But You Look So Good

We all grow up absorbing society’s “shoulds”—what success looks like, how much we’re meant to achieve, and even how our bodies should function. But what happens when life doesn’t fit those rules? For many people living with chronic illness, these expectations become not only unrealistic, but harmful. In this episode, we explore the hidden weight of societal expectations and why unlearning them is...

This week, we revisit this episode of But You Look So Good where we explored the complexities of relatability when living with a chronic health condition. While well-meaning friends and family often try to connect, their efforts can sometimes feel dismissive or invalidating—especially when it comes to fatigue. Through personal stories, roleplays, and relatable scenarios, they unpack the stark diff...

Ever caught yourself procrastinating, avoiding, or making choices that don’t serve you — even when you know better? That’s self-sabotage, and it’s far more common than we think. In this episode, Sally and Seona unpack why we get in our own way, what the research says about it, and how chronic health challenges can add extra layers of complexity. Together, they explore practical strategies to recog...

Sally and Seona explore the tricky (and sometimes tormenting) world of decision-making — especially when living with chronic health challenges. From decision fatigue to the regret spiral, they unpack why choices can feel so loaded and share practical ways to take the pressure down a notch. Think: treating decisions as data gathering, leaning into values, and sprinkling in some much-needed self-com...

Ever left a medical appointment and thought, “Wait… what just happened?” You’re not alone. Research shows we forget up to 80% of what doctors tell us (so it’s not just the brain fog talking). In this episode, we’re diving into the art of preparing for medical appointments when you live with a chronic health condition. From writing down your three most important questions, to remembering that yes,...

We hear the word resilience everywhere—but what does it really mean? In this episode, Sally and Seona unpack the myths around resilience and explore how we can actively build it in everyday life, especially when things don’t go to plan. Resilience isn’t about being tough all the time, ignoring pain, or forcing positivity. Instead, it’s about flexibility, connection, and the “ordinary magic” of sma...

Living with a chronic health condition means facing a whole mix of emotions - from hope and positivity to worry and “what ifs.” In this episode of But You Look So Good , psychologists Sally and Seona dive into optimism, pessimism, and the middle ground we like to call optimistic realism . We explore what the research says about how mindset shapes our health, why a little pessimism isn’t always a b...

In this episode of But You Look So Good, psychologists Sally and Seona (who both live with chronic health conditions) explore how music can be a powerful tool for mood regulation and emotional support. From the stadium anthems that give you goosebumps to the songs that make you cry in the car park, we unpack how music affects the brain and why it can be more effective than you might think in shift...

Sally and Seona are having a week off to put the finishing touches on the new course ‘But You’ll Be OK’ (starting on August 22nd - enrol now!), so in this episode of But You Look So Good , we revisit the episode exploring the question we ask ourselves after receiving a chronic illness diagnosis, “Who am I now?”. They share personal experiences, answer listener questions, and provide practical insi...

Why do we feel so guilty for something we didn’t choose? In this episode, we explore the quiet, complicated guilt that often comes with chronic illness—blaming yourself for getting sick, feeling like a burden, or wondering if you’re "sick enough" to deserve support. If guilt has ever whispered, “this is your fault” , you’re not alone. Let’s talk about where that guilt comes from—and how...

In this light-hearted but meaningful 52nd episode, we celebrate one whole year of podcasting with MS, microphones, and a lot of laughter. Join us as we reflect on the surprises, stand-out strategies, and hilarious moments from our first year talking all things psychology and chronic health. We answer some quirky reflection questions, confess what got us through (spoiler: naps and snacks), and ask...

Living with a chronic health condition can feel like a never-ending list of what you can’t do — but what if we shifted the focus to what’s strong in you, not what’s wrong with you? In this week’s episode, psychologists with lived experience Sally and Seona explore the power of identifying your character strengths . They introduce the free VIA Character Strengths Survey and unpack how strengths dif...

In this episode, we explore the complex and often difficult relationship we have with our bodies—especially when living with chronic illness. We dive into the feelings of grief, frustration, and even betrayal that can come with bodily changes, and ask: is it possible to like our bodies again? More importantly, we consider how to become allies rather than enemies to our bodies, acknowledging the ha...

When you live with a chronic health condition, it’s easy to assume every new symptom is “just part of it.” Headache? Must be the usual. Fatigue? Classic Tuesday. But in this episode, we chat about why it’s important not to blame everything on your chronic illness. As two psychologists with lived experience, we’ve both done it—and seen our clients do it too. We talk about tuning into your body, whe...

In this episode, Sally and Seona ask the big question: do we always have to forgive to move on? Spoiler alert - nope! They dive into the messy, very human experiences of being hurt by others (hello, unhelpful doctors and disappearing friends) and explore why forgiveness isn't always the right fit. With warmth and humour, they chat about what healing can look like when forgiveness feels too har...

In this episode of But You Look So Good , we dive into the fascinating world of attachment styles—how they’re formed, how they show up in adult relationships, and how chronic illness can add a whole new layer. We chat about what it’s like navigating connection, vulnerability, and independence when your body doesn’t always cooperate. Whether you lean anxious, avoidant, secure, or somewhere in-betwe...

Worried you’ll be dismissed? Talked over? Told it’s just anxiety again ? You’re not overreacting — you’re navigating a healthcare system that often fails to believe people with chronic conditions. In this episode, Sally and Seona unpack the quiet damage of medical gaslighting and the very real impact of ableism in healthcare. If you've ever second-guessed your symptoms or left an appointment f...

Why is asking for help so hard—even when we desperately need it? In this honest and light-hearted episode, two psychologists with lived experience unpack the emotional knots and social expectations that make help-seeking feel so awkward for people living with chronic health conditions. Through humour, relatable stories, a sprinkle of psychological theory, and a couple of role plays, they explore h...

 “Am I oversharing? Are people sick of hearing about it? Should I just pretend I’m fine?” This week, Sally and Seona unpack the surprisingly loaded question: Do I talk about my chronic health condition too much? If you’ve ever second-guessed yourself mid-sentence or worried you’re becoming “that friend,” this one’s for you. We explore the internal and external pressures to minimise your experience...

Join Sally and Seona, as they dive into the all-too-familiar phrase: “I don’t want to know if I’m getting worse.” In this episode, they explore why so many of us avoid medical tests or dread results — even when we know it might help. Blending warmth, humour, and psychological insight, they unpack the brain’s resistance to bad news, the function of hope, and how the fear of decline can quietly shap...

In this episode, we’re diving deep into the what ifs — those spiralling thoughts that show up when anxiety grabs the mic. From “What if I never get better?” to “What if I lose everything?”, we explore why these stories feel so real, how chronic illness can amplify them, and what it takes to gently challenge the lies anxiety tells us. If you’ve ever found yourself spiralling into the worst-case sce...

In this episode, we dive into the complex, messy, and often exhausting experience of navigating work while living with a chronic health condition. From the invisible weight of fatigue to the emotional toll of deciding whether (or how) to disclose your diagnosis, we explore the unspoken pressures so many of us face. We talk about internalised ableism, the myth of the ideal worker, and what it means...

This week, we’re diving into self-compassion — what it really means, why it’s so hard sometimes, and how it can make a real difference when you’re living with a chronic health condition. Sally and Seona share personal stories, research insights, and simple, practical ways to be a little kinder to yourself (without the eye rolls). If you’ve ever struggled with self-criticism or felt like self-compa...

Psychologists Sally and Seona know how deeply stress impacts chronic illness. In this episode, they explore how it worsens symptoms like inflammation, pain, and fatigue—and why managing it is essential. They walk through four key areas to help lighten the load: daily hassles, ongoing stressors, everyday joys, and having something to look forward to. Blending lived experience with psychological ins...

In this episode of But You Look So Good , Sally and Seona explore how Narrative Therapy can help people with chronic health conditions separate themselves from limiting, all-consuming stories. From labels placed on us to the scripts we internalise, it’s easy to feel stuck. We’ll share how reclaiming your narrative can offer clarity, compassion, and a renewed sense of identity—plus practical tools...