Your Other Family

We're back! Daniel joins Tom to recap this year's YOBBERS Retreat. As a newer member of YOB leadership, how did Daniel enjoy this retreat compared to others? We reflect on this distinction of leadership and participation with our retreat, including the challenge of not just serving a role or a function all weekend long. We also dive into our retreat's first-time art piece -- a locked birdcage with...

Dawson returns to help us close our At Home series! Tom takes the show on the road to Athens, Georgia, where he once lived for 11 years, to share an in-person conversation with Dawson, who has lived in this city for all 31 of his years. Why did Tom leave home all those years ago, and why has Dawson stayed? Has this same city been a consistent refuge for Dawson, or have there been some darker times...

Simon joins Tom to share their experiences of living alone for these last several years! Has it been an independent person's paradise, or have there also been emotional difficulties? How did the pandemic impact living alone? Simon also shares his experience of growing up with a twin brother, in addition to living previously with female friends, including the challenges of perception amongst any Ch...

Ryan makes his podcast debut as our first native Canadian on the show! He shares his unique living situation, splitting time in the big city and also a small town living in a house with his younger brother. Both Ryan and his brother are single men in their forties -- Ryan, queer; his brother, straight. How did this living situation in a faraway town come to be? Ryan tells us the story about "takin...

Newcomer to the podcast but not to our community, longtime member Matt shares about his life in a celibate partnership with another man. He talks about splitting time in two locations to be close to his parents as well as his partner, with whom he co-owns a house. He shares openly how there was never any sort of road map to this particular kind of "Side B" journey, connecting with some other celib...

Nhat makes his debut appearance! We celebrate his 1-year YOBiversary as he tells us his “at home” story of being married to his wife of the last four years. He shares the challenges of merging his wife’s family dynamic and his own into one new family and home, as well as the joys of complimenting one another and yearning for a better home together. We also dive into Nhat’s childhood as a “PK” or p...

Harrison returns to discuss his societally common but YOB-ly uncommon home life: a wife and three kids! He shares the joys of noise in his home, as well as the challenges of wondering whether he measures up as a dad. We learn about the farm where he grew up, including the literal closet that was once his refuge. Harrison shares vulnerably about his struggles to feel "at home" in his male body, als...

Daniel returns to discuss his life in SoCal, living with two straight men! Like Andrew, he also moved across America for a new start and a new home from the Midwest. He tells us Andrew's teased "pots and pans" story from our last episode, a snapshot of pursuing healthy communication and expectations with straight roommates. Daniel shares some of the joys of living with straight men, including the...

Andrew returns to tell the tale of his cross-country move from Ohio to Southern California! What led him to leave the only home he’d ever known to find a new one? He shares about his upbringing in the Midwest, including many years of homeschooling, and a friend who prompted him to ponder the possibility of a new start. Andrew basks in the literal and existential sunshine of his new life in SoCal,...

Matthew returns to discuss his home life: always living with his family even as he enters his late thirties! He explains the importance of family within his Navajo culture, sharing why he enjoys regularly going home to the reservation after moving away from it. But Matthew also shares why he doesn’t disclose anything about his sexuality with his conservative family. Despite this withholding, Matth...

We spend over half our lives at home; let’s discuss how where we live impacts our faith, sexuality, and masculinity! Join us all summer AT HOME, as we connect with a different YOB community member in a different life stage and living situation. Today we welcome back Marshall to talk more about his unique home life: a 20-acre farm, living alongside 23 people in a central house, cabins, tiny houses,...

We kick off a new summer series, AT HOME: how our current life stages and living situations impact our faith, sexuality, and masculinity. Join us each episode for a new member of our YOB community sharing his story from various life stages and living situations. We start with our “plain old gay” Matt, who has been living with other gay men, both affirming and traditional, after 15 years of living...

Harrison Bly joins the show to discuss masculine friendship! Harrison is a member of our YOBBERS community and the author of Bent on Men, a book recently featured in our monthly YOBBERS Book Club. Both Tom and Harrison reference their books, sharing what happens after some pivotal friendships change, fizzle, or even disintegrate entirely after the final page. They discuss the friendship dynamics o...

Simon joins the show from faraway Britain as our first native UK YOBBER! He tells us about his life in Oxfordshire, including a cat and his very own "flat." Tom bonds with Simon over their shared experiences in Oxford, including the very same bedroom. Simon gives us a lovely list of Britishisms, including the definition of a "yob." He also shares some of his story with faith and sexuality, enlight...

Erin returns to discuss the development of Your Other Sisters, including our recently held coed Zoom call with Your Other Brothers! We recap our YOB and YOS call, including a critical icebreaker of our favorite condiments. We invite all who are interested in these YOB and YOS developments to join us! Man or woman, shoot us an email to learn more: contact[at]yourotherbrothers[dot]com For the rest o...

Our resident Enneagram Seven and unofficial international correspondent, Daniel, returns to pitch this summer's special gathering of YOBBERS -- in Europe! He joins Tom to discuss a smaller-scale retreat or "holiday" somewhere in the Mediterranean, inviting all who are interested to email him ASAP: daniel[at]yourotherbrothers[dot]com Daniel also catches us up on his life in London -- including the...

First-time guest Andrew joins Tom to discuss Netflix’s Heartstopper! It’s a queer coming-of-age show that many in our YOB community have enjoyed, though its depictions of queer romance could also be distracting for some (nothing sexual in the first two seasons, just lots of same-sex kissing). We discuss what we loved from the characters in romantic pairings to the loyal friendships that ultimately...

Tom’s straight younger brother Andy returns for his yearly appearance on the podcast to educate us on this year’s Super Bowl matchup between the Chiefs and 49ers! Beyond merely giving us the players to look out for, Vegas’s odds for the winner of this game, and his own prediction, he also educates us on a truly shocking Taylor Swift lyric. We dive into all the T-Swift and Travis Kelce storylines,...

Alex is announced as our newest regular YOB contributor, and we get right into analyzing his blogs! We start with discussing a reflection of last fall’s YOBBERS retreat written by his mom and how this unique blog even came to be on our site. We also go behind the scenes and into greater depth with his recently posted blog about holding hands with his straight guy friends: one story in which a frie...

Matt returns for a second go on the podcast as we dive into Gen Z fashion trends! Have the '80s and '90s just had a baby and its name is Gen Z? How do we feel about the enlarging of pants, the sprouting of pearl necklaces, and a resurgence in New Balances and Champion sweatshirts? Beyond their fashion choices, how do we feel about this generation's greater openness about sexuality and same-sex fri...

Dawson, formerly Adam in previous podcasts, returns to help Tom celebrate Christmas this year! Dawson shares why he celebrates Christmas in February in addition to December, and Tom tells a Christmas tale of the first man he ever feared. We reference the "Fancy Christmas" recently spent with our YOBBERS community, including someone’s goal to appreciate Jesus’ humanity during what can be a complica...

Aaron returns to the microphone after a nearly yearlong hiatus! Tom catches up with our former YOBcast regular, and "Mr. Finance" gives us his financial forecast for 2024. Aaron also shares about Posture Shift, a nonprofit ministry he's gotten more involved with this year as a member of their advisory council. The guys share some Posture Shift event stories, including the first time Tom publicly i...

It's our post-Thanksgiving episode! Matthew returns to share how he celebrates Thanksgiving with his Navajo family, including which food takes the central place of the traditional American turkey. He also educates us with a Native American fact to help us commemorate Native American Heritage Month. For the rest of our conversation, Matthew and Tom discuss the topic of "Side A" friendship -- that i...

Tom welcomes first-time guest and longtime community member Daniel to discuss journeys with body image and pursuit of the ideal! They share their adolescent vantages from both sides of the scale, Daniel overweight and Tom underweight, and how the gym and general fitness practices have factored into their lives in adulthood. There’s also a good amount of Enneagram talk with Daniel as a Nine and Tom...

Jesse returns to discuss the summer’s biggest, if not most polarizing box office hit, Barbie! Tom reads off some community feedback from our Discord as we dive into hyperfemininity versus hypermasculinity, individuality versus relationships, and all the funny, moving moments from this film as it charts a new path forward for Barbie Land and, indeed, all of humanity. Is Barbie a Side B movie to tho...