Live IFS

🔸 Making time to grieve. Can love save the day? 🔹 Parts: The un-deserver "Accept the facts: you could have done more, you didn't, so you're the worst". Afraid of overwhelm from grief, afraid of being uncaring, and of moving on. The manager "Dont accept it: you couldn't have done more. If you accept you could have prevented it, you'll never be able to get over the l...

🔸 Laughter, tears, & good news! We both bring something new today. 🔹 Parts: P: stay busy! The boy controlling robots E: world is too cruel, helpless, I'm responsible. age: 4 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I think I did a lot of things better today, inspired by Bill Tierney. There’s some thing about how he organizes his thoughts and the work, methodical but not constrained. He&#3...

🔸 "A warmth in my heart" for "lights-out, don't go there." 📌 Scott followed up: Thanks for the session once again. I feel like you're having to work pretty hard sometimes in our sessions to keep me on track. But I really appreciate your trying to keep me focussed. Its been a little intense for me sometimes. Tonight got me a little off guard though. I was riding high f...

🔸 "A sense of awe" Another speed run. 🔹 Parts: P: The Dreamer/Planner (fear of boredom and alone) P: The Consumer/Addict (fear of boredom and alone) P: The parent yelling "youre weak" (fights Consumer) E: The ~6yo. Alone a lot as a child. 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: Incredible what we can accomplish in 40 minutes, especially considering 10 of those are in silence....

🔸 "What kind of mother...?" Humiliated and betrayed: a mother in exile. Charlotte has been playing with IFS for over a decade, and is a frequent listener, but this is her first session with a practitioner. 🔹 Parts: E: the mother: worried, abandoned, betrayed, robbed, confused, hurt, desperate, deprived, dispairing. (And guilty acknowledging any upside). Seen as a loser by: P: You have...

🔸 Wonderland, a family story, and the part they left out. 🔹 Parts: P: Concern. Smooths the path, keeps from tripping up, stumbling around. Always scanning the environment internal and external. Rather be floating, doing barrel rolls. Thinks Genie is: E: Impulsive, oblivious little kid. Age ~5. Intimidated and feeling awful. ----- 🗳 Send anonymous feedback to James: Feedback Form 😀Come chat with...

🔸 "How dare you!" Continuing our last convo, we encounter the Rage in Red. 🔹 Parts: P1,2: The Tranquilizer and Pushing away P3: The guilt pushes down the rage P: Rage, "Something is being violated, what is happening is not right, how dare you!" Afraid, without it, I would have become a zombie, or insane, or suicided. Wants to be: Seen, Heard, To express its wants and get a re...

🔸 “There’s something coming”. Meandering, parts meet Self. 🔹 Parts: P: The steel core, intellectual, the stopper (but also saying don’t stop there?). The bridge, "don’t collapse, don’t be weak." Needs a moat. ? The can stomper P: The lookout, thinks she’s 12 E: The 12 year old 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I was kinda lost, drifting, through a lot of this convo. My questions...

🔸 How am I supposed to act in this situation?* 🔹 Parts: P: Laughter, afraid of being excluded P: You should be more serious, afraid of a terrible existence P: "I'll be fine" (going above/around the rules) P: "'I'll be fine' is dangerous" (maybe the serious part?) E(s): 8yo? Being excluded, "how am I supposed to act?", fear of being blind to the rules...

🔸 The shit kicker and- Oh, a baby on my knee! *Part shares a song: https://youtu.be/SI8RmHw1QpY 🔹 Parts: P: 27yo, leather jacket, tough. If not tough, people will run all over you. “I will let you see he baby if you believe in her”. Polarized, in opposition to P: Acquiesce (see last call), be timid E?: The wimp, sneaky. We didn’t get a good look. Went from being blended to hiding behind P1. P: T...

🔸 “Acceptance is a cope, not a strategy”. An airtight gang of 3 (or more) fights to keep the love out. Love finds a way. 🔹 Parts: The Agenda: "Go deep!", wants evidence The Cynic: "This never works" The Wall: doesn't want compassion to reach other parts, doesn't want to feel like a sucker. 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: Feeling sick today, so I had concerns g...

🔸 Judgement around appearance/weight. Legacy and cultural burdens. 🔹 Parts: Not emotional eating, but the part that judges appearance Face, throat, angry It's an exile, similar in a few ways to last sessions: "He made me this way". But controlling internal not external. 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I've been studying too much lately, trying to change too many things...

🔸 "Prove it!" & "This is yours" The keeper of keys, an ally. 🔹 Parts: The top guy, the Keeper of keys still asking to be seen and appreciated, but now has a role of discerning when self is present. "you can’t do it, you don’t know how" , mean, wants to prove that to: The good girl 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: Was the spaceyness a part? I think not. Bu...

🔸 Fear of grief. "...there's a hole in my chest and people can see inside of it" 📍Scott followed up: ... to help our work together be more effective and go more smoothly. And I was thinking that maybe writing you an email or two in between sessions related to the parts work we’ve done and also my solo work might be a mutually beneficial way to give us both some more insight and inf...

🔸 Background rage toward injustice is causing problems. Genie has listened to several Live IFS calls, done some therapy, but never an IFS Session. 🔹 Parts: P: Blatherer, ranting and raging about justice/fairness when driving, grocery shopping. Seen as a nuisance by: P: Hates the blatherer. Thinks shes 9,10. Wants to not be forgotten. P: I handle the shit, don't negotiate with people (or part...

🔸 Pushing to claim my space keeps me up at night… Romance, boundaries, and a surprise visit from The Tranquilizer (dissociation) 🔹 Parts: P: Tranquilizer, anesthesia, whiteout. Proud of doing it painlessly. Rather be a floating cloud on standby, watching, communicating. Allowed to speak. Thinks Mio is very young, and up to ~30. Most concerned about E1. P: Get all the sweet things, affection, by...

🔸 Close the book, just move on, have fun! But something is holding back... 🔹 Parts: P: Just move on, have fun! And the other side of that part: Don't go there. Thinks she's 30 (age of getting married). Afraid of being damaged by going to the dark places. Wants to lock it away P: the wallower, enjoys wallowing in the other stuff E: The nut in the shadows, with a sliver of healing light....

🔸 Acquiescing, Going along with unwanted touch. And James gets feedback. 🔹 Parts: Assertive (but always shut down) say no to this touch! Acquiescing. Be nice, or be a bitch. E's? 17yo? Parts worried about being left alone, scaring people off. 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I felt particularly unhelpful in this conversations. + Points for being honest about it and not spinning out, a...

🔸 "...to self-discover without shame". Meeting an exile & more very welcome questions about the process. 🔹 Parts: P: Terrified... P: The information seeker, thinks he is 12. Covering up, scared of overwhelm from: E: Powerless, not knowing, can't ask for help, shame, hiding. ~12yo? Believes it will be judged, that it doesn't have the intuition & capabilities of others, f...

🔸 "No longer defending myself from 'bad' thoughts", ruminating. Appreciating the beauty of protectors. 🔹 Parts: Don’t go there: 7 year old says to depressed part. Don't ruminate. Go there: The one who wants to rush past and get there. Afraid to be left behind. Visions of a basement… 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I told Scott I had to keep it under an hour, thats w...

🔸 Existential, Fear of death. Building on her connection with task manager, Olivia is ready to meet those exiles! Protectors, on the other hand... 🔹 Parts: P: Manager "Have to do a good job" checking mistakes so they don't accumulate or go unnoticed. E?: "Life is set in stone". Mistakes = catastrophe. Death, grief and loss. 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: I think...

🔸 "The one part that doesn't belong": a part resembling dad, enraged by children not listening or fighting. 🔹 Parts: 5 year old, crying with sister that the toys would all be thrown away 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: A lot on my mind about this one. I was extra slow in the beginning, just was trying to open up to new possibilities. I think there may be some truth to this...

🔸 James talks with the part that doesn't. 🔹 Parts: Keep the doors locked. Needs to be seen and appreciated first 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: At times I felt I was being too pushy or confrontational, but my logical parts like being met in the logical realm, so I wanted this part to know I'm happy to do that, that I didn't need to rely on any voodoo to communicate with it....

🔸 "A nice boy" 📍At around 14m I resolve the awkward 3rd (4th?) person pronoun stuff. And sorry about the background noise, I was playing with the mic. Trying new things! 🔹 Parts: P: Analysis Paralysis. Constant. Too many things. Wants few options, to be on a boat. P: Pusher, push past analyzer. Afraid of gathering dust, being a loser E: 14. Just wants to hold hands (and a blank check...

🔸 Be competent or feel worthless. 🔹 Parts: P: Competent critic. Fear of failure. Thinks Brandon is 7. Wants to defer to: P: Distractor, daydreamer planner. E: Not mattering, worthless. 🎓 What I'd like to do differently: In the past I've gotten lost, carried away in our convos. Today I identified the repeated blendedness, and was able to see many fewer parts. But I was steamrolling, push...