Wholehearted Loving

Most of us tend to feel a charge when someone tells us “we need to talk”, and we tend to bring that charge — along with all the assumptions, emotions, and defenses that ensue — into the conversation with us. Getting curious (and compassionate) about our patterns here is a great way to start clearing the space between us, for deeper, more honest connection and mutual understanding. In today's e...

We all have different experiences being present in our bodies, and varying degrees to which being in the body is comfortable or even possible, depending on the circumstances. Learning to shift and balance focus between noticing external sensations and noticing internal ones is helpful in growing your capacity to be with a range of feelings and experiences. In today's episode we talk about what...

When we’re not feeling well, physically, mentally, or emotionally, knowing what to do and taking any steps can feel challenging. In today's episode, we give you simple questions you can ask yourself in those moments, to bring yourself where you want to be in baby steps, with self-compassion. ************************************************************************ Every episode comes with promp...

Celebrating small things (wins or otherwise) has a cumulative effect that helps us see the world in a positive light, and gives us perspective that helps when life gets rough. Being able to identify — and share! — your wins, or things you find delightful, or moments you want to celebrate, is a great way to feel better in life and relationships. In today's episode, we talk about how to celebrate, c...

We all have so much conditioning around attraction — to who and what attracts (and is attracted to) us; to who and what we think we should be attracted to. This manifests in so many ways! Bringing conscious attention and compassion here is a necessary step for building lives and relationships that light us up. In today's episode we talk about some of what's attracted us in the past, and ho...

We all have learned responses to anger — our own anger, and other people’s. We also have patterns for how we manage anger when we’re regulated, and when we’re not. Growing our capacities to be with feelings of anger (and what’s underneath them) is a key for compassionate parenting and conscious relationships. In today's episode we talk about the differences between being with anger, and wantin...

Worry is natural — and we’re not here to stop you from worrying, or thinking, or hoping for the future. We would love to show you how you can hold your own hand through the journey, though — how you can be along with yourself for the ride. Adding small instances of body awareness to your current patterns of worry and stress is an entry point for bringing more presence to your life and relationship...

It’s easy to get overly rigid when we set ourselves a personal goal. Gym, journaling, meditation, healthy eating — whatever it is, we tend to make such extensive and far-reaching demands of ourselves that we’re sure to fall short of our own expectations. This is your invitation to be flexible on your path, moving toward what supports you with trust for the process and compassion for where you are...

Our minds are designed to make meaning out of everything we experience. That's helpful for practical matters, but when it comes to beliefs about ourselves and the world, old conditioning and past experiences can bog us down in shame, shoulds and not-enoughness. Practicing noticing your thoughts and discovering the beliefs underneath them is a great way to cultivate more self-compassion. In today's...

Because others see us through the lens of their own experiences, they won’t always see all of our aspects, especially the ones we’ve learned to hide — but it’s only by being ourselves, expressing ourselves, and sharing of ourselves that we can be known for who we really are. Tell someone — or ask someone — about the hidden, misunderstood parts, and enjoy the deeper connection this creates. In this...

When it comes to creating your reality, your power lies in the choices you make each moment — what you hear, see, and think about becomes your sphere of experience, and what you experience is your reality. Taking stock of what you’ve been consuming with your eyes, ears, heart and mind is a great way to notice what feels good and what could inspire even more good feelings in your everyday. In today...

Those of us who are interested in personal growth and relationship development all face a similar challenge: it’s too easy to get swept away with insights, and bogged down in self-awareness. Integration and healing happen when we bring our discoveries down into our bodies, and out into our lives. The path there is a practical one, to be taken with baby steps and compassion. In today's episode...

Noticing how far you’ve come and what unhelpful patterns you’re learning to shift is so important for feeling more connected in your life and relationships. Growing your skills to bring compassion to what you notice, and to celebrate where you’re at today, is a beautiful practice to bring in at the end of your day, or to close self-care or self-discovery sessions. In today's episode we walk th...

It’s easy to overwhelm ourselves with shoulds and grand plans — which tends to lead us into shut down and not knowing what to do next. We like to provide a simple prescription of baby steps, letting our bodies lead us to the next simple, helpful, decent, soothing, or constructive (non-destructive) step...and trusting the path to unfold with compassion. In today's episode we talk about simple p...

We all have different responses when we make mistakes, which depend on the “quality” of mistake, our experiences being “wrong” or inconveniencing others, and the state of our nervous systems. Taking stock of your current go-to thoughts and actions when a mistake is made is a great start for moving toward healthy, helpful responses — so you can more peacefully get on with your life when a mistake i...

Asking for help when we’re at our absolute limit is commonplace — so is only expressing ourselves when we have something to celebrate or complain about. What if we could share of ourselves, and ask for support and comfort, before we’re at the edge? When we don’t have any immediate “value” to add? Mapping your current relationship with asking and sharing is a good place to start. In today's epi...

Rewiring your nervous system and learning to bring presence to the moment doesn’t happen while you’re in crisis — it’s something you practice before the big game, so your body can begin to learn new ways to respond to triggers. Practicing while you’re feeling steady grows your capacity to bring these tools to life when you’re not. In today's episode we talk about simple practices we used to gr...

We often try to ease fear, anger and anxiety by unloading our feelings and seeking resolution with others. Sometimes this is helpful, but sometimes it isn’t. When we’re feeling big feelings, it’s important to map our current patterns and conditioned responses, to regulate our nervous systems, and to seek reality checks from loved ones who have the time and energy — leaning in to love, trust, and c...

There are so many clues our bodies give us when things are off, and when they’re just right. Learning to tap into this wisdom helps you design a life that feels better, and relationships that serve your highest good. Like Goldilocks, you know when porridge is too hot, too cold, or just right — and you can train your system to orient you toward that same easeful clarity in life and love. In today's...

If you’ve been conditioned to lean into stress, drama, and unhelpful emotional acceleration...you’re in good company! And you might find yourself desiring more feelings of peace and stability. Embracing where you’re at today is key when it comes to compassionately rewiring your system for a healthier life and happier relationships. In today's episode we talk about our experiences reprogramming...

When icky or anxious circumstances arise and you’re powerless to do anything to change them — what’s your pattern? What’s your go-to method for management and relief through the feelings that come up? There is much healing to be found in these patterns, and body-based tools you can practice to learn to be with any circumstances. In today's episode we talk about some of the things we can't...

When we’re in pain or experiencing emotional turmoil, it’s pretty standard practice for humans to cast around for yet more pain to fuel the fire — we keep adding logs until we have a raging bonfire that shows no signs of burning out. What if we were to burn through one log at a time instead? What if we felt all those feelings fully, without piling more on top? In today's episode we talk about...

Many of us have only experienced boundaries drawn in mean and aggressive ways; many of us have experienced boundaries not being drawn at all, and; many, many of us have trouble expressing our own boundaries in helpful, loving ways. “Boundary-muscles” need to be grown like any other, and taking stock of your own experiences with boundaries supports the process. In today's episode we talk about...

When you’re feeling low, heavy, unhealthy or uninspired — you have patterns for that. You have patterns for joy, expansiveness, feeling abundant, and healthy connection too. Learning what you’ve grown acclimatized to — and what would feel better than that — is key in moving beyond patterns that are no longer helpful, so you can grow into a more fulfilling life & relationships. In today's e...

In 2024, feeling “personally attacked” can mean being seen in a good way, or being exposed in a way that gets our backs up. In either case, there’s so much gold for us here if we’re willing to look for it. Discovering what we protect and defend is a call to go deeper in relationship with these aspects of ourselves and our communities. “Personal attacks” can be key opportunities for integration, po...