Warped

This week the gang has mixed emotions as we say goodbye to Dr. Pulaski and welcome back our dear Dr. Crusher. Beverly's concerned because Wes doesn't seem to know any kids his own age, and all his acquaintances are either middle-aged men or robots. But Wesley doesn't care! Like most teenage boys he can make his own friends, if by friends you mean sentient nanobots who threaten the lives of everyon...

"I'm having a hard time in my head picturing what these episodes are going to sound like." - Matt, 1/24/21 Prophetic words, my friends! Words of DUNE! Has Matt drunk from the Water of Life, or is he just drunk? The menagerie has taken over the zoo this week as we wrap up our watchthrough of DUNE. Shawn knows what the fox says, Minh admits he cannot conquer the worm, Erin loves even the most hairle...

This week we abandon our beloved utopian Starfleet for the wild, weird world of Arrakis! That's right, we're watching David Lynch's least favorite movie of all time, DUNE! And I'm not gonna lie, we're all over the place this week. Minh asks the eternal question: did Michael Jackson SING about the Elephant Man, or BUY HIM? May compares Duke Leto to the Duke from Bridgerton, Shawn wonders if Dune in...

Come with us as Warped delves into the season 2 finale of Star Trek: The Next Generation, and finds a relic of TV's past... The Clip Show!!!! While enjoying the clips for reference Erin also marvels at the wonder that is bearded Jonathan Frakes. We decide that more fun than a Jack Ryan prequel would be a Jake Ryan prequel. Speaking of guys who could get it, Commander Riker goes through ghosts of b...

On this week's Warped we get into Riker Swagger and why does Star Trek keep proving to us it's in the future. Matt tries to gaslight Shawn about the Golden Girls spin-off with Cheech and we all wonder at the beauty that is Bea Arthur in the Star Wars Holiday Special. Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the podcast all of Picard's fish are gone and Jake thinks they may have been Mulda...

Welcome to our "Vavavavooom!" episode. "This one's got steam heat coming off it." In a future Star Trek post-scarcity future, what exactly are the stakes in a poker game? Friendship.. cigarettes... bragging rights? Our dear captain-leader Matt settles on the most plausible answer.. they're playing for holodeck hours. Of course. Minh has immigration stories. We take a huge tour through Recommendati...

Betazoid pon farr, fish people, voyeuristic pets, a bad MLK analogy, self-loathing, "Now my finger smells like Tiberius". This episode's got some takes, and only half of them come from Warped crew member Minh. He regrets so much! But Erin comes in like White Gandalf on Shadowfax to restore some semblance of right to the world. Meanwhile, look forward to Warped's new line of signature fragrances an...

In this weeks episode we go old school. Star Trek gets back to its Irish hating roots and all feels right with the world. Unfortunately they didn't remember to also bring with them the most important character from the original show...SCREENIE!!!!!!!! Oh well we should all have a drink but oh right no bars, remember bars guys. Matt and Jake both introduce their newest character impressions and we...

For the first time in forever Minh introduces a new character to Warped.  We discuss the ease of flying in space and the etiquette regarding food replicators vis-a-vis sandwiches.  Matt is made furious by some disturbing Jeopardy news (no its not that news).  Finally is Minh the true life story behind the movie Big.  Find out on this weeks episode of Warped. Hosted on Acast. Se...

We're flipping the script again, as Erin kicks off a very special episode of Warped. It's our first encounter with the Borg, and May's first encounter with the Q Continuum. A special guest star gives us the opportunity to lightly graze a three-breasted treasure of science fiction cinema. It should be no surprise by now that Guinan steals the show for us whenever she gets involved. Despite the form...

We're all over the place on this one, you guys. Erin comes in hard with the scorching hot takes like: Does Picard love horses TOO much? And do ugly little girls even DESERVE saving? Meanwhile, Matt explains the prime directive, May orders chili-cheese fries, and we all talk about what's on our Christmas trees. (We recorded this a while ago.) We may admire Picard's management style, but let's face...

New York's hottest club is The Icarus Factor! It has everything: Slap fights, sperm speed, daddy issues, and Gremlins! Happy New Year, everyone! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Merry Christmas dear listeners! This holiday season, cozy up with Warped Host Matt's revolutionary cooking technique for eggs. It will change your life and give you a new appreciation for eggs. Minh swears by it! At some point we realize that the tides are turning when more of the cast have watched the episodes than not. What has the world come to? Shawn then helps us pour a dozen out for the many...

Once again the Warped crew asks the tough questions. Do you own a bolo tie? What defines cheating? What book would you like to be stuck in for decades? ( if you would like to answer this question yourself please email us at warpedthepodcast@gmail.com and maybe we will read it on air!!!!!) and most importantly, who's eating on mic? ( turns out everyone) We learn there is a level of nerd that even M...

Before answering the great questions of the day like: "Do you remember mousse?", "What's the most 90's movie?" and "Where is the pee hole?", the Warped crew discusses Romulan fashion. Erin gets stumped by the strangest FMK to date ( and that's saying something) and we discuss Jean Luc's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. in the end we all take solace that we live in a world with Dolly Part...

"It's a Wesley episode, so buckle in." We certainly get this episode started hot and heavy. It must be the dolphins. Aside from briefly traipsing through French royal history, we also chat about which of the Star Trek crew we'd want to give our kids "the talk".. you know, with the space birds and the green-skinned alien bees. Interestingly enough, no one said Picard. May marvels at the broad reach...

It's "The Measure of a Man.. Yea baby!" Is it the *greatest* episode of ST:TNG or the *first* great episode? Who knows, who cares? Because we fall in love all over again (this episode really cops the feely-feels on the Warped crew). So come snuggle with us this frigid holiday eve. Emotions run strong, love is in the air, America made its vote heard. What's not to love? Happy holidays, everyone! We...

Cultural misunderstandings abound on this week's Warped! Minh confuses Ben Vereen for our favorite Star Trek aliens, Erin tells us how an octopus can teach a man, Jake forgets what jingle he's singing, and we all ponder Will "The Tromboner" Riker's effect on Klingon women! We also dig deep into nudity in 80s movies, and come down firmly pro-dong! All this, plus a Wrath of Khan Corrections Corner,...

We're feeling our age on this week's Warped! Minh defends the elderly while the rest of us mock. We ponder whether our parents were hot when they were young, and were we? And how much older can Dr. Pulaski get anyway? Meanwhile Minh worries about getting his groove on, Shawn remembers the Star Trek Las Vegas ride, and we speculate on who among us is the Jerry of the Warped crew. (Parks and Rec fan...

On this week's Warped we get down and dirty with a meteorological FMK, while the Earth lets humans know what it thinks about RBG's death.  Erin gets excited about the notion of Chris Evans' peen being on the internet and a discussion pops up about how we, the Warped crew, would handle our dick pics. Meanwhile May introduces a new segment where she goes down a hole of some kind.  And in S...

Shawn has harsh words at the top of the hour for long missing cast member, Philippe. We miss you dearly, brother! Minh proves yet again that you should *never* invite him onto your bar trivia team. At least he's light. We continue to worry about whether we're offending our single listener. Please, if you're reading this... we're sorry. For everything. Quotable quotes from this episode: "I should l...

"Welcome in everyone, to Erin's intro." gg, girl! Before trading trivia about the Big Whoops, Erin remodels our Corrections Corner into a more comfortable Corrections Nook. Sippin' on gin 'n juice in our new nook, we find out sex(uality) is on our minds as we contemplate the smoldering looks and rakish vest of our hero. Shawn and Matt enjoy rolling tits in their mouths, while our usual game of FMK...

It's that time on Warped where we celebrate law enforcement figures who appear in books and film, and nowhere else. May has read an article, so expect Lower Decks tidbits. Minh and Matt wander onto the holodeck. A V. C. Andrews marathon reels in Erin. There is an attempt to defend the actions of one Dr. Pulaski, but the truth is that some of the crew have yet to cultivate a proper love for Data, w...

Listeners are invited to email the show to name Minh's hypothetical child. Erin is weirded out by some bad looks. Riker gives Data a good look at his business affairs, and Data takes notes in an effort to be more human. Our favorite Star Trek trope returns for season 2: the Energized Cloud! Minh introduces a brand new captain into Trek canon. We give Erin lease to conduct us on the Corky Romano tr...

In a show of many firsts, Erin kicks off the new season with a single question repeated: where's Whoopi? Where's Whoopi?! Seymour Cassel gives Minh some serious Rip Taylor vibes. The alien baby from this episode is giving us reverse elephant vibes. Data is giving us Tin Man mashed with Scarecrow vibes. Riker is giving off "I'm not buying that kid shoes" vibes. We learn a deeply sad truth about Pic...