Qualified for Nothing

In this SPOOKY episode of Qualified for Nothing, Hamish and Celaine flip the script from last week's episode and discuss nice GIRLS, Celaine calls Hamish broke and ugly (#true), and Hamish reads manic texts from a girl who is clearly going through something...Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩  ⁠⁠⁠: https://celaine.net/socials.htmlFollow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩  ⁠⁠⁠: https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socia...

In today's episode, Celaine discusses the best way to compensate being short (she's 4'11 btw), Hamish guides you through what life is like constantly talking to walls, and they both start going British...? Follow  @CelainesASMR  : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmr Follow  @memefarmerhamish  ⁠⁠⁠: https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socials Got a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on?...

In this week's episode of Qualified for Nothing, we've all finally returned from our trips (yes, all of us, totally) and we're here to discuss the things that we're perfectly unqualified for, such as Kim teaching you how to break up with your boyfriend by calling him another name for a cat, Celaine runs us through why you should NOT stalk your coworker and Hamish discusses his inte...

In today's trainwreck, the Qualified for Nothing gang attempt to discuss the best acts of petty revenge. Hamish explains that you should train bees to attack your neighbors when they're being too noisy, Celaine talks about what it's like to be banned from DoorDash (she has a private chef so it doesn't matter anyway), and Kim tries her best not to fall asleep mid recording. She also...

In this week's episode of our beloved advice podcast, Qualified for Nothing, Hamish has his hygiene insulted by a co-host, not naming names or anything but it rhymes with Jim (Hamish smells amazing btw), Celaine tells you to send your roommate to the streets if they're complaining about the temperature and Kim tries to explain the American power system by describing a light switch for the...

Holy 20th episode, Batman! Can you believe it? We made it to 20 whole episodes! In this episode, the gang lose their minds slowly (it gets worse over the next few weeks #spoilers), Kim tells us about the time she reported a coworker for smoking crack on the job, Celaine tells us that you probably shouldn't leave your kids unattended with a stranger, and Hamish explains that being a cheapskate...

In this episode of Qualified for Nothing, the gang answer your stupid questions YET again! Kim gives us her stance on whether or not you should wait for other people to begin eating at the dinner table, Hamish tells us about the time he saw someone at the urinal with his pants around his ankles and Celaine proposes we do an ancestry test to find out if we're all related. Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR...

In this week's episode, Kim discusses the ethics behind sending people to prison for being too stupid, Hamish plots to destroy the Homeowner's Association (QFN does not associate with those statements), and Celaine talks about how to turn your local Social Security Office into a fun LEGO set! Fun QFN fact of the day: Did you know that Kim is allergic to her own dog? Like, imagine being all...

In this week's episode, Hamish explains the best way for your brother's wife (and probably you) to become an international threat is to frame her for the No-Fly List, Celaine finds out the REAL reason Kim isn't allowed to have a dog (don't tell her actual dog), and Kim explains to us the phenomenon that is the weather that turns you gay (after your boyfriend calls you mommy?). Guys...

In this week's episode of Qualified for Nothing, Hamish teaches you how to safely leave your kids at home while you go to work or Egypt or something, Celaine discusses the ethics of having beef with a 13 year old, and Kim forgets the name of the podcast yet again, despite us being 16 episodes in. You'd think she'd know it by now, huh? Celaine likes feet btw Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩  : h...

In this week's episode of Qualified for Nothing, these three ADHD-riddled goofs fail to stay on topic answering your stupid questions. Kim wouldn't let us call this episode "The Piss Episode" so we had to make do. (hi chat btw) Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩  : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  ⁨@idakim⁩  : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩  ⁠⁠⁠: https://memefarmer...

In this week's trainwreck, Kim tells us that you should find a way to get rid of your sister-in-law's kid before he inevitably grows up to become a serial killer, Hamish explains that the world's gayest straight man is probably just refusing to come out of the closet, and Celaine attempts to discuss preventing a daughter from going to the funeral of her dead friend while the other two...

In today's episode of Qualified for Nothing, three childless friends rant and rave and, despite their tangents, tell you, dear audience member, that the worst way to mother a child is to get inappropriately close with your son. Which you probably didn't need our help to work out. Follow  @CelainesASMR  ⁠⁠⁠: https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  @idakim  : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  @m...

In this week's episode of Qualified for Nothing, despite what they say, Kim and Celaine don't get married (yet), but instead Celaine talks about the dangers of not inviting someone you've never met to the wedding you didn't even want, Kim tells us that the worst way to get people to buy you gifts on your registry is to invite your entire Facebook friends list, and Hamish encourages...

This week on Qualified for Nothing, Hamish thinks you should teach your 11 month old baby how to count cards and gamble instead of sitting them in front of Cocomelon, Kim thinks you should probably stop having parents if they use AI for therapy, and Celaine explains that the best way to punish a cheese stealing child is to remove their doors (or shrimp 'em).Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩  : https://l...

In the 10th episode of Qualified for Nothing, the world's greatest* advice podcast, Kim tells us that you should treat your husband to a day off with all of the stresses that childbirth puts a man through, Celaine debates whether it's a good idea to leave your disabled partner, and Hamish tells you that you should probably help out your homeless friend. Or don't. What do we know? We&#3...

Kim explains what happens when your wife gets uninvited from your friend's wedding, Hamish finds out that Santa isn't real, and Celaine tells us the consequences of boiling your friends in your truck (while Hamish teaches you how to siphon gas) Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩  : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  ⁨@idakim⁩  : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩  : https://memefa...

Kim discusses what life would be like with Jeffery Dahmer, Celaine teaches us the best way to ruin a date is by pooping in a urinal and Hamish explains the one time he was a catfish. Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩  ⁠⁠⁠: https://linktr.ee/celainesasmr Follow  ⁨@idakim⁩  : https://idakim.carrd.co/ Follow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩  ⁠⁠: https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socials Got a problem you want our (un)qua...

Kim discusses why you shouldn't propose to your partner three times in one night, Hamish teaches you how to send 1000 ladybugs in the mail (you can really do that) and Celaine informs the masses on how to successfully stink out a room. Follow ⁠⁠ @CelainesASMR ⁠⁠ : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmr Follow ⁠⁠ @idakim ⁠⁠ : https://idakim.carrd.co/ Follow ⁠⁠ @memefarmerhamish ⁠⁠ : https://memefarmerh...

Celaine teaches us the best way to become Portuguese, Kim discusses the best way to avoid listening to smut in your car and Hamish debates the ethics of saving people from drowning. Follow ⁠ @CelainesASMR ⁠ : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmr Follow ⁠ @idakim ⁠ : https://idakim.carrd.co/ Follow ⁠ @memefarmerhamish ⁠ : https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socials Got a problem you want our (un)qualified...

Celaine tells us a story about bean-addicted Jim, Kim explains the best way to deal with a scummy ex-roommate who just won't leave you alone, and Hamish asks the gang their stance on AI partners. Follow  @CelainesASMR  : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  @idakim  : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  @memefarmerhamish  : https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socialsGot a problem you want our (un)...

Hamish tells the story of someone fawning for a cheater, Kim discusses divorce with kids, and Celaine dives deep into an affair via takeout (while Hamish teaches you how to frame your cheating partner - but we don't talk about that part). Got a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

Kim tells us about her plans for wedding fish, Hamish explains the best way to re-plan a vacation you didn't cancel, and Celaine shocks us with the worst wedding planner. Got a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

The gang become bar-certified* lawyers. Kim explains a financially sham marriage, Hamish discusses the effects of bees trespassing on your property and Celaine teaches you how to safely avoid paying your taxes! *no they don't Got a story you want us to give our unqualified advice on? Head to ⁠https://qualifiedfornothing.com

In this episode Celaine, Kim and Hamish dive into Reddit stories and discuss a wedding ruined by a well-kept secret, a wife's mistaken identity and a fake baby. Got a story you want us to give our unqualified advice on? Head to https://qualifiedfornothing.com