Exposing Isolation

In this episode I talk a bit about what I am coming to learn to be a manic phase. I also update a bit about my new doctor and what went wrong when I went on a supplement that I didn't need.  Episode Brought By - BeScentFree.com

Today I talk about meeting with my new naturopathic doctor for the first time and really loving it. 

This is a pretty heavy, but also just informative episode about my struggle with suicidal ideation and how I have a new therapist who asks every session about it. In the past, it wasn't asked and I didn't tell people. Now I know that it is a common symptom of a few of my conditions.  Episode Brought By - BeScentFree.com

On today's episode I talk about meeting my new therapist and how I am feeling about all the changes afoot. 

Until yesterday, Liz was my therapist. She went into labor really early, cutting off our sessions weeks before we expected. I talked to her every week for the past 16 months and she's really been my rock. We didn't get the chance to wrap anything up, nothing to keeping me going into the future. So, I'm left feeling grateful for her help, concerned about her wellbeing and in essence lost for what t...

For sake of science, I thought it was important to note how I am feeling some hours after waking up today. Still mentally better than usual, but physically I'm really starting to go through it. Delayed reaction is even weirder than immediately getting triggered.  Sponsored by Tending Trauma and BeScentFree.com

Today I am pleased with my stable mood. I had a filling replaced yesterday and while the results seem okay, the woman who installed the new one was very scented. On top of that they filling somehow didn't address my entire issue with the tooth. My optimism today is that even though I was exposed and stressed, I don't feel as bad today as I would have going through similar experiences in the past....

Today I feel really good. Like REALLY good and there are a bunch of reasons why. In this episode I share some of my thoughts and generally just give an upbeat update which is super rare for me. Cheers! Sponsored by Tending Trauma and BeScentFree.com

Post-therapy pre-Thanksgiving musings.

This week I went to look at a house for sale and mostly just ended up learning what I don't want, but enjoyed the drive with Thomas. I don't think I did a very good job explaining what I am trying next, but that's just as well because I can't say I really know. Things aren't necessarily looking up but I am choosing to believe something will work. 

What else can I say?

I was up a lot in the night essentially learning more about myself and not really liking what I saw. Today I begin to get to the bottom of why I focus so much on the bad and can't seem to find the good that often. I know I can change my mindset once I identify what is happening that doesn't serve me.  #Sponsor - Brought to You By the Tending Trauma Podcast

In this episode I talk more about my current mental state and how I keep being triggered into "dissociative shutdowns", which in the episode I simply refer to as going unconscious for short amounts of time. This is possibly linked to a "freeze" style fear response, but could be something else. We are trying to keep me safe and protected! More about "dissociative shutdowns" from psychotherapynetwor...

Today I am in a new mindset, a new perspective. I want to know what would happen if I put more energy into being my authentic self and less energy into finding my place in the existing systems available to me. It isn't always fun and rarely easy to be me and I think that avoiding doing so has been quite appealing up until now. I'm glad to have support in this.  Brought to You By - BeScentFree...

Today I am shutting down because I am safe. This is a common phenomenon for me and can be a good sign if the safety lasts, but I still down know why it happens exactly or I should say, I don't totally understand the science. I'll keep you posted.  Brought to You By - BeScentFree.com and Thomas F. Webber Coaching

On today's episode I discuss where the nation is at after Joe Biden and Kamala Harris' win on Saturday as well as update y'all on the current state of my mental health. Everything feels raw, but promising and that is a lot better than not.  Brought to You By - BeScentFree.com and Thomas F. Webber Coaching

On today's episode I discuss the start of my commitment to finding a sensible treatment plan for CPTSD. My husband Thomas is working alongside me on this one. He is working from a clinical perspective and I am working from a socio-cultural perspective. We both have CPTSD and struggle to be people because of it.  Live Research - Parts One & Two

I apologize for the poor audio quality in this episode but I think the message is lovely all the same! I am sitting in the last light of the full moon, early in the morning on this Halloween, releasing that which no longer serves me. Blessings to you!

So currently when I stop and think about my life I start to panic. Sometimes I would describe it as terror. Anyone else experiencing this? Today I go over my story a bit and confess where I'm at. RebeccaEWebber@gmail.com

I felt the need to record a follow up from last week's episode. Things are developing and I feel so much love, it's worth documenting!

Today was already such a doozy I couldn't not make an episode. Mostly I'm talking housing struggles and being real with my family about my pain. Thank you to the Youper App for getting me through my fear. 

Yesterday after a bit of research I learned that I have nearly all the symptoms of PMDD! Not that it's good to have PMDD, I'm excited because it's an answer and something I can work to treat. It's a good day. 

Here I go again being overly insightful while still not knowing what to do. The joys of mental and physical illness that has no answers and an insufficient support system. I feel like a brilliant cave hag with no power. 

Hello Humans! This morning Thomas was generous with his time and facilitated a very long (100 min) parts work session for me so that I might reconnect with my exiled younger self, namely the 4 year old.  It was one of the more transformative therapeutic experiences I've had thus far! To watch the full session - Parts Work by Thomas F. Webber | Inner Child Reintegration To connect with Thomas...

In part one I discussed my story up until going to college. In this episode I talk about the beginning of college until now. I am documenting these hard truths to simply not have to hold onto them alone anymore. Also to acknowledge myself where no one else has seen my truth.  Please consider supporting my work! Become a Patron Make a Donation