The Susan Winter Show

Your partner's the one who urged you to move ahead in your relationship. Now, they're the one who's backed away. Why? Here's what happened and here are your options.

Amber writes, “Hi Susan, What do you think about contacting an ex to call them out for being cruel upon breaking up? To get some things off my chest after about a month of no contact and since it's become obvi he's back together with his ex (he tried to play it off like he'd met someone new and told me I just "didn't have it"). I know this isn't true, but it keeps ringing in my ears and I'm still...

Viewer Ger R writes, “Hi Susan. Please do a video about bringing up the topic of being exclusive. How long before wanting this is reasonable? And, with that conversation, I would think that removing our profiles is appropriate to be part of the discussion. I can understand not dismantling it but it can be kept off of circulation. If your partner never asks to be exclusive and you feel the relation...

Heather L writes, “Hi Susan! I am gaining so much value and clarity from your content. It's helping me improve my relationships with other people, and helping me improve my self-esteem. In one of your videos, you discuss a client that had an inner dialogue of "If I am really, really good... maybe you will like me back." I find myself falling into this pattern. How can I tip the teeter-totter, as y...

Not sure what's required in order to take your summer fling through to the fall? Here are two solid tips that create the greatest possibility for your partnership to continue through cuffing season and beyond.

Roger writes, “Dear Susan, I am dating a mother of two right now and she is 35 and I am 25. Anyway, she really wants to enjoy life at the moment because she left a relationship of 10 years about 6 months ago. We had sex recently, but she starts to resist it now. I really get the feeling that she starts to get too attached and is afraid of that feeling. I really want a future with her how do I pace...

Christopher writes, ”Hi Susan. I have admired your work here helping others find confidence in relationships. And I do have a question. Is it true to say that most women want rich successful business type man or ones with good prestigious career pathways? Would it be true to say that as a man who has neither of those (not a good job and not running a successful business) does that mean that I may...

Emotional meltdowns can be observed, honored, processed and packaged. Here's to reroute an internal upset in real time so that you can move forward and get back to a positive mindset.

Emmy writes, “I'm 25 and have gone on many dates with wonderful men. There is attraction, great conversation, but always seems to be something missing. Is it possible to be so happy, independent and comfortable being alone that even if you meet a great guy it will always be stagnant?  I'm emotionally available and fully appreciate the benefits of being in a relationship but am confused by my const...

Furious with your partner? Though you want to lash out in a text message, this isn't the place to start an argument. Learn the amazing power of ‘waiting' to construct the perfect message, and why that choice creates a favorable outcome for you.

Salvatore writes, “Hello Susan, could you explain the psychology or behavior/reasoning behind "haunting"? It's basically the follow up of ghosting. I was ghosted almost a year ago by a girl I went on a date with and she has ignored me up until now, where she popped up watching my Instagram stories. She is currently in a relationship as well. What could this mean?”

You're ready to walk, so why not experiment by enacting 'new ways of being' while you remain with your partner? This is the ‘golden time' to break the negative patterns and try something novel.

Lawrence writes, “Hi Susan. My wife and I have separated and she's sleeping around and meeting men off dating sites. She suffers from alcohol abuse stemming from a traumatic childhood. I'd love her to fix this and us be a family my heart keeps wanting to reach out. Is there anything I can do to get her to realise and her tackle her problems and issues or is that something she must see alone?”

A ‘Band Aid' relationship is neither good nor bad. It's a get-by type of romantic construct that demands little of its participants. One or both partners are marking time and treading water. The point is to identify if you're in a ‘Band Aid' relationship, just in case you're the partner who wants forward movement.

Wondering why your partner's taking so long to trust you? Here's how to figure out if it's something you're doing to create this situation, or if it's an underlying issue that belongs to (and benefits) your partner.

Johnny writes, “Hello Susan. First I wanted to thank you for all your precious advice. My relationship with a man I'm dating is moving forward and my insecurities are coming to the surface. I'm a young man and the guy I'm dating is older than me, very attractive and put together, and I still feel very uneasy around him. Do you have any pieces of advice for me to try to overcome my personal anguish...

Charlotte writes, “Hi Susan. Thank you for all of your wonderful, wise advice in your YouTube videos. You clearly have a gift in understanding human nature. Please may I ask - if you meet a guy that you feel inexplicably drawn to in less than ideal circumstances and with clear obstacles in the way, is this the Universe's way of telling you're way off the mark and that it's a “no-no?” Thanks so muc...

External factors can collide with your inner world to set you up for emotional obsession — even when you're a rational person.  This creates insecurity, and a heightened dependency on a partner. Learn what those situations are, and how to avoid this negative loop.

Dustin writes, “Hi Susan. I got out of a very toxic relationship 6 months ago. My ex broke up with me. She has bpd. I've been through a lot emotionally post breakup. I know for my salvation I need to move on from her but I still find myself painfully longing this person. How do I move on? I'm terrified that my next relationship will be just as painful if not worse. How do I feel good again and tru...

Have you made it easy for your partner to devalue your worth? If so, here's what you did wrong and here's how to make it right. Learn the inner workings of person who takes their partner for granted, and how the non-prioritized partner gets stuck in the loop of believing their false promises.

Laetitia writes, “Hi Susan,Thank you for all your fabulous advice. So helpful! Here is my question: how to know when to give a chance to some one?”Is there someone you're considering dating? Here are the questions you need to ask yourself in order know if this person is someone you'd like to know more intimately. This worries me lots! We talked about both wanting something serious.”

Anna writes, “Hi Susan. Hope all is well. I've been improving myself so much, thanks to all of your break up videos. I have one question: What should I do if my partner has "The grass is greener" syndrome? He broke up with me out of the blue, turned into a different person. He has a girlfriend now, but begs me to talk to him whenever I cut the cord. But when I mention commitment, he pulls away? Th...

Is your spiritual practice weakening your romantic boundaries and making your ‘go blind' to an unhealthy partnership? The overwhelming love that occurs from devoted spiritual awareness is magnificent, but may leave you confused as to how to integrate self-esteem and boundaries in the real world. Here's your guide to that integration.

Petter Fagerlund writes, “Should you try to resolve an ambivalent situation, that might be characterized as hot and cold, by being open or are you jeopardizing the relationship by doing so?”

Tanya writes, “Should previous relationship history matter? I met this guy on tinder and we had such an awesome first date! We clicked right away and I felt comfortable. One of my good friends knows him. My friend did a bit of a background check for me and found out from a source he's been in and out of many relationships and might be a player. This worries me lots! We talked about both wanting so...