Brenda

Getting Out From Under

Health EN ↓ 6 episodes

This podcast is my story of getting out of an emotionally and financially abusive marriage as an American woman married to a Japanese man living in Japan. When we are subject to abuse, we often feel ashamed, like we are somehow allowing it to happen, or we deserve it. When we bear abuse in silence, we give our abusers the power. I want to tell my stories to let other abused women know they are not alone. I also want to help people with loved ones in abusive relationships understand why it's so hard to "just leave."

Author

Brenda

Episodes

Episode 5 - The Beginning of the End 30.11.2025 22:32

In this episode, I share the turning point that reshaped my marriage and my sense of safety. What began as yet another financial deception escalated into a late-night confrontation in Tokyo—an event that revealed the depth of my husband’s lies and the extent of the trouble he had pulled our family into. From that moment, fear became a constant presence in my life. Instead of feeling supported by m...

Episode 4 - The First Betrayal 13.09.2025 35:56

In this episode, I tell the story of the very first time I felt truly betrayed by my husband and the circumstances of our life at the time that prevented me from leaving. Please feel free to leave me comments here or send me an email at gettingoutbrenda@gmail.com.

Love Knows No Boundaries - Part Two 12.07.2025 13:24

In Part Two of this episode I discuss the first time my boundaries were really tested with my ex-husband, before he was my husband, and how that may have set the course for our entire relationship and marriage. Trigger warning for mentions of suicide and some adult language. Please feel free to leave your comments and questions here or e-mail me at gettingoutbrenda@gmail.com

Love Knows No Boundaries - Part One 23.06.2025 15:33

In Part One of Episode 3, I begin to tell the story of how we met, and how I started to put aside my own needs and wants. The love bombing from my love interest, who I eventually married, seemed like the key to fulfilling my dream of getting married and settling down before I was "too old" and passed some arbitrary past due date that I had set for myself. Trigger warning for mentions of...

Episode 2 - How I Got Here 30.03.2025 20:51

Thank you for joining me again as I tell my story of how I got out of an abusive relationship with a man, who I believe is a narcissist, in a country that is not my own. In this episode, I tell a little bit about my upbringing, and how I became a people pleaser believing that was the only way to be loved. I truly believed, and to some degree I probably still believe, that no one could simply love...

Episode 1 - Why I started this podcast 17.11.2024 14:42

Hello and welcome to Getting Out From Under! I'm so happy to have you here! This episode explains why I started this podcast and what I hope to achieve by publishing a podcast. I am an American woman, who has been living in Japan nearly 30 years. I had a successful career and satisfying social life when I met the man I would marry nearly 20 years ago. I quit my job and moved across the country to...