Your Other Family

We finish our SPANNING THE SPECTRUM sexuality series by learning more of Tom’s story as Erin returns to take over hosting duties! Tom shares a new term he’s still feeling out for himself: androsexual, or an attraction to masculinity. He shares about his attraction for mostly straight men, going all the way back to another boy in first grade. He also discusses being on the asexual spectrum and the...

Erin returns to help us SPAN THE SPECTRUM of our community from a woman's perspective! She updates us on her developments with Your Other Sisters, including a pivotal experience at Revoice this summer where she met some prospective YOS members as well as fellow YOB members for the first time. Sexuality aside, Erin discusses a general resonance with queer culture and then explains how her sexuality...

Matt makes his first appearance on the podcast after writing a couple guest blogs for us! He currently serves on YOB's leadership team and is, in his own words: "just a plain old gay." He's been active in the YOB community for years, but why did it take so long for him to share his story publicly? He opens up about his long road of coming out to himself before he could ever come out to other peopl...

Jesse of the great City of Oaks returns to discuss his sexuality as someone on the asexual (ace) spectrum, identifying as demisexual: someone who only develops sexual feelings when a strong emotional bond is also present. He goes into the difficulties of growing up different in a sexually charged culture, as well as the blessings of being a source of safety with his guy friends. We also dive into...

Keegan returns to the podcast after two and a half years to give another perspective on bisexuality in this SPANNING THE SPECTRUM sexuality series. He shares what resonated with Alex's bi episode, like the concept of "bi panic," along with how he contrasted with the conversation as well, such as feeling like a "minority of a minority" in our YOB community. He tells his story of coming to grips wit...

We continue SPANNING THE SPECTRUM of sexual identity in our community as first-time guest Adam opens up about being cross-oriented: physically and sexually attracted to men, and romantically and emotionally attracted to women. He also describes this orientation as "heteroromantic homosexual." We dive into the nuance of his unique orientation: why Adam doesn't identify as bisexual, and why Adam ste...

Ben joins Tom in-studio for a conversation on his sexual identity as we continue "Spanning the Spectrum" this summer. Ben shares about being married to his best friend, a woman, for the last 15 years and why he opts for queer over bi as his primary identifier. He discloses some of the challenges in this identification as he explains (or defends) himself with certain Christians. He also reveals the...

Alex returns to discuss his sexual identity as a bisexual Christian in this "Spanning the Spectrum" ConvoCast series! Alex answers whether he's felt like a "minority of a minority" in our YOB community, and he shares his long journey coming to terms with his bisexuality -- both with himself and the Holy Spirit. He dispels the myth that he and all other bi people are 50-50 attracted both to men and...

Marshall joins us as another "OG" contributor and cofounder of YOB to share his perspective on this "Spanning the Spectrum" sexual identity series. He shares why he doesn’t identify as gay or SSA despite only experiencing attraction for men. He also discusses a marriage conversation he once had with a woman he dated. He shares the time of his life that presented his greatest struggles with gay tem...

We kick off a new summer ConvoCast series exploring the diverse sexual identifications within our YOB community. We start with Matthew who identifies as gay and Christian, but not those two identities together. He tells of his journey from "SSA" to gay and how he recently experienced feelings for a girl for the first time in his life. He shares about going to a source outside the Church to learn w...

We conclude our 7-values series by exploring our other "ship" of discipleship! How do we define this spiritual term? Is discipleship meant only for our own growth, or is our discipleship also for the people around us? How organized or structured must discipleship of believers look? And how have we felt disqualified from discipling others in their walks with Jesus because of our sexuality? LINKS FR...

Once upon a time, Your Other Brothers held to the value of brotherhood! But we've since shifted this value to one of kinship. Why the change? What does kinship evoke, both for this life and the next, and how do we build or "practice" this value of kinship? When have we felt that sense of belonging outside our blood family, and when have we felt the opposite with our sexuality and masculinity, as s...

How do we walk with integrity as Side B people? Must it include a wide-scale coming out, an authenticity of the external matching our internal selves? Which experiences have defined our convictions and courage to follow Jesus as we’re doing? Join Tom, Aaron, and Will for this discussion on YOB’s fifth value, including the origin stories of incorporating more Jesus into our content as well as deter...

Vulnerability is uncomfortable, even scary, so why do we value it so highly in our community? Sharing our story, including our sexuality, may have once felt like the most daunting or impossible task. And yet what would have been the cost to our lives had we not been vulnerable? What if we had stayed silent, closeted, cut off from such a significant aspect of ourselves with ourselves, God, and othe...

Adam (later known as Dawson in future episode appearances) returns to discuss another of his (and Tom's) greatest loves: Survivor! We share our origin stories with this beloved reality show that's been airing since 2000. We spend the bulk of the episode pondering why Survivor has attracted a strong LGBTQ following over the years. Why do queer people love the show, and why do queer contestants gene...

Joy and sorrow share a tenuous connection. We explore the presence of joy in our YOB community and why it wasn’t one of our original values. We bask in the joy of retreats past and explore the joy to be found in our lives and sexualities, looking to Jesus’ example as he took the cup from his Father, following the joy set before him. Join Tom, Ryan, and Will for their first joyful episode together!...

Marshall missed his first YOB retreat last fall due to his job, and Tom thinks it's a hate crime! Tom responds to Marshall's latest YOB blog about his straight male friends who have endured beyond their marriages to women. Marshall shares about the feelings he recently fielded watching housemate James get married, as well as catching up with old friend Ben who has a child now. Marshall also dishes...

Tom's other brother (and yours), Andy Zuniga, returns to preview this year's Super Bowl – featuring his beloved Philadelphia Eagles! And also the Kansas City Chiefs. Andy gives you his top storylines for the football-illiterate to look out for in this year's big game, including the first-ever matchup of BROTHERS. He also gives you advice how to support your straight friend if his team loses. We di...

YOB's second value of humility follows on the heels of hope: a lowly acorn under a star in the night sky. A place of patience and constant surrender as we wait and trust for a greater story beyond anything we could write for ourselves. Join Tom, Ben, and Will for a discussion of what humility is and what humility isn't; of pride, shame, self-deprecation, and more competing terms. Plus, we callback...

Tom welcomes our first woman to the ConvoCast – an in-studio guest, no less! We’ve been talking with Erin for almost a year now about the prospect of starting a Your Other Sisters community. Today we finally introduce her to our listening audience as we reference her recent blog on YOB’s impact on her life! We also give a shout-out to Matt as the only other fellow indigenous person on this podcast...

We kick off a new year and a new era of YOB with an examination of YOB’s seven values! Starting with HOPE. Tom is joined by Ryan and Aaron to discuss the highs of hope and the lows of despair across the arenas of our masculinity, sexuality, and faith. Where has hoping in something or someone failed us? Where have we felt hope creep into entitlement? As sexual minorities where do we put our hope on...

Our holiday hiatus ends, and the new year begins with returning guest and community member, Adam (later known as Dawson in future episode appearances). Dawson joins Tom to talk about staying positive in this Side B life as we learn more of his story. We explore our top strengths from Strengths Finder and recount some of our favorite retreat moments this past fall. Dawson also shares what he's exci...

Tom welcomes back fellow FOUR-TIME retreat-goer Eugene to recap our recently held YOBBERS retreat. Eugene shares a glimpse into his artist’s process handling retreat decor like glow-in-the-dark nametags and tribe stones, which turned out a tad slimier and stickier this year. Our tribe times were the favorite block of the retreat this year, from heartfelt discussions to the new silly photo contest!...

After six years we finally arrive at our 100th YOBcast episode! Tom is joined alongside a super-sized cast of Ryan, Aaron, Ben, and Will to commemorate the occasion, recounting favorite jokes, guests, topics, and moments together from the last 100 episodes. We also hear from a slew of listeners (including our favorite guest) and respond to all the feedback! Here's to 100 more, fellow sparrows. Cou...

We're back to finish discussing this wonderful world of Side B resources, this time with Tom, Ben, and Will! Ben and Will share their first exposure to Side B resources as we recap some resources mentioned from Part 1, then jump to more of our favorite ones. Check the list below for links to each of the resources referenced in this episode! Our 100th YOBcast is coming soon, and we'd love to hear f...