Just Break Up: Relationship Advice from Your Queer Besties

Yes, white supremacy poisons everything. No, that doesn’t mean the kind, self-aware white man you’re dating is going to do you harm. Without worst-case-scenario-ing yourself to death, try to prepare for the difficult things that are likely to happen if you do commit to this interracial relationship. (And if the worst case does happen, you can just break up!)  Join us on Patreon for an extra weekl...

Compatibility isn’t being the same, it’s finding someone whose differences fit yours. Instead of thinking you might one day “fix” your more inactive, laidback partner, see if you can accept that you have different lifestyles (and that productivity and rest are equally valuable, capitalism be damned).  Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: justbre...

As a non-binary parent in our Incredibly Gendered World, you WILL have awkward conversations and tense moments, but in the bubble of family, you can affirm and honor your identity. Outside that bubble, it’s up to you who you correct and who you leave in ignorance; when it matters and when sacrificing your peace isn’t worth it. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams...

It’s only natural to feel abandoned by a partner who leaves for months-long work trips (especially if you’re stuck in upstate New York…). Remember that they’re not the villain—the situation just isn’t working. Figure out what you need from the relationship and approach the problem as a TEAM. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.c...

You don’t owe people who have hurt you anything. If someone disregards your core identity then has the audacity to turn up after FOUR YEARS and invite you to their wedding, you can respond, or not. You can tell the truth, or not. You can open up about how they hurt you, or not. The only thing you should absolutely do is block-block-block immediately after. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly...

You can give someone your best on a silver platter, and they might not like silver. That tells us nothing about you, except that you weren’t right for them. Be kind to yourself until you find the one who loves precious metals—and don’t even try to be friends with your ex until “I love you” fades to “I’d be fine playing a board game with you then leaving.” Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly ep...

It’s not wrong to want to hurt the person who hurt you (but it is wrong to take your scathing shower comebacks into the real world). You can’t reason your way out of anger, but you can rely on your circle to build yourself up, let people know how much this experience affected you, and remember that this won’t be this hard forever. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestre...

Not having a threesome isn’t an excuse for cheating. And if they did cheat, then you get to decide how the relationship goes from there. Ask yourself: Is it working? Is it worth it? Have they earned their place in your life? Or is the well bone dry, and you’re holding out for trickles? It’s abundant elsewhere if you’re willing to look. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive liv...

Having empathy is not at odds with demanding accountability. You can respond compassionately to someone’s struggles and still advocate for what you need to have a healthy, functioning relationship with them—anywhere from setting a series of small boundaries to cutting them off completely. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com FA...

Your ex’s new relationship did not rise out of the corpse of your old one. Some people choose to leave us (and in decidedly cruel ways, too). It’s definitely unfair that we’re forced to carry the pain of their actions, but we CAN rightsize our trauma and investigate what’s hiding behind our embarrassment. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: just...

Happy Valentine's Day! Or Not. Whatever, it's just a Tuesday. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com FACEBOOK: /justbreakuppod INSTAGRAM: @justbreakuppod TWITTER: @justbreakuppod BLIND DATE: Food Science Babe Just Break Up is a production of Du Vide Media. Make sure to check out all of our amazing shows! Learn more about your ad...

Adult friendships are HARD. But they’re worth it, even if every new friend won’t be your BFF (or show you their butt, *cough cough* Sam). By recognizing the extreme diversity in human relationships, we can meet people where they are, enforce our boundaries, and enjoy the connection as is without expecting all friends to fulfill all needs. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive l...

Dating again after marriage? Welcome to your second adolescence! Be kind to yourself as you learn this new skill, especially if you’re carrying around grief that you don’t know where to put. Start challenging your own preferences as you explore the parameters of your desire—don’t worry, you’re not wasting anyone’s time. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and mor...

Get this lady a horse so that she can ride outta that wedding! If you need more time to make a major life decision, take it. Just make sure the decision is “do I want to marry THIS man, THIS month?” and not “do I want to be with this man or this OTHER man?” (or worse, the IDEA of this other man). Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: justbreakupp...

It’s okay to want to be with someone who has more to say. But it’s more important to figure out what their silence triggers in you. If your anxiety monster will allow it, imagine what it would feel like to believe your partner when they say “I’m fine.” Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com FACEBOOK: /justbreakuppod INSTAGRAM: @...

Can you believe sexuality is more complicated than checking a box?! It’s physical, nebulous, and doesn’t need to be confirmed or denied by your partnerships. Whether you stay in a safe, loving relationship with a man, end your marriage to pursue passionate sex with a woman, or explore an in-between that works for you, you don’t need immediate clarity—or a label. Join us on Patreon for an extra wee...

Parents aren’t some little nuggets to be unearthed. For the healthiest relationship with them, the trick is setting reasonable expectations and boundaries that are more sustainable than trying to change them, and learning to give yourself the thing you desperately wish they’d give you (easier said than done, we know). Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more!...

Yes, breakups are a mindf*** on every single level. But just because your ex is having a reaction you can’t see doesn’t mean your relationship wasn’t important. It means you don’t have access to each other anymore, but you do have teammates you can turn to. (And if all else fails, you can always call upon The Block, or its trusted sidekick, The Mute.) Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode...

Hi! Welcome to Just Break Up: Relationship Advice From Your Queer Besties. Sam & Sierra may not be therapists, but they will tell it to you straight (even if they aren’t). Each episode, they answer listeners’ questions with compassion, radical honesty, and all the relationship advice you don’t want—but definitely need. And no, it’s not always “just break up.” (Unless you really should!) Learn more...

Yesika Salgado is a Los Angeles-based Salvadoran poet who writes about her family, culture, city, and fat body. She is a leading voice in poetry, both in performance and social media. She has garnered a large online following across multiple social media platforms through her poetry and her determination to make poetry accessible to everyone in everyday scenarios. The conversation covers the wild...

Sorry, but we can’t have kinky sexual liberation without honest conversation and self-reflection. Remember to: define the specific yeses and nos of your relationship (polyamorous or otherwise), tend to your wound instead of telling yourself not to be hurt, and set the boundaries you need, even if that’s loving someone from afar.  Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestrea...

Are you afraid of being a “second choice?” Caught in a sexless marriage? Slowly losing your friend to a jealous partner? Whether choosing forgiveness, being brave enough to try something new, or just letting go of control, we can create change in our thoughts and relationships. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com FACEBOOK: /j...

Camonghne Felix is a writer, poet, and communications strategist from New York. She was the director of surrogates and strategic communications for Elizabeth Warren's 2020 presidential campaign. Her debut poetry collection, Build Yourself A Boat, was longlisted for the 2019 National Book Award, and her newest book, Dyscalculia, will be released through Penguin Random House on February 14, 2023. Th...

Sometimes, you need to be the one to give yourself permission--permission to say no to a good love because it’s not right for you; permission to prioritize the relationship with yourself over someone else; permission to not sleep with that married man even though you really want to. Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, exclusive livestreams, and more! SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com FACEBOO...

We all have needs. Sometimes it’s just a quiet presence; sometimes it’s accountability. Other times, it’s just a ride to the airport. Learning how to discern our needs and understanding whether they are *really* being met is the forever work of relationships. Join us on Patreon and check out our special new years office hours on 12/29! SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com FACEBOOK: /justbreakuppod INSTAGRAM...