Unf*ck Your Relationships

What gives? Things were going so well, you felt like you really liked this guy. Why then, seemingly out of nowhere do you now loathe the very way he breathes? This, friends is the dreaded ick; the sudden irritating or off-putting thing you randomly notice after things were going so well. I got more information about it, but you're not gonna like it. Because it's actually not about him or his teeth...

What's your game plan with your emotions? Do you even have one? Do you go radio silent and withdraw, as you clutch tea and stare out the window, preferably at the rain? OR do you enjoy leaning into intense feelings, embracing them as you throw epic tantrums and verbal barbs? Is there a balance between the two? There is! Especially when we first go from suppressing to expressing, it can be hard to...

Sure, sometimes circumstances in life can get hard, but for the most part, you set the tone for your own life. Are you living in the land of the desperate, constantly in a panic about the world running out of men and yourself running out of time and fun and youth and money? If that's all you fixate on, and all you look for it literally wires your brain to look for every bad thing out there; it'll...

Nothing can take a date from great to…not great quite like unrealistic expectations. Maybe he is just as charming as your text banter. Maybe you both really do have the same chemistry in person as you do over the phone. There is a chance that he is the one. But for the love of god, please just let things unfold naturally. Not sure how to do this? Well lucky for you, on the latest episode of The Un...

Is there anything more exciting or terrifying than a first date? No other event is so full of hopeful potential as well as awkward dread; It's a weird thing for sure. And then there are the "first date tips" that usually revolve around what to wear and what to eat (or not eat because - patriarchy) and a whole host of other superficial bullshit that doesn't actually help you establish a connection...

I've been thinking a lot about thoughts. Specifically the power we give them over us and over situations in our lives. Don't get me wrong, honoring your feelings is important, but when they demand you spiral out and assign meaning to things that aren't true, it's easy to get bowled over by them- and half the time they aren't even true. In this episode I talk more about: How situations we panic abo...

Intention is everything, babes, so you have to figure out yours. WHY do you want to date? I am telling you right now, if you haven't done *the* work, you shouldn't get back out there. It's easy to know when you shouldn't date, but it's harder to know if you're finally ready. We all know that we need to feel complete and in love with ourselves before we can ever expect to enter into a healthy partn...

There are so many rules for women and girls in society; cultural expectations about what a woman is and what a woman should be, and it's all bullshit. We're taught to shrink ourselves, physically and mentally, to never be too much, or take up space. To sacrifice bits of who we are to appease others. Don't make waves or make anyone uncomfortable, even if your own skin is crawling. Appease appease a...

Maybe you have a dude in your life, and he's great. He's cute and sweet and funny, and the sex is good. But GOD sometimes you just want him to be the man so you can be the woman. But, what if I told you that you might actually be the problem here. It's not that he isn't masculine, it's that you BOTH are, and much like your fav pair of underwear, there can only be one. In this episode I break down...

This one's for all my ladies who feel like all they attract is men of the emotionally unavailable kind…girl I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you're the problem. No, keep reading, just hear me out; like peanut butter cups and bad romance novels, bad boys are kind of addictive. It's why the second he starts to show interest you feel smothered and sprint your cute butt right outta there to...

We spend so much time identifying and dissecting warning signs in dating, it can feel hopeless. How would we even know if a guy is decent and datable? Would we recognize the signs? Well, lucky for you dear listener, I present the 12 green flags that will help you along your quest of finding out if he's worth your time. In this episode, we'll go more into: Learning how to spot a good potential part...

It may seem like a hard answer to find, but friend, if you're debating whether or not to put that foot out the door…that's not a good sign. You gotta learn to trust yourself, and what your emotions are trying to tell you. Why would you want to stay in a relationship where you're the one who is making all the effort? You can't want it for both of you, or you can't want it for the both of you and ex...

You can't wait to meet HIM. The ONE. He'll be attractive and put together and communicative, self-assured but also safe. But here's the thing; if you're holding him to high standards, chances are he's holding you to the same. So are you in a place to accept his healthy affection? Are you in a place where you can meet the same standards you have set for him? Are you prepared to enter into a relatio...

Well, well, well. If it isn't the blessed 50% of the population. You lucky, securely attached bastards. You think you're cooler than the rest of us? I mean, you're not wrong. But, the truth is, you're the goal. And we can allll reach that goal. It's just gonna take a little work. In this episode I go more into: What being securely attached actually means How securely attached people show up in rel...

Oh, you fearful-avoidant unicorns. You are a small percentage of the population. So small, but mightily terrible. I'm so sorry. Let's break down your particular cross to bear. Yet again, we're going up against a traumatic childhood, however, this one is mainly fear-based trauma. You likely had parents who loved to overshare (resulting in parentification of you, the child), when they felt like it....

And we're back, analyzing new ways our parents meant well but ultimately set us up for failure… Did you have parents who made sure you were physically fine, and then blatantly neglected you for the other stuff? Maybe they thought they were making you independent, maybe they were relating to you the only way they knew how, but now here you are, stuffing down all your feelings and straight-up avoidi...

Oh, mommy (and daddy) issues. They did their best, they really did, but the cold hard fact is that if you were raised with parents who gave you inconsistent support, you probably have anxious attachment issues now. When you're taught that your own thoughts and feelings are "too much" you begin to censor yourself; you try and make yourself palatable to the world around you. And you also begin to di...

Online dating. So much potential. So much danger. In order to make sure you're not matching with people who are wildly inappropriate for you (hold onto your butts here, I'm about to blow your mind) you have to actually be honest about what you want and who you are. Ugh, vulnerability. Why is vulnerability always the answer? Sorry kid, but in order to find "the one" you're going to have to try and...

Stop. Putting. Him. Up. There. On today's episode of the Unf*ck Your Relationships podcast, we're talking about pedestals and why you shouldn't put men up there (but girl, we can understand the urge to do so). No one is perfect, and if all you focus on is the good and build it up to mean more than it does, you'll never make a genuine connection. On this episode, I'll explain in detail: Why we pede...

On today's episode of the Unf*ck Your Relationships podcast, we're talking about how to give up the ghost — of a relationship, that is. While it's probably gone on forever, these days the term for disappearing when dating is termed ghosting, and it can really throw you for a loop. Dating is hard enough without wondering why you and a dude couldn't stop texting one minute and the next he's nowhere...

On today's episode of the Unf*ck Your Relationships podcast, we're talking about how to deal when you get your heart broken. Whether you were the initiator, on the receiving end, or the series finale was a mutual decision; breakups are tough to handle. All the questions, self-doubt, and paranoia invade your brain, in between pints of cookie dough ice cream and "Legally Blonde" viewings... tears in...

In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships Podcast, I'm getting vulnerable. Like, really vulnerable. Here's the deal; I have herpes. And you know what? It's actually not the clusterfuck your high school health teacher warned you about. I still have fulfilling intimate relationships, and it's even taught me to be in tune with my body's needs in a new way. Am I endorsing you going out and intentio...

In this episode of The Unf*ck Your Relationships Podcast, I'm getting into how you can strive to stop being so hard on yourself and focus on accepting all of you! Life will never be "perfect," and that's ok. You can be doing the work and still make mistakes. We're going to talk about: Focusing on yourself and not comparing yourself to others Accepting all parts of yourself, even the ones you're no...

In this episode of The Unf*ck Your Relationships Podcast, I'm sharing the moment when I felt like everything shifted for me – and how the lessons I learned can help you become the next-level version of yourself! Here's what I'll cover: My BIG life-changing shift that helped shape the rest of my career & life. Key questions to ask yourself in order to receive everything you deserve. I hope this epi...

In this episode of The Unf*ck Your Relationships Podcast, I'm excited to talk about how to shift when you're not getting what you want. I've spoken about letting go of timelines before, but today, we're talking about THE number one thing that helps me shift, and I repeat this to my clients all the time: Nothing means anything. Here's what I'll cover: How the stories you tell yourself about your lo...