Wholehearted Loving

Some things generate energy for us, and some don’t — think people, places, actions and mindsets. Some might raise our energy one day, and feel neutral or tire us out the next. With so much happening in and outside of us all the time, it helps to notice what brings us energy and “raises our vibration” from moment to moment so we can give ourselves more of what we need to make life feel better. In t...

When we experience trauma, and all that follows, our bodies respond in ways that can feel overwhelming and difficult to be with. Tools that comfort and soothe our nervous systems are helpful for these times, and help us grow our capacities and resilience in facing the harder parts of life. Discovering which tools work best with your body and your current thought patterns helps you set yourself up...

It can feel so hard when others have something we want deeply for ourselves, or when we feel like we don’t measure up — to others, or to our own expectations. The ways we compare ourselves have deep roots in our childhoods, and tend to bring out a strong inner critic in us all. Digging into the origins of these feelings, and what they represent for us in our lives, can bring much relief, peace, an...

Every family has ways of connecting (and disconnecting) that are particular to them — and it’s within our family systems that we learned how to relate with the world. Rediscovering family dynamics in the context of compassionate healing work is a powerful tool for deeper connection across all of our relationships, including the relationship with ourselves. In today's episode we talk about what...

The difference between resistance and wholehearted givin’er is stark — where the latter means *nothing will stop you*. Resistance takes many forms — from thoughts and fears to physical symptoms and external blocks — and requires more than just a mindset shift to overcome. In today's episode we bring compassion and nervous system regulation to our resistance, taking baby steps toward what serve...

We're all subject to the expectations of society, our families, and ourselves — as well as to the biological realities of our bodies and the imperatives of procreation. There are so many “shoulds” and hope-to-haves unconsciously built in to how we live and what we strive for...but what happens when these don’t go to plan? In today's episode we talk about finding what’s truest for us from a...

Our relationships with distraction, derailing rumination, and focus are inextricably linked with the states of our nervous system. We all have the power to rewire our systems and our behaviour patterns — and in our view, the best way to do that is in baby steps, with much self-compassion. In today's episode we make space to discover and embrace our relationships with distraction, and share a m...

Inner work and therapies can take us to dark places, processing times of trauma, tragedy, and discomfort in our lives — with much focus on childhood and family dynamics. It can be easy to overlook the good stuff that emerged from family influences. In today's episode we take the time to celebrate how we got to now, and how our families set us on the path to where we find ourselves today. *****...

We all contain aspects that we’ve learned to suppress for fear of losing love, connection or approval. And we all observe aspects in others that we find unpalatable, or irritating, as a result — these are the universe’s highlighter, showing us parts of ourselves we’ve disowned. Discovering and integrating these parts helps us become more whole. In today's episode we talk about our personal exp...

We all have beliefs about reality — and those are what we project onto the world and the people around us. What we see in others is also within us. It can be easy to field someone’s projections when they’re obviously “not ours”, but what about when they reflect a fear we have about ourselves? Or when they’re positive? In today's episode we talk about compassionate self-knowing as the key to in...

There’s a great irony in many societies, where we (sometimes inadvertently) shame others in order to diffuse our own shame. We also employ shame to teach each other lessons, and in the misguided hope of inspiring growth or change. But the truth is, shame makes us feel small, angry, and unloved. Sure, this might cause us to act differently — but an environment of loving support inspires us to grow...

One year into this podcast, and with many years of facilitating transformational groups under our belts, we can tell you that maps and plans can be helpful — but they’ve got nothing on real self-awareness and presence in the moment. With time, trust, and practice, you can find the wisdom within to know what steps you need to take, and when. Start by noticing where you’re at with trusting your proc...

In today’s hustle-forward society, napping can be frowned upon — or reserved only for specific people, places, or times. Maybe a power nap feels acceptable, while a siesta only feels allowable while you’re on vacation. Exploring how we feel about rest for ourselves and others reveals a lot about our beliefs, and our capacity to trust our body’s needs and impulses. In this episode we talk about our...

Our bodies contain so much wisdom, and can connect us with so much information. The natural tendency to identify and fall into patterns is also contained in our bodies...and is totally optional! ⁠ If you have an old pattern or embodied belief that’s no longer serving you, this is your invitation to rewire and refresh — to engage your body in finding newness in the familiar, and connect more deeply...

For better and for worse, our minds get involved with every aspect of our lives, including personal growth work. In today's episode, we talk about discovering ourselves more deeply, connecting with our body’s wisdom, and employing the mind in noticing what comes up for us as we go inward. ************************************************************************ Every episode comes with prompts...

We all cope with fear, confusion and big feelings in a handful of ways that are common to us all. Taking stock of the tools you use — what’s helpful and what isn’t — is an important step in embracing your present reality and growing your capacity for connection in your life and relationships. In today's episode we continue making our way through the list of psychological defenses against emoti...

We protect ourselves from fear, pain and uncertainty using various psychological coping mechanisms like denial — and we manage our emotional turmoil by displacing words and energy, and projecting our feelings or desires onto other people or circumstances. In today's episode we talk about digging into deeper truths by facing the simple reality of what’s working and what isn’t. *****************...

Today's episode is a practice in showing up as you are and comforting yourself through hard times. We use a real life example to talk about the (often unhelpful) meaning we make during conflict, how we make others bad and wrong, and how we can best let go of unhelpful stories to make way for new experiences during changing seasons of life. Mentioned in this episode is coach and mystic Bryce Mu...

In today's episode we talk about part of John Wellwood's book Love and Awakening — where he likens us to castles, with thousands of rooms. The rooms represent our many aspects, many of which we close ourselves off from over the course of our development. In our human need for love and connection, we alter ourselves in ways we deem to be “more acceptable” to the people around us. We cut our...

In today's episode we dig into Dr. Raja Selvam's list of psychological defenses against emotions as presented in his book The Practice of Embodying Emotions — specifically, the first two items: repression and suppression. You also get to meet G's inner child and hear about her sweet, lovable anger, and some of the other bits and pieces we've repressed or suppressed over the years,...

We all have coping strategies to protect our hearts and defend against fear, pain, and uncertainty. Bringing attention to these parts of ourselves and choosing to use these tools consciously is key when it comes to growing self-compassion, and leaning into love and trust in relationships. In today's episode we go through the list of psychological defenses against emotions as presented in Dr. Raja...

We tend to live most of our lives as intellectual endeavors: we know, we see, we might even understand, but we rarely take the time to feel the sensations that go with. Those sensations — good, bad and in-between — are the experiences of LIFE. When we’re accustomed to bypassing those feelings, it requires rewiring our systems in order to really feel alive and present, for ourselves and for each ot...

In this episode we walk you through a tapping and sounding exercise. Nourishing touch is a powerful tool for self-discovery, and self-support — you can use touch and sound to move and generate energy, and to soothe your nervous system in heightened moments, or when remembering challenging events. Touch helps us find the limits of what feels good to our bodies, and what doesn’t. It can also bring p...

It’s standard practice to tamp our feelings down and push past bodily sensations — society teaches us that these get in the way of “doing”. Here, we know the opposite is true, and that the data our bodies give us are vital and informative. Learning your body’s language — and how to respond — is integral to happy, fulfilling, drama-free living. In today's episode we walk you through a body-base...

Today's episode is built around this meme: "If you want rest you have to take it. You have to resist the lure of busyness. Make time to rest, take it seriously, and protect it from a world that's intent on stealing it." — Alex Pang We talk about building rest, self-connection, and moments of peace into your busy day, and take a serious look at where we insert optional pressures a...