Things You Learn in Therapy

Send us Fan Mail The fastest way to turn pickup time into a power struggle is to start with a checklist: seatbelt, behavior report, homework, chores, questions, questions, questions. If you’ve ever watched your kid shut down the second they get in the car, we get it and there’s a better first move. I’m Dr. Beth Trammell, a licensed psychologist, and I’m sharing one of my favorite tools for improvi...

Send us Fan Mail Your feed can make you feel like everyone else has parenting figured out and your brain treats those images like facts. That is where the spiral starts: comparison, pressure, overstimulation, and the quiet sense that you are failing at something that is already hard. We sit down with licensed professional counselor Nicole McNelis, a perinatal mental health clinician and leading vo...

Send us Fan Mail The moment you ask for something small a knock before entering, a little privacy, a basic respect and the conversation somehow ends with you apologizing, you are not “too sensitive.” We dig into why interactions with emotionally immature parents and other emotionally immature people can feel so disorienting, especially for adult children of dysfunctional families carrying complex...

Send us Fan Mail Therapy is “just listening” the way surgery is “just holding a scalpel.” Barbara Sheehan Zeidler joins me to name the thing many clinicians feel but rarely say out loud: our presence is the intervention. Barbara is a licensed professional counselor, an EMDR approved trainer and consultant, IFS Level 3 certified, and a proud polyvagal nerd, and she breaks down why grounded attuneme...

Send us Fan Mail Trauma doesn’t have to be catastrophic to be real and “it wasn’t bad enough” might be the most common thought that keeps people from getting help. We sit down with Scott E. Stolarick, LCPC, CCTP, a trauma-informed therapist and the owner of Mosaic Pathway Counseling, to unpack why trauma isn’t a competition and why two people can live through the same moment and walk away with com...

Send us Fan Mail Summer doesn’t need to be a “go with the flow” free-for-all to be fun. I’m Dr. Beth Trammell, and I’m sharing a simple, therapy-informed way to plan a season that actually matches your life: your work schedule, your home projects, your relationships, and the kind of rest you want to feel when fall arrives. We start with practical goal setting that works. If your goals sound like “...

Send us Fan Mail Most conflict doesn’t end a relationship. The lack of repair does. I’m joined by Paula Yost, a rare blend of attorney and licensed clinical mental health therapy supervisor, to talk about what she sees when people walk into a law office on the worst day of their lives and why legal training often misses the trauma, grief, anxiety, and mental illness sitting right in front of it. W...

Send us Fan Mail Grief can feel like a private storm, but it’s also one of the most universal experiences we share and it doesn’t only arrive after a death. I sit down with licensed professional counselor and advanced grief counseling specialist Jillian Oetting to name the kinds of loss that often get ignored: anticipatory grief with dementia or terminal illness, disenfranchised grief after pregna...

Send us Fan Mail Your body reacts before your brain can explain it and that can feel confusing, embarrassing, or downright discouraging. We sit down with licensed therapist Laura Sgro to make the “nervous system” conversation concrete, starting with what people usually mean online: the autonomic nervous system that drives automatic functions like breathing, heart rate, digestion, and your threat r...

Send us Fan Mail Success can be a brilliant strategy and a brutal one. When you’re wired for performance, you can push through pain, outwork exhaustion, and even “do therapy” like it’s another assignment. But what happens when the grind starts costing you sleep, intimacy, health, and the ability to feel anything at all? We sit down with Dr. Akua K. Boateng to unpack the high achiever mindset and t...

Send us Fan Mail One small request can feel like a breaking point when you’ve already been carrying too much and you’re not sure where the extra capacity is supposed to come from. We sit with that exact moment, the “I’m quitting everything” feeling, and unpack why it shows up for so many people across work, parenting, relationships, and caregiving. When overwhelm hits, it’s rarely about the final...

Send us Fan Mail You can ask for something small, like a knock before someone enters your space, and suddenly you’re defending your character, calming their emotions, and questioning your own reality. That spiral is not a personal failure, it’s often a predictable pattern in relationships with emotionally immature parents and other emotionally immature people. We talk about why “just set a boundar...

Send us Fan Mail Social media can connect parents to real support and still leave us feeling exhausted, behind, and strangely ashamed. We sit down with therapist, perinatal mental health specialist, educator, and mom rage researcher Nicole McNelis to name what’s actually happening to parents when the scroll becomes a reflex. No scare tactics, no moralizing, just a grounded conversation about why t...

Send us Fan Mail Therapy collaboration gets praised constantly, yet most people never hear what it actually costs, what it risks, and what it can unlock for clients when it’s done with care. I sit down with Essence and Emily Deming-Rivers, two married licensed psychologists who collaborate inside the same practice, to talk through the real mechanics of integrated care: trust, confidentiality, info...

Send us Fan Mail If you’re great at therapy but secretly uneasy about money, marketing, or the sheer logistics of running a practice, this conversation is for you. We sit down with Nicole Liloia, LCSW, to talk about what actually makes a private practice sustainable, not just inspiring on paper. Because “I didn’t get into this for the money” can be true, and it can still lead straight to burnout i...

Send us Fan Mail Most of us were taught to talk about emotions with the same six words, then we wonder why conflict keeps repeating and connection feels hard. I sit down with licensed marriage and family therapist Tatiana Rojas to slow the whole thing down and get practical: what’s the difference between emotions, feelings, and moods, and why does that difference change the way we communicate, par...

Send us Fan Mail Want your desire back without pretending you’re who you were at 22? We sit down with therapist and sex therapist Brooke Bray Love to unpack how midlife women can rekindle pleasure by changing the script—less waiting to feel “spontaneous,” more creating conditions where desire can actually show up. Brooke brings two decades of clinical experience and a candid voice to topics most p...

Send us Fan Mail Ever find yourself thinking, “Why are we here again?” when a familiar argument fires up? We dig into the hidden patterns that run your relationship on autopilot, and we show how to replace blame with growth by building emotional safety first. With Liz—an Emotionally Focused Therapy clinician, supervisor, and group practice owner—we trace the domino effect inside conflict: the trig...

Send us Fan Mail Start with joy, stay for the honesty. We open with a decades-strong book club that thrives on simple rules—one host, one book, one clean bathroom—and use it as a living example of how small, consistent structures create deep connection. That same clarity shows up in therapy: reliability, presence and a shared space where stories can land without judgment. Michele Mani, a registere...

Send us Fan Mail Forget the checklist of letters and numbers. The real predictor of a strong start to school is whether a child feels safe, can settle their body, and can use words to get their needs met. We walk through a practical, research-aligned way to rethink kindergarten readiness so families spend time on what actually moves the needle in a real classroom. Across the conversation, we share...

Send us Fan Mail Ever notice how your best boundary script disappears the second your parent’s name lights up your phone? We dig into why that happens and what to do next, blending lived experience with clinical insight to make sense of fawning, conditioned guilt, and the body’s fierce loyalty to old safety strategies. Our guest, licensed professional counselor Jessica Van der Merwe, specializes i...

Send us Fan Mail Ever catch yourself packing everyone’s lunches, smoothing every conflict at work, and composing the perfect text so no one gets upset—then wonder why you’re exhausted and resentful? We dig into the quiet engine behind that burnout: overfunctioning, the reflex to manage other people’s needs, emotions, and outcomes at the expense of your own. With therapist and maternal mental healt...

Send us Fan Mail What if the best way to serve clients starts with taking care of the therapist’s body in the room? We sit down with Destiny Davis and Dr. Victoria Rodriguez to challenge one of the field’s quiet myths: that clinician comfort is a distraction. Through lived experience and clinical expertise, they lay out a clearer path where water breaks, seating, pacing, and boundaries aren’t extr...

Send us Fan Mail In case you missed it, I'm reposting this episode because it seems to come up over and over and over. Even if you've listened before, maybe hearing it again will bring fresh light.  Ever say the “right thing” and watch it land the wrong way? We unpack three phrases that sound supportive but often sting—calm down, everything happens for a reason, and let me know if you ne...

Send us Fan Mail Reposting again in case you missed it! These things are common in my practice and everyday clinical encounters. Hoping they resonate for you also. :) Ever wish a single sentence could lower the volume, keep your boundary, and actually teach a skill? We dig into three phrases nearly every adult has used with kids—“Because I said so,” identity-laced labels, and “There’s no reason to...