We Need To Talk with Dr. Darcy Sterling

Everyone fights. We all disagree — at least in our most secure relationships.  Making up after a fight is one of the most important relationship skills I teach - and it’s a topic that’s rarely discussed. I get it.  It’s not sexy.  In this episode, you’ll learn: The difference between an apology and a repair.  My 4-step process to repair like a pro. Biggest rookie mistakes to av...

You’ve probably heard people throw around the phrase, “ Love Languages.”   The 5 Love Languages is a book written by Gary Chapman, a pastor from North Carolina, in which he posits that humans have 5 different ways we express our love for each other: Acts of Service Gifts Quality Time Touch Words of Affirmation  The term itself makes innate sense because most of us have had relationships...

As we wrap up another year, many of us look to January as a fresh start. It’s a new year — it feels like a blank slate — and it’s a time when we’re encouraged, at least in the western world and particularly in America, to reflect on our life and to pick a goal to strive for in the coming year — to try to improve something, or maybe kick a negative habit or trait. I have complicated feelings about...

Exes…  We all have them. Even if they’re ex friends or family members.  Exes are people from our past who historically occupied a critical place in our tribe and for whatever reason, no longer do.  Knowing what to do with an ex can be tricky. Because we miss them.  Sometimes we still love them. But does that mean they should be welcomed back into our life? In this episode, you’...

We go to great lengths to avoid having fights — especially with our partners. But is that sustainable? Or even achievable?  What does it say about your relationship if you’ve never had a fight?  And is it always a red flag when you start fighting?  We need to know how to navigate difficult conversations in all our relationships, and occasionally that means having the skills to manag...

Holidays are complicated. They’re pitched as a season of joy but we all know they come with added pressures, more responsibilities, and close proximity to our history, which isn’t always positive. Everyone has their unique associations with what the season means, what’s expected of them, and what they expect from others. But the common denominator — other than joy — is stress. We all feel it, even...

Therapy…  Everyone knows you should do it at some point in your life, but how do you know if you’ve got the right therapist, or if you’re in the right kind of therapy?  In this very candid conversation, I give you answers to all your questions, like:  How many sessions will it take to know if it’s working? What the hell are you supposed to talk about in therapy, anyway? How much sho...

Dating, in general, has always induced equal amounts of excitement and dread in my clients and students. But in today’s world of digital dating, the overwhelm is at an all time high, as is dating burnout.  In this episode, I give you the tips you need to date smarter — not harder.  You’ll learn how to optimize your online profile, which I learned when I was the Global Ambassador to Tinde...

Breakups are a part of life.  Even if it’s not a romantic breakup, friendships end, family connections change over time.  There’s simply no escaping the grief that comes from the loss of a relationship. But why does that loss devastate some people more than others?  Why are some of us gutted and barely able to function while others seem hardly impacted?  In my first episode of...