Fortune Kit

Sean Diddy Combs is getting Hennessy, nudes, and Chinese-style massages in prison. Plus, there should have been an episode of Home Improvement where Tim Allen helps the Grateful Dead fix the Wall of Sound. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Brother John's new material still goes, Paul McCartney's new kids movie probably goes, and Lil Boosie's new A.I.-powered website posits that the rap game should feel more like dealing with your health insurance provider. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Charles and Alex watch the era-defining tour documentary Soulja Boy the Movie 2011, unearthed from an old hard drive. Full episode on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/fortunekit/posts/320-soulja-boy-171248303

We take an exhaustive look at everything the Beatles ever ate: horse steaks, cornflakes, fish and chips in newspaper, chicken maryland, Heinz baked beans, authentic Italian spaghetti, and "home-cooked food." Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Gene Simmons hawks sodas, Meek Mill misses Lion King and Sega, and Peter Griffin is lowkey stupid but a better father to his children than Elon Musk. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

A Good Charlotte fan steals an ambulance with a patient in the back and slams it into a wall… Is this viral marketing for GTA6? Plus George Harrison's love of Austin Powers and a new nepo baby stage at Reading and Leeds. Full episode on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/fortunekit/posts/317-lifestyles-168613101

Josiah helps us make sense of MGK's career trajectory and BluntMan gets arrested for having blunts. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Pat McAfee drops some slop, Frankie Valli retires and un-retires, and the Beatles movies dramatize the lads walking across a damn street. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

In the Sopranos finale, A.J. used the Death Note to kill Tony and then MGK rapped about it. Meanwhile artists from Motley Crue to Tyga are embracing the wonders of A.I. slop. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Festivalgoers are passing around Katy Perry and a box/bag of piss. Sesame Street has a new Chappell Roan parody that can help adult music fans understand when they need to use the bathroom. Boy George, the self-appointed King of the Jews, is opposed by a man named Pontius. Full episode on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/fortunekit/posts/313-portal-potty-166040640

All of the latest stories in music are about pissing and shitting and farting. There's just no getting around it. Also The Hague is having a Shrek Rave, possibly to lure Netanyahu to the ICC with the type of lame rave Zionists love. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Muppets are predisposed to be bad musicians (not enough fingers) and waterpark line-skipper Boosie tried to buy a Trump pardon from Jacob Wohl. Correction: We offhandedly said Booise wore matching outfits with Diddy but that was Meek Mill. Fortune Kit regrets this error. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

AI chatbots are gifted kids, Taylor Swift is a quasi-cheerleader, and Morrissey has relentlessly faced the slings and arrows of the most vile of the devil's snares. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song "Sugar We All End Up in Diapers" (from Podcast About List): www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aOQ7h9S4kI Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

The tragic and unforeseeable divorce of Jelly Roll and Bunnie XO is undercut by juvenile stories about stage pooping and crowd pooping. Full episode on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/fortunekit/posts/309-dumb-podcast-162802639 Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song "Sugar We All End Up in Diapers" (from Podcast About List): www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aOQ7h9S4...

The moral of this story is… If you have mental health issues, if you're depressed, if you feel disconnected from other people, just post on Discord. It's where the most normal people are. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song "Sugar We All End Up in Diapers" (from Podcast About List): www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aOQ7h9S4kI Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/H...

Female jinns, Gandhi lasagna, white walls, 2.3 trillion galaxies, and the drug you've never heard of. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song "Sugar We All End Up in Diapers" (from Podcast About List): www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aOQ7h9S4kI Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Hesse and Raina join us for a spiritual journey into rooms where Garfield went corporate and money was implied. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song "Sugar We All End Up in Diapers" (from Podcast About List): www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aOQ7h9S4kI Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Garfield wants to be Muslim, C+C Music Factory wants to perform for Genghis Khan, and Matt Walsh wants more conservative music even though he's a damn hipster like JD Vance. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song "Sugar We All End Up in Diapers" (from Podcast About List): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aOQ7h9S4kI Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

The vulnerable narcissist. The shaved GOAT. The Zionist hologram. All this and more on today's Fortune Kit. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

The Blue Wiggle tries to beef with Oasis and the Washington Post pivots to the least successful ragebait of all time. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Metallica has a whiskey that they blast with their own music to bring out the flavors more better. Soulja Boy has a brand new social media site that looks like 2007. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5xLRYY_7rs Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Recreate Jimi Hendrix's Last Meal Using This Canned Pantry Staple! Nobody Expected Fast Food to Be This Interesting in 2026! Full episode on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/posts/301-dont-you-2nd-157080063

John Semley talks with Charles about his viral Geese article for Wired and why your favorite band is not actually a psyop. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song: www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YN7bJcchAY Join the Discord: discord.com/invite/HabqgJf

Alex doesn't want Soulja Boy to get his penis burned by a hot baked potato. Pokemon cards should be currency in prison. Denzel Curry thinks aliens fuck with his music but realistically, there's a good chance that the first song aliens hear from humans will be A.I. generated. Subscribe to Fortune Kit on Patreon: www.patreon.com/c/fortunekit Ending song: www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YN7bJcchAY Join the...

Bob Dylan starts an AI slop Patreon and a Charlie Daniels hologram is set to play a Tennessee military base. Maybe Sharon Osbourne should make an Ozzy hologram that performs at Zionist events. Full episode on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/posts/154617893/