Warped

Episode 189 - Zardoz (Part 2) Flush with excitement after being exposed to the first half of John Boorman's almost too bonkers to believe it existed sci-fi extravaganza, Zardoz, the Warped crew is primed and pumped for Part 2! We were so primed. So pumped! I mean, in the second half we learn that Sean Connery's sweat has magic fuck powers. Cool! There are more tenacious tatas to be titillated by....

Episode 188 - Zardoz (Part 1) It's our season break movie watch and, because Erin insisted on it and we always do what she says, we're watching Zardoz! Marvel at Sean Connery being styled to look like Burt Reynolds! Delight in 70s boobs and animated erections! Gasp in astonishment as Shawn guesses the secret of Zardoz 10 minutes into the movie! Tremble in fear as Matt repeatedly says bandolero whe...

Episode 187 - The Best of Both Worlds Sooooo, great episode? Or GREATEST EPISODE EVER? It's hard to decide, because this one has it all! Riker's Career Conflicts! The Guy Who Played God Or Whatever In Star Trek V! The Chin Of Dennehy! Erin and Phillipe are full of opinions this week, which is what happens when they watch the episode before we record. For example, is the Borg ship a bad design? And...

Episode 186 - Transfigurations Shawn isn't quite able to nail our intro, but we've been summer vacationing for the last few weeks. So whaddya-gunna-do? Even Captain Picard got his time off on Risa! Happily this week, Geordi *is* able to nail it! After being touched by the healing spirit of Dr. Crusher's newfound (and very short-lived) love interest, Geordi discovers a confidence and swagger that w...

Episode 185 - Ménage à Troi "Sexy fun times ahead.. with a title like that, it's gotta be good!" It's a hot, horny, and hilarious episode this week as we gawp at the problematic Star Trek Season 3 episode known as "Ménage à Troi". The themes certainly fuel conversation, from Ferengi sexual proclivities (that'll be a no on oral), to Riker and Troi's open relationship (friends can kiss each other fu...

Episode 184 - Sarek Spock's well-sculptured father, Sarek, visits the starship Enterprise to broker a peace treaty with the disco slime Legarans in what may be his very last diplomatic mission. But what the crew of the Enterprise don't realise is that Sarek has come down with a wicked case of the Bendii's (crickey!) and all hell is about to break loose. Thankfully the Warped crew is well-versed in...

Episode 183 - The Most Toys What's the difference between a hoarder and a collector? Is it just taste? And did Data shoot that guy or what? Opinions differ on this week's episode, but we all agree that Data looks great in lavender. Alien makeup preferences are explored, and Minh takes a bold stance. We question the comfort of beds in the future (square pillows?) but the couches are definitely down...

Episode 182 - Hollow Pursuits It's New Faces Week on Warped as the Enterprise welcomes a new crew member and the podcast welcomes a new guest! Kate joins the gang in-studio to discuss the debut of Lieutenant Barclay and the ethics of Holodeck sexy fun times, in an episode that raises all kinds of interesting questions. For example, is anyone in Starfleet a good manager? And has Troi ever even met...

Things get therapeutic this week, as Phillipe reveals why this was his favorite episode of TNG as a lonely kid dreaming of being part of something bigger. Thinking about being part of something bigger naturally leads to an extended digression about Voltron, Jetfire, and the fictional vehicles of our youth. The nostalgia vibes are strong as we remember Knight Rider, Airwolf, The A-Team (apologies i...

Maybe it's because this is our first episode recorded in person back in the studio together, fully vaxed and fully waxed! Maybe it's because Jean-Luc gets to visit Risa! Maybe it's the White Russians and the Margaritas! Whatever the reason, this is a very energetic, and very HORNY conversation! I mean, we all know what happens on Risa stays on Risa, but what happens back on the Enterprise? When Je...

Trust. Who has it? Who wants it? And what's it worth to you anyway? These are the tough questions Star Trek tackles this week, while we goof off instead of paying attention! * Minh stumps Shawn in a round of "What Show Is Minh Talking About?" (See if you can guess! I put the answer at the end of the show notes.) * A Bolian, a Fangtooth, and the Sydney Opera House walk into a bar, and we FMK them,...

It's a matter of honor (but not "A Matter of Honor" that's episode 143) this week as we begin our deep dive into the murky waters of Klingon politics. Minh kicks things off with a Klingons/Cling-Wrap joke and frankly things don't get any better from there. Worf and Kurn inspire the gang to share their stories of brothers fighting, except for lonely child Matt, who can't relate. Erin has to choose...

We're keepin' em separated (90s kids will get this reference), as Erin does a new version of the show intro, throwing the rest of the Gang into disarray. Data gets a daughter this week, but in classic TNG fashion, she doesn't stick around. (Remember Deanna's space baby? Deanna doesn't.) We take a peek behind the curtain into the Warped editing process, which frankly probably should have been cut....

Great episode, or THE GREATEST EPISODE?!?! We're getting high on our own supply and remembering how much we love Star Trek on this week's episode. Erin gives us a new catchphrase - "Let's get Warped!" - and another variation on the show intro. Shawn and Matt geek out over the changes to the ship and crew in the alternate timeline (I love typing the words "alternate timeline"). For some reason an i...

Is Riker a Sex Creep? Or does every woman in the world want him? It's all just a matter of perspective on this week's episode! (See what I did there?) It's Space Rashomon as the gang tries to figure out who killed Hector Salamanca, and all they know is it wasn't Gus Fring. That was for all the Breaking Bad fans out there. Meanwhile, Matt praises Ghost of Tsushima! Shawn stands up for Ace Ventura!...

Tensions are running high among the Warped crew, and Erin's mind is blown when all her illusions regarding sour cream distribution methods at fast food Mexican restaurants are exposed. We get some Q side-butt in this episode (Happy Pride, everyone!) but a debate about whether Q or Guinan would be more fun to hang out with turns ugly. Minh and Erin have some problems with butt-faced aliens, forcing...

Star Trek gets political and gives us a SPACE version of The Troubles on this week's episode. Everyone's happy that Beverly gets a lot to do this time, but that's not enough to keep us from going off on some tangents. (Nothing is able to keep us from going off on tangents!) We reminisce about that weird phase in the 90s when we all listened to swing music and dressed like hepcats, the Real Housewi...

I don't like to name names, but someone on the Warped crew is having some serious pon farr this week, resulting in one of our horniest episodes ever. Topics include: * Is Riker a responsible lover? * We know Data is fully functional, but what does that MEAN, exactly? * What's the deal with birth control in the future? * How raunchy can we make the words "Jeffries Tube" sound? * And what happens wh...

Phillipe makes a triumphant return to the pod, resulting in an extra-full, bordering on overstuffed, episode. We've got Shakespeare! We've got Klingon Opera! We've got rats AND canaries! Erin's on fire this week, tricking us into mansplaining what a nacelle is (Secret Romulan!) and extolling the virtues of Brewer's Yeast. Matt reveals yet another sex dream about someone on the Warped crew, then wo...

(NOTE FROM THE FUTURE: Hey, shouldn't this be episode 168??? Yes. Yes it should. But, as it must with all things, death has come to episodes 168 and 169. (Translation: we screwed up and the recordings were lost.) Will we go back and someday rerecord 168 and 169? Maybe. Maybe we will. And now back to your regularly scheduled show notes.) Not everyone is doing their best on this week's episode. Minh...

Nothing creepy about this one, no sir! Nothing at all! Geordi acts like a perfectly normal non-creeper in this one we swear! Okay, so MAYBE Geordi creates a sex hologram who tells him that every time he touches the ship he's touching her. Maybe that happens. But it's FINE you guys. Dragons gonna Drag, you know? Meanwhile, Erin wants to visit the Senor Frog's on Aurelius Icks, Matt admires the many...

Star Trek explores some alternative takes on parenting this week. Can an energized cloud raise a 10-year-old boy? Picard doesn't seem to care, but luckily Troi is there to talk some sense. Meanwhile, Minh makes his triumphant return to the podcast and can't get over how good the show looks these days, Matt is bored, Patches the cat livens things up, and we explore whether space is filled with gian...

It's weird watching Ray Wise play a benign alien rather than a possessed serial killer, but we're trying to make the best of it on this week's episode! Erin wonders if David Lynch confused Ray Wise for Harry Hamlin, while Matt and Shawn award retroactive Oscars to Twin Peaks and Gremlins 2. (Can 30 year old TV shows win Oscars? They can in our world!) Shawn fondly remembers the old Universal Studi...

You know things are bad when Worf drinking tea with his pinky out and saying "Good tea, nice house" is the most famous thing to happen in this episode. But we make our own fun around here! Matt introduces a new segment called What's Marina Tweeting?, Erin wonders about the worst song to get stuck in your head, and we all decide we're pro-aquarium, even if it means dentists charge too much. Plus: I...

It's a real iconoBLAST on this week's episode as we dig deep into the... let's say complicated love life of everyone's favorite android! Minh wonders if Data's got groove, Jake can't figure out how he gets more action than Geordi, and we all speculate on what he tastes like. (Plastic? Metal? A warm summer day?) Meanwhile in Correction Corner, we dig deep into the troubled family life of Bing Crosb...