Intimate Covenant Podcast

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer some of the questions from the Tampa Marriage Day 2023. Name the three greatest examples of marriage in the Bible. How to have a conversation with your spouse about something they think is “dirty”? What if I feel that I’ve married the wrong person? What does it look like to see my spouse as the image of God and hold them in awe? Please suppo...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode Matt and Jenn respond to two listener questions regarding expectations about orgasm: My husband’s efficient/impatient personality prevents me from mentally and physically “getting there” for fear I’m taking too long. How do we strive for better? It feels like my husband only feels satisfied with our sex if I orgasm… but sometimes I don’t feel like orgasming but sti...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn reveal the guest performer for the Annual Marriage Retreat in September. Also, we'll share about our personal struggles in balancing this ministry and some restructuring of our vision for Intimate Covenant as we move forward into new opportunities. Look for the next intimate Covenant episode in TWO weeks, and every 2 weeks going forward.  The...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn share a recording from the Q&A session at a recent Marriage Day event in Dallas, TX.  Some challenging questions that we discussed are: How often should a couple have sex? How can we still have great sex with a house full of kids? What if we are both sexual responders? How can learn to stop pouting when I get rejected? What can be done about ED...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn are joined by Christian sex blogger and author (and friend), J. Parker of Hot, Holy & Humorous , to discuss the non-typical dynamic when the wife is the sexual pursuer. While not the majority, relationships where the wife has the higher sexual desire is certainly more common than many would think. Most of the time, this dynamic does not indicat...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn compare all of the different birth control options -- how they work,  their advantages and disadvantages. The decision whether to use birth control should be carefully considered after you’ve considered whether your motivations stem from a sense of responsible use of God’s blessings in your life or whether you are being motivated by selfish and mat...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn encourage couples to make intentional and biblically informed decisions about birth control. The conversation about birth control must start by rejecting society’s notion that children are a negative to my personal life and to society. Rather, we must view children as God sees them — a sacred blessing and holy responsibility. That said, responsible...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn share their method of critically assessing the state of their own marital intimacy and some tips on how to have the conversation about setting goals for better connection.  For real progress in your marriage, it’s important to critically evaluate the past and to set goals for the future. A thorough evaluation of your marriage should include assessm...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn consider the question, "What do I want from my marriage?" Is there a better question as we consider New Year's resolutions for our marriages? Mature past the selfish motivations of relationship and begin to see the true fulfillment of covenant love built on self-sacrifice — in your marriage and in your relationship to God. For this n...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn suggest some meaningful wedding gift ideas that may not be on the engaged couple's registry. Rather than an arbitrary choice from the wedding registry, consider a more thoughtful and relationship-focused wedding gift for the newlyweds in your life. Providing resources for date nights or getaways is a great way to invest in a young couple. Prof...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice and tips for planning a a special and intimate honeymoon experience. We're continuing our series aimed at not-yet-married couples. Share this episode with engaged couples that you know to help them avoid common pitfalls that lead to honeymoon disappointment. When planning your honeymoon, be mindful of the purpose of your honeymoon...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice to couples who are not yet married, and to those of us who should be mentoring these premarital couples. Choosing your spouse is one of the most important and consequential decisions one will make. The way that we are dating will play an important part of getting this right. Premarital counseling, before and after engagement, is a cruc...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice about giving and receiving sexy gifts.  Consider starting a sexy Christmas tradition. This is a great time to gift your sexual relationship by exchanging sexy presents and/or by making time for a Christmas Eve quickie. If you are a sexual pursuer, be sure that you are primarily considering what is best for encouraging sexual connection...

Send us Fan Mail In this encore episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how to keep your relationship and your sex life from freezing over during the busy holiday season. Protect your spouse. Make sure they know that you’ve got their back. Approach your extended families with an “us vs. them” mentality. Prioritize your spouse and your relationship. You absolutely MUST make time to continue to connect wit...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how the sexual relationship can sometimes be a pathway to help smooth and heal emotional or spiritual conflicts.  Rather than seeing your relational conflicts as a barrier to your sex life, consider that investing in your sexual relationship can be an important tool to build and strengthen your whole marriage. Recognize the power of the sex...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss characteristics of your sexual relationship that may be pointing to some deeper and broader issues in your marriage. Your sexual relationship doesn’t happen in a bubble. It is a reflection of the whole of your relationship and is affected by the quality of your spiritual, emotional and physical intimacy. If there are signs of an unhealthy s...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn challenge the mind set of "foreplay." Is there a better way to think about the process of building sexual arousal? The concept of “foreplay” may be counterproductive to a godly and healthy view of sexuality since this idea limits a definition of sex to just intercourse and promotes the goal of sex as orgasm. Instead, consider embracing th...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn continue the conversation about oral sex -- tips and techniques to help make oral sex more comfortable and pleasurable for the giver and the receiver. There are plenty of ways to help make oral sex more pleasant and more pleasurable, especially for the hesitant spouse. For the giver or receiver, be creative, offer feedback and be curious about each...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss moral, emotional and physical aversions to oral sex. How does a hesitant giver or receiver confront your blocks? Oral sex is as biblically acceptable as any other means of sexual intimacy. Whether or not you incorporate oral sex into your marriage bed is ultimately up to you and your spouse. But, we hope we can encourage you to find as many...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the never-ending conflict of “I want one thing, but my spouse wants something entirely different.” How do I convince my spouse to see it my way? We need to stop asking the question, “How do I get my spouse to do …?” Instead, if we want to love like Christ, we need to be asking, “What does my spouse need me to do?” When exploring why my spou...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn share the rest of the Q&A session from this year's Retreat, including J. Parker of Hot, Holy & Humorous . We covered questions about: How to be there for a spouse dealing with past trauma, especially when it comes to emotional/conflict conversations. I struggle with porn. My wife is aware of my struggle, but I don't always tell he...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer questions from a live audience at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat! We are joined by Julie Parker of Hot, Holy & Humorous and her husband, Jay, for a round table of fun and insightful responses. How do women have multiple orgasms? I have friends that are capable to do so easily, even in unhealthy marriages. Is it a physical or mental abi...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt and Jenn revisit a previous episode about sexual desire differences. In general, a man’s sexual desire is like a microwave (spontaneous) and a woman’s sexual desire is like a crockpot (responsive). Neither is right or wrong and neither is better or worse. Empathize with your spouse’s position by offering grace, mercy, and understanding. Learn to embrace your...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the benefits of heightening our five senses to enhance our sexual experience -- including practical tips! We often limit the potential of our sexual experience and pleasure by narrowly focusing our sensations. I can focus my body and mind to be more present in the sexual experience by concentrating on the five senses. By heightening or taki...

Send us Fan Mail In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some eye-opening observations after spending some  time with a group of unmarried Christians talking about the the unique challenges that they face in their pursuit of holiness.  Here's what we learned from them: Unmarried Christians are vulnerable to struggles with sexual temptation and loneliness. I need to do a better job of helping s...