HARKpodcast

Hey there, sport. (t urns chair backward ) We know this podcast usually makes a lot of jokes and goofs about marijuana. But here in episode 420, we want to get real with you. ( turns hat backward) Don't do a drug. And don't just take it from us -- we've got two anti-drug Christmas songs to help you kick that green. "Santa Doesn't Cop Out On Dope" by Martin Mull is a simple little tune(/skit) about...

Lots of things are other things in this episode: the 60s are the 90s, Nashville is Paris, children are women. And freezing time? You better believe that's doing crime. What does any of that have to do with rockabilly? Tune in to find out, I guess! By request, we listen to "Sleighbell Rock" by Chuck Blevins and "Rock'N Roll Santa" by Little Joey Farr. Thank you to Charles for these requests!

I know last episode was our back-to-school special, but don't take off your thinking caps just yet, because we're not done learning. This time, we're getting some international perspective with two C-Pop holiday song requests! We start with an upbeat New Year's song, "新年快乐 (Happy New Year)" by 小虎队 (Little Tigers) and 忧欢派对 (we're going with Sad Happy Party). Then brace for a mood shift w...

Hey, does this episode have a vibe? Can you tell it's 9pm? And on a school night?? Join us to prepare for a return to school AND the return of Rosh Hashanah with some educational-adjacent Hanukkah songs! "I Got a Harmonica for Hanukkah" by Ella Jenkins educates us about income disparity and also the blues, while "Hanukkah's Not Just For Kids" by the Macaroons educates us about different family str...

It's another AGROBAR episode, and we're taking this beloved classic international! Sort of! Technically! Our first sort-of-technically international GGROBAR version is by celebrated Canadian band The Irish Rovers, followed by a not-really-international-but-at-least-multilingual rendition performed by Juan Carlos Guerrero and Dr. Elmo himself! This week's ranking music is, of course, "Everything Su...

Like a werewolf helplessly transforming into its beastial form, our podcast once again becomes all Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer, all August long! Come howl along with us as we listen to two tales of revenge. "Grandpa Got Revenge On a Reindeer" by Luke McKinney gets a lot of respect, even if it's moreso for the things it's not rather than the thing it is. Then "Grandpa Run Over the Reindeer"...

We're BACK... and this time? It's BIRTHONAL. In other words, it's Ian's Birthday Boy's Choice! He curates a romantic indie music Christmas in July for us with "December, forever" by Big Society, followed by "This Sky" by perennial Hark favorites, Christmas Aguilera. What a sweetie!! The ranking music in this episode is "Christmas in the Room" by Sufjan Stevens.

Since we'll be away from the podcast until July 22, we've got some songs specifically to hold you over until then! For the rest of the month, we hope that "Christmas in June" by AJR will satisfy your holiday music appetite - hopefully more than its protagonist satisfied his partner, hey-oh!! And then to help you get through next month, we get more heartfelt (and also gay) (and also Grinch) with "C...

Despite our best efforts, the World Cup is happening again, and it's happening here. Though we were able to put it off for 400+ episodes, it's finally time for us to do some winter holiday songs about the so-called beautiful game. Ian, in particular, has a lot of say. First up, we hear "Three Lions (It's Coming Home for Christmas)" by Baddiel, Skinner and the Lightning Seeds, a 2022 holiday versio...

It's almost Pride Month and we're getting ready with some queer (or at least queer-adjacent) holiday songs! By request, we're listening to Girl in Red's "Two Queens in a King Sized Bed", a Christmas song featuring sapphic love and potential body horror, followed by "Happy Hanukkah (Will We Still Be Friends)" by Philip Labes, a Hanukkah song featuring theatre kids and a brief digression into Clinto...

Since we're away this week, we pre-recorded this episode! Appropriately, the theme of the requested songs is travel, and in particular, travel gone wrong at the holidays. Or maybe just being stuck in a place during Christmas? But not like a place-place, like, a liminal place. Airports, ships at sea, that kind of thing. Which is to say: exactly and exclusively like those two things. "Christmas at t...

In honour of International Workers' Day on May 1st, we're listening to two songs about the plight of those who have to work on Christmas Day. First up is an epic song about an achingly mundane world. Specifically, Seattle in the 1990s: it's "Sometimes You Have to Work on Christmas (Sometimes)" by Harvey Danger. Then we earn some overtime with Modern Modem's retail-centric "Working on Christmas". T...

It's April, all. And I know you depend on us, annually, to deliver only the best winter holiday songs about marijuana. Well, good news: we have not let you down. So grab some cookies, sit back, relax, and partake with us in "Cookie Doe" by Sly Til I Die featuring Woe and "Smoked Out Santa" by Big Freedia. The ranking music in this episode is "Make It Jingle" by Big Freedia.

Just in time for Easter, we're covering two Christmas songs that are, uh, maybe kind of appropriate? The first song is about death, but also kind of about everlasting life: "I'm Spending Christmas with Jesus This Year" by Brenda Ontko Boulton. The second song is about... well, birth on one level, and condoms on a much more literal level. It's "Condoms for Christmas" by Milo Bobbins and the Budget...

As the vernal equinox approaches in our hemisphere, we are saying goodbye to winter with two snow-themed songs! First, by listener request, we hear "50 Words for Snow" by Kate Bush -- a real arthouse-film of a song, complete with a beloved celebrity there to impart gravitas. We pair it with "Snobows" by Stan Beard and the Swinging Strings, which we are disappointed to report is NOT about the elbow...

Inspired by the approaching time change, we spring forward into two songs about winter sunlight and, specifically, Seasonal Affective Disorder. We expect a spooky twist from Lemon Demon's "SAD", but it mostly does what's written on the tin. There's also a literal story of SAD in Sunturns' "First Winter", but with layers of meaning and metaphor that give it the vibrancy of a sunrise. The ranking mu...

ERROR: WE RECORDED AFTER 8PM CAUTION: Only listen to year-round holiday podcasts from people you trust. Ian and Jam listened to two versions of a song called "S.A.N.T.A. Dot Com". Do you wish to proceed? DETAILS: The ranking music in this episode is "I'm Gonna E-Mail Santa" by Billy Gilman.

It's almost Family Day here in British Columbia, and to celebrate, we've got a tenuously connected episode theme! By request, we listen to "Christmas Must Be Tonight" as performed by SCALA and Kolacny Brothers, a song about the son of a carpenter. Then we pair it with "Let's Make a Baby King" by Wynnona Judd, a song about that same guy and also his mom and also his cousin, and also maybe the conce...

Of course we wouldn't let January pass us by without celebrating our second-most-cursed annual tradition, Grinch Rap Granuary! But, unfortunately, this is the last one. For real this time. We're scraping the bottom of the Grinch Rap barrel with "Like The Grinch" by Gucci Mane, so hopefully "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" by Pentatonix will be the stake in the heart that this thing requires. RIP Gr...

As the twelve days of Christmas come to a close once again, we're celebrating Epiphany with two songs about three men. By listener request, we check out "We Three Slow Kings" by Electric Santa, a song that may or may not be a joke, and "If I Were a Wise Man" by Flannel Graph, an undoubtedly sincere song with a familiar Sufjan-esque flavor. The ranking music in this episode is "Pocketful of Sunshin...

In this milestone episode, Jam and Ian add the 799th (???) and 800th (!!!) songs to HARK's massive, unruly list. Jam aims for the top of the list with a near-classic and the hosts talk about Jesus for a while, with just a liiiittle heresy (as a treat).  Then Ian uses his bottom pick to launch an exploratory mission into a new kind of bad song and raise some philosophical questions about the future...

Hanukkah is fast approaching! And to celebrate, we have two songs... well, OK. We have one song about Hanukkah, and one song about Not Christmas. "Chanukah in West Virginia" by Scott Simons wraps a somewhat sad sentiment in a cheerful package (for better or worse), while "Chinese Food on Christmas" by Brandon Walker is a thoroughly silly celebration of not celebrating. The ranking music in this ep...

You may be wondering why this episode is going up on a Thursday instead of a Wednesday. Well, first of all, it's technically still Wednesday in our time zone, and this episode is all about going local! And second... we are adjacent to the ball. In this episode, we're encouraging you to shop local, support Wikipedia, and listen along with us to two holiday-sweater-themed songs: "Ugly Xmas Sweater P...

It's Jam's birthday! To find out the first song they selected, go to Paragraph 2 (P2). To skip ahead to the ranking music, go to P5. P2: It was "Yule Shoot Your Eye Out" by Fall Out Boy! For their second selection, they give Ian two options -- past or future. If you think he should choose "future", go to P3. If you prefer "past", go to P4. P3: Ian chose the same thing! And the song was, unfortunat...

It's that time again! Gut that pumpkin and fill it with eggnog, because we're listening to EVEN MORE Christmas/Halloween crossover songs. Not only have we not run out of these, we've still got a few that are, you know, not terrible! We start with "Spooky Halloween Chrismtas" by Giftshop and have to re-learn what psychobilly is, then get into a more familiar groove with "Halloween on Christmas" by...