Goonie’s World

After landing on the ice planet of Kagena, Chris and Ted learn that the Hiver they seek has been locked up. Paying for his release, the travellers are now able to do business with each other, but not before all three of them are attacked. Finally, the traders secure their cargo and refuel their ship, but Chris can’t resist sneaking a peek. Unknown to Ted, the cargo turns out not to be medical supp...

A former Marine captain, Ted Higgenbottom, and a former merchant captain, Christopher Jones, have teamed up as traders looking to earn some credits. At a hotel lounge on the planet Rhylanor, an enigmatic young woman offers them a lucrative job delivering secret cargo to natives of the planet Cipatwe. After accepting the deal, the business partners can’t help but notice that both they and their pat...

As the bittens battle their furry foe, the violence once again turns vehicular and ends abruptly. While contemplating who to return the stolen blood to, Dirge gets himself a “Big Gulp” at a convenience store, and Cam comes out as a Poison fan. Ultimately finding themselves back in the sewer, the vampires gain additional info and devise a plan, returning to Cel Tredat Castle for a party that lasts...

As Cam, Dirge, and Rudy follow the bloodmobile on route to the blood bank, they are surprised by the sudden appearance of competition, and a high-speed scrap ensues. Afterward, having taken advantage of a fortuitous opportunity, the bittens pull into a parking lot and are hit with yet another curveball.

Dirge and Cam explore Harkness Memorial Hospital, dealing with an unexpected complication at a nurse’s station, and later, break into a linen closet. On Saturday, the vampires observe the blood drive from behind the tinted windows of their Grand National, witnessing some interesting details.

After encountering a mysterious woman in the parking lot of The Tar Pit, Cam and Dirge are invited into the sewers to meet her leader, Ben Odum. Once inside, Ben has a lot to say about Broodmaster Lucian and offers a proposal to the bittens. Following up on one of Ben’s claims, they return to the surface and drive back to Cel Tredat Castle, checking out the off-limits basement. Afterward, the vamp...

During the 1980s, newly turned vampires in the small town of Pitchwood, California are tasked with robbing a blood bank for their broodmaster. But before they do anything else, the bittens, Dirge Tempo and Cameron “Cam” Clinton, must go out into the night to feed on their own for the very first time.

Facing off against a huge, enraged dog-man, Honcho and Mr. Pickle make full use of their assorted arsenal and accumulated mutations. Leaving the lower level in flames, the scrappers return to the “ring room” and experiment with the interdimensional portal. After a sensible plea from Dennis, the two focus their attention back on what could be the ultimate scrap reward, if they could only get it bac...

Dennis and Honcho continue to explore Bane Labs, attempting to make sense of the strange technology they encounter. After finally taking the elevator down, the adventurers come across a curious scene and decide they just can’t let sleeping dogs lie.    

The Boomtown scrappers scope out the Bane Labs building and eventually, with help from a mutation, find a way inside. There, they discover giant, bewildering machinery and disturbing secrets. Dennis smokes cigarettes while Honcho searches for a keycard requested by a talking elevator.

Honcho Pi and Mr. Pickle arrive at Maggie’s hotel, questioning the owner and an ex-soldier, as well as bargaining for the cigarettes in the machine sitting in the foyer. After spending the rest of the evening munching on Chubby Chodes, the scrappers check out the next morning, searching for a man they’ve briefly encountered before.       

Exploring the flying saucer-shaped Bane Center, Dennis and Honcho are pleasantly surprised at what they discover. Following up on info they received, they turn their attention to an old police station, guarded by a security bot. On the way, they decide to check out the ruins of a legendary hotdog restaurant. Finally reaching the station, the scrappers are forced to turn to recklessness after tacti...

In a post-apocalyptic settlement called Boomtown, two men decide to test their luck by venturing into the radioactive wastes beyond their home in search of precious scrap. After bidding farewell to their neighbors, the aging Dennis Pickle and his adult ward, Honcho, set off to a ruined city, unsure if they’ll ever return.

Having dealt with the imperial battle-blimps, Agony and Salami reach the Caribbean island of Montserrat and question the villagers while undercover as ordinary sexy travelers. After hearing tales of strange goings-on at an observatory, the SBWs ascend the slopes of a volcano and face-off with hundreds of rogue automatons, the mysterious Flavius Dio, and the mustachioed Septimus Foul himself.

Agony and Salami enter the Tower of the Imperial Sorceress with the intent of studying Septimus Foul’s captured automaton. After an epically sexy battle, the wizards steer their castle toward an island that may hold the clue to Foul’s whereabouts. Before they reach their destination, however, Lucretia Salacious enacts her revenge.

As members of the College Errant, Salami Razzmatazz and Agony Cataclysm roam the world in their flying castle performing heroic deeds. When Septimus Foul, the arch-villain and former member of the College Errant, escapes from a penitentiary, the sexy battle wizards are on the case.

With the Trickster’s tower looming before them, the wandering adventurers must find a way to deal with the giant eagle blocking their path. Afterwards, within the unexpected interior of the tower, the stage is set for their final challenge, and the Trickster lives up to his namesake.

Inside Mischief Mountain, Sir Han, Numinous, and Billy, make their way across deep chasms, while enduring swarms of bats. Once outside again, the adventurers encounter both friendly and unfriendly forest creatures, eventually finding their way forward thwarted by a massive, winged beast.

When Sir Han Duran, a righteous Invoker, and Numinous Glaux, a timid Magician, follow a mysterious treasure map, it leads them to Treasure Town, a small and seemingly idyllic village. The traveling companions soon meet a woman named Fiona Fairweather who invites them to take part in the Trickster’s Test, a game that, if successful, will reward each of them with an item from the town’s museum. Thei...

Exploring Dr. Say’s apartment, Harmony and Dex find someone hiding. After getting their biggest lead so far, the sleuths deliberate their next move: infiltrating an exclusive club called the Suicide A-Go-Go Bowl. They decide to pose as musicians, but getting in is just the beginning. If they want to save Trinity, the duo must perform in perfect...harmony.  

Leaving Triple G’s office, Dex and Harmony head back to Chinatown and speak with Johnny Tong. The Triad member refers them to a doctor who lives in the Gorky Heights neighborhood. Just as the two PIs are taking the elevator up to the midlevel, Harmony’s stalker, Jackson Mummy, finally makes a move.  

In the Underbelly of Upper Midwest Metroplex, a brooding PI named Dexter “Dex” Farley drinks alone at a back-alley Chinatown bar when a beautiful blonde walks in. Her name is Harmony Valentine, and she’s also a PI. They’ve never gotten along, but Harmony is desperate. A woman they both care about is missing, and partnering up presents the best chance of finding her. Together, they’ll have to navig...

A series of desperate actions leads to Bing and Bart stealing a Jupiter Springs Brewing Company 18-wheeler with a potential bigfoot in the back and finding themselves in the same dicey situation as their first scene. What happens next will go down as Jupiter Springs legend and forever be imprinted on the minds of all who witnessed it.  

Bing and Bart decide to scope out the Jupiter Springs Brewing Company brewery before eventually making their way inside. After luckily getting through a locked door in the interior, they search for any clues hinting at the presence of a bigfoot, living or dead. As the investigators near the loading dock, they almost run into someone coming up the stairs, and he has an eerily familiar face.

It’s the early 1970s. Cryptozoologist Bart Garfinkle and gonzo journalist Bing Kingsley are pulled over by police while driving a brewing company truck, only to find themselves later confronted by a biker gang as well. Something roars from the back of the truck. To find out how they got there, a flashback begins the story at a bowling alley in Jupiter Springs, California.