Good Grief

There is a crisis for young people in our country when it comes to equal access to mental health services. Some of the most traumatized and therefore anxious and depressed young people have little or no access to the services they need. Seeing this disparity, Sean Perry created a coaching program to teach kids and teens how to regulate their toughest emotions and find their ways to the life awaiti...

After any trauma in our lives, there is the possibility that we will, over time, choose to grow from it. One profound way this happens is in our spiritual outlook or belief. Having cancer as a young person, Anthony Maranise experienced just such an effect, leading to a life as a chaplain and Christian scholar. How does he rely on his faith to face the losses, anxieties and fears he confronts? Does...

Annie Mattingley endured what many of us, especially parents, fear most. Her daughter died of an overdose. Nothing could have prepared her for the communication she received from her just weeks after that death. It felt real, as if her daughter had communicated to let her know she was ok, not to worry. Out of this experience, Annie became deeply curious about after death communication. What had ot...

When Norah Casey's husband died after a short illness, she found her way quickly to what she'd learned as a business woman. Taking action gave her a focus and a contrast to her grief and her child's grief. Saying yes to opportunities, even when she didn't know how she would be able to respond to them, brought back her energy and made it possible to create a new life, even while grieving for her hu...

There are few things like losing a parent, even at an older age, suited to generating an inner discussion of loss and mortality. What makes for a good death? How can we contribute to everyone involved feeling good about our death? What are mourners left with when things go wrong or badly? After the death of Lisa Shultz' father, she became immersed in these questions and ultimately wrote a book ful...

When Melissa Lyons embarked on a radical sabbatical she expected a few months to reset and a return to her successful high-powered life. As the time extended, she felt lost, unsure what might happen next, she learned to let time unfold at its own pace. Then one day, at a cafe in Thailand, she realized that a book about loss had spilled out on pages of her journal, setting a new direction for the r...

How does a nurse relate to death. What has she learned by being close to the people who are experiencing the end of life? And how are her personal experiences with death influenced by her professional ones? Acclaimed author Sallie Tisdale gives us a frank and open perspective on death based on all her own experiences and those of her patient. Unsentimental yet deeply human and warm, she helps us e...

The Savages were a happy family with four boys. The older two were 18 and 19, one a year into college and the other just graduating from high school. Then they made a fateful error, mixing prescription drugs with alcohol. In a flash, Nick and Jack were dead, leaving their family in an unimaginable grief. Driven to prevent a similar tragedy in other families, the 525 Foundation was established. Thr...

How can we possibly make sense from the death of a child. For most of us, especially parents, the thought is beyond comprehending, until that child is ours. But recognizing that children do, in fact, die and creating the best possible circumstances for the child and their family is such a departure from the medicalized deaths many families experience. Kathy Hull knows this first hand, because the...

A cancer diagnosis is one of the hardest things we can face. Most of us have very little time to adjust to the profound life experience of cancer before we are immersed in treatment. We look forward to the day when we'll be done. Everyone in our lives, even our health care providers, expect a celebration and profound relief. But what we call survivorship is much more complicated. All the feelings...

In a life filled with learning, searching for meaning and intimately experiencing different parts of the world, Carmen Hartono came to a greater understanding of her spiritual home. How do her beliefs and practices help her, sometimes at the worst of times? When her beloved son died, she had to use all that she knew and learn even more about her beliefs to carry her through. In her book, Chronicle...

How has modern life disconnected us from our wisdom? Anita Sanchez shares the prophecies of indigenous elders who see a path towards reconnection and understanding. Join us to learn how to embody these principles; the power to forgive the unforgivable, the power to heal, the power of unity and the power of hope. These four gifts applied to our problems of living can change the way we operate as a...

How does a successful career in film and television lead to a passion for supporting people to design their deaths? When a temporary pit stop working at a local hospice turned into a 17 year career collecting the stories of dying people, Kimberly Paul was as surprised as anyone. But the loss of her recently ex-boyfriend to cancer (the break-up later revealed as his attempt to protect her from his...

5 nurses who helped veterans at the end of their lives noticed something they came to call soul injury. A result of unspent grief, Shane and guilt, it plagued the men. They decided to devote themselves to sharing the lessons about how to heal soul injury with people who were not veterans and who were not actively dying. Join us to talk with Deborah Grassman, one of the founders, who works to bring...

Daniel Kenner's parents had always been loving, giving people who gave all they had to the world. Their ability to do that declined sharply when his father was diagnosed with dimentia and his mother, shortly after, with cancer. Daniel took every opportunity to support them, but also to ask them questions and hear their stories. Putting his life on hold, as so many caregivers do, he took advantage...

As each year passes there is more and more open discussion about death. This leads naturally to a conscious consideration of how we want to die. Having lived through the difficult hospital deaths (despite preparation and living wills in place) at his two parents, Bart Windrum became committed to defining a gentle and dignified passing. He also became passionate about defining a way to make it more...

When Heidi Connolly's husband died, she faced the prospect of living a very different life, without the support of the person she was closest to. But while she felt the loss keenly, she still felt as if she was communicating with Randy and that he was guiding her towards a very different use of her talents. She had been an editor, bringing other people's words to life. Her talent had often been de...

When she discovered that her daughter was being abused by her ex-husband, Maralee McLean tried everything imaginable to protect her. But she encountered a system unwilling and unable to accept that they were being manipulated. Maralee's pain and anguish and her ultimate ability to face and change the situation fueled a fierce commitment to changing the system that had failed her. Join us to hear t...

Mason Summit's father died when he was only 11. Now 22, how did the loss affect who he has become and how he relates to life? His career as a musician began after his father died, when he felt a strong need to express what he was going through. In being able to express his deepest experiences, he found the solace he needed. And this has led to a passion for both music and expression. Join us when...

How does a life change when the person you're closest to in the world dies? For Paul Linke, that person was his wife and the mother of his three children. When she died of breast cancer at 37, he entered a new landscape. As an actor and writer, the natural outgrowth of his loss and mourning was the creation of a one man show about the loss and his response to it. This then led to continued perform...

AnnE O'Neil buried her grief in alcohol, following the model she witnessed in her family. Only when her life fell apart did she begin to see that she would have to develop a program to stay clean and sober. That would only be possible if she was willing to grieve. When her husband died, this commitment deepened and led to her life's work, to help people heal from grief and addiction, and to see th...

How can we use technology to reduce the isolation and alienation that often comes along with grief? When Kimberly Libertini and Robynne Boyd were facing profound loss, a friend connected them to exchange text messages and support each other through their hardest moments. They were both amazed at how helpful it was, even though they didn't know each other before that. This is the experience that fu...

This week we turn the tables to talk about Good Grief host Cheryl Jones and her novel, An Ocean Between Them. The story is about a mother and her lesbian daughter estranged and alienated. It is also a story of deep redemption and transformation, as they work together to repair what has been broken. Dawn Gross, radio host of Dying to Talk and palliative care physician at UCSF, will turn the tables...

What does it mean to forgive the person who has injured you in your life more than any other? There was no thought of forgiveness when Stephanie Cassatly's mother was murdered before Stephanie had even fully launched into adulthood. It was many years before she considered that it was possible and more years before she realized that she was imprisoned along with the person who killed her mother. Ta...

Alua Arthur was an attorney working with the most difficult problems we could imagine; abuse, poverty and assault. But she had done the work with energy and joy until she suddenly found herself depressed and uninspired, lacking any joy in the work. Knowing she would have to leave the work she had loved, it took some time to find her true life's calling; helping people prepare to die and then accom...