrong; this isn't in the manuals. But, I kept asking myself, “any parts up? Is this Self speaking?” The answer changed frequently, as so many of my parts reso...

🔸 Whispering secrets game ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form 😀Come chat with us: Discord 🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here: Itunes YouTube How to leave a review - iPhone 👉 Find your ACE score with this one-page questionnaire

🔸 Challenges with Live IFS. And I'm sick of being sick. 📌 James followed up: I came up with a solution for one of those challenges. I drafted a "whatever happened to..." page. Will sleep on it, probably publish later. 🎓 What Christine would like to do differently: I think I could have been clearer and much more thorough in my recapping of the Sick of talking about part. I can see...

🔸 Keeping it light, no light. 2️⃣ Pink: you’re to blame Red: Full catastrophe. I blame myself, I wanted so much not to do damage. 🔹 Parts: P: Self hatred (critic), collapsing, self medicating. howling w the deep dark music. Underneath is the rage being squashed in a box. Wants to relive 20s, build things, have fun. P: Agenda looking for the answers, conflicting w P: Resistance to going back that...

🔸 This happened and I love you, I'm here. (Continuing with exile from last call) 📌 Christine followed up: https://open.spotify.com/track/756ziR2z4iXkK35qwBLUiY?si=o1X1ie1QyyYVZ9fnPAjQ Thank you again for holding that tender space with me, it really means a lot more than words can really say. Poured myself a cup of tea and put some music on shuffle. The first song that came felt like a direct...

🔸 Disintegration, trying to play too many roles at once. 🔹 Parts: P: Anxious puppeteer, manage, protect, avoid drama E: 6,7,8 kept down, stifled. Completely unsupported, humiliating. Needed containment. Abandoned 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: My guesses weren't on point but didn’t take us off track, and all the mining/searching didn't cause disruption, but also didn’t get the c...

🔸 A plain fact. Internal family standards of beauty. 🔹 Parts: P: this is a small minded problem, im over it, they’re obsessed. Would by wiped out by: P: starve myself, obsessed w appearance E: age 4,5,6 Locked in the basement. Dishwater hair, forgettable and plain. Total defective inadequacy, gross, badly formed, hopeless. I didn’t draw a good hand. you’re not pretty. Odd one out, never get it r...

🔸 The lower chamber: Anger's place. 🔹 Parts: P: Anger, radiating brambles around grief and fear bodies. P: Annoyed by depth of anger and lots of things. Helps get the job done E: not seen/understood, stuck 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: Parts of me are hesitant to share this call. When we see a caller struggling, we can all relate. But these big movements are uncommon and hard to ex...

🔸 Vietnam is too fun, too dangerous. 🎓 What Christine would like to do differently: I’d like to relax into the experience more.  Which could look like: working some more with the part that’s been concerned we’re going to fuck this up. That part of me takes this role (of coach/guide) very seriously and doesn’t have any room for error. I can notice parts of the call where I’m more focused and tune...

🔸 Christmas sucks. And “If I can’t explain IFS, why bother?” 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I was on the fence about sharing the philosophical stuff, just wanted to offer an off-ramp. ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form 😀Come chat with us: Discord 🙏PLEASE help Internal Family Systems reach more people. Subscribe, give a rating, or comment here: Itunes YouTube How to...

🔸 (Veterinary) Emergency mode. 🔹 Parts: P: Don’t cry (out loud), stop exposing this, it’s too messy, sounds pathetic, you won’t be understood. “Do not pity me” P: that part is a hard ass, policing is pointless P: emergency mode, frantic, vigilant. I’m failing if cats aren’t well, research more, projection, catastrophizing. What else am I supposed to do? This is how we avoid: sitting down and cry...