The Self Help Antidote

Send a text In this episode Tiffanee and I tackle some of the more significant existential questions in life.  And some hilariously trivial ones as well.  Regardless of how we interpret our lives and the larger world around us, what is one central responsibility we all share?  If we construct our lives through imagination, observation, and endeavor, that makes us all artists relative to our experi...

Send a text This is a special episode.  I get to speak with my friend, mentor and former boss, Neal Spruce.  I was working in my first management role in the health and fitness industry.  Our company, a small Gold’s Gym chain in the New York/New Jersey area, took on a new program, APEX Fitness. n We were looking to offer a more complete nutritional solution to our members.  I was sent to a five-da...

Send a text As usual me and Tiffanee covered a lot of ground in this episode.  By a lot of ground, I mean ADHD driven banter with a caffeine chaser.   However, some poignant topics explored in our conversation include the reasons why your story matters.  We love stories.  We are connected to each other through song, film, novels, biographies and of course our favorite public speakers.  But not all...

Send a text Nowadays the word infectious understandably has some negative connotations.  What we are talking about in this episode however, is how we can powerfully impact others by deepening our understanding of ourselves.   When we better understand and acknowledge why we do what we do, it gives us the insight and compassion to better relate to others.  The ability to cultivate a deeper relation...

Send a text We all struggle with thought patterns that cause us frustration.  Sometimes these thoughts can be debilitating.   Years ago my friend Paul Taylor gave me a book "Brain Lock", by Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz.  The 4 steps outlined in that book helped me with a couple of the more stressful aspects of Tourette's.   You may not suffer from Tourette's or clinical Obsessive Compu...

Send a text What if the pursuit of happiness is the thing that stops us from experiencing it?  Have you ever wondered if the ideas that are so often advocated by the self-help industry might just be bad advice?   My guest for this episode is Dr. Daniel Ellenberg.  He is an author, speaker, leadership coach and psychotherapist.   In our conversation we discussed the need for real connection.  What...

Send a text Humorist Josh Billings supposedly quipped, "it ain't so much people's ignorance that does the harm as their knowing so darned much that ain't so."  Our knowledge and beliefs create the mental maps we use to navigate though life.  But what happens when those maps are wrong, leading us astray?  How do our cognitive biases limit us or even do us harm?   Sometimes...

Send a text Things are not always what they seem.  What is reality? Your reality is shaped by your experiences and you interpret them.  The same is true for others.  In fact, we are all having distinct experiences, because we’re all different.  Do you ever feel that rather than being an active creator of your reality, other people’s perspective of reality is being imposed upon you; leaving you stu...

Send a text What does it take to get good at something?  What is your style and rate of learning?  Is one better than the other?  What are the keys to developing the skills necessary to mastery your craft?  And, when is it time to quit?   This week Tiff and I discuss what it takes to master the art of mastery.    Enjoy! Visit us at: www.theselfhelpantidote.com

Send a text In this episode Dr. Robb Kelly shares insights from his work and from his own personal experience about the realities of struggling with addiction.  His uncle gave him his first drink when he was just nine years old.  When I asked him how he defined addiction he said it was “a mental obsession with an aspect of physicality.”  An obsession that addicts will pursue to the detriment of th...

Send a text Where does life and leadership intersect?  In this episode Tiff and I talk about why there is no delineation between business and life.  Pine and Gilmore in their book “The Experience Economy” authors Pine and Gilmore state that “work is theatre, and every business is a stage.”   We wholeheartedly believe this.  Work is an expression of what we value most in life.  There are important...

Send a text If you think about any story that has inspired you, offered you critical insight or shaped you in some meaningful way, it was basically about a protagonist who faced and overcame a series of challenges, and in resolving them, transforms himself or herself.   But what about you?  What’s your story?  What are you willing to struggle for? To strive for?  What adversity have you had to fac...

Send a text We all have painful chapters in our life story.  Some far more than others, which makes the burdens we carry are particularly heavy.  Our pain, suffering and personal histories feel like enormous weights we drag through our lives.  While our experiences without question can have a profound affect us, they don’t have to define us.  Your current condition is not your conclusion.  Meaning...

Send a text How do you not only overcome the darkest moments of despair in your life, but grow and become more as a result of them?   I wanted to bring this guest on for this episode for a couple of reasons.  Not just because she’s accomplished a lot or because she works in a space, I am interested in.  Which, to be fair, she has and does. All of us, whether we realize it or not, like it or not, a...

Send a text How well do we really know ourselves?  Would we be kinder, even place greater value on an individual’s life if we believed they were like us?   Are we capable of acts of cruelty, irrationality, and injustices that we would never admit to?  Especially to ourselves?   We all have biases.  Yet, it’s only when we have the ability as well as the willingness to recognize those biases that we...

Send a text What are you capable of?  When you look back two years from now, what will most define you?  What will you be most proud of?  Our guest for this episode asserts that you’ll never realize how valuable you are until you own your business, and your life.   Chris Williams is a successful Business Coach, Entrepreneur, and host of the Podcast “The World According to Chris.”   I loved talking...

Send a text Why do humans lie?  And, when if ever is lying the right thing to do?  These are the questions we explore, and more.  Such as, what is Tiffanee's favorite film and what characters do her clients remind her of?  All in this suspension packed episode!   Enjoy Visit us at: www.theselfhelpantidote.com

Send a text I liked my guest for this episode so much I married her.   Aimiende Negbenebor Sela is an award-winning film maker with a heart and talent for telling stories that give voice to the often-voiceless aspects of our inner lives.  She explores our vulnerabilities and the things that make us most human, connecting us to each other.  Her motto is that “we are all living the same lives, just...

Send a text Are you nice or are you kind?   Nice is not necessarily kind.  While some nice people are authentically kind, that’s not always the case.  Equally, not everyone who is kind, is nice.  Nice is a personality trait that’s often confused with virtue.  Kindness is not about having an amiable personality.  It’s about being acutely aware of the needs of others in a way that is deeply empathet...

Send a text If you've ever purchased a self-help book, attended a seminar, watched a video or listened to an audio program on affirmations, you may have been promised everything from financial freedom, the body of your dreams, to the perfect relationship.  But do affirmations really work?   Visit us at: www.theselfhelpantidote.com

Send a text Dr. Viktor Frankl said that “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” But is that true?  Are our thoughts being hijacked?  If so, by whom?  And what role are we playing in our own conformity?   In this episode, inspired by Eric Hoffer’s “The True Believer”, me a...

Send a text Trauma wounds us, all too often those injuries run deep.  It shapes us, on a cognitive and emotional level.  Yet, it does not have to define us.   In this episode I speak with author, entrepreneur, and wellness practitioner Tasha Walker.  Influenced by her own struggles with childhood adversity Latasha (Tasha) has dedicated her life to helping others heal.  We talked about the meaning...

Send a text After much positive feedback around our last episode “Games People Play”, me and Tiff are back for part two.  Among the many things we discuss, we explore 3 psychological motivations behind the games that people play with us as well as the games we play (let’s be honest) with others, as we all strive for meaning, identity and ways to meet our most basic human needs.   In review, last w...

Send a text Do you know anyone who seems to be addicted to drama?  Don’t answer that, we already know.   But why do we keep having the same conflicts with certain people over and over?  What’s the problem, and are we playing a role in it, even if unwittingly? In this episode me and Tiff’s discussion into the Games People Play was inspired by the late Psychiatrist Eric Berne, pioneer of Transaction...

Send a text Failure is not only an unavoidable part of success, but also an essential aspect of learning, growth, and development.  In the right context, it can also add novelty to our lives, deepen our perception, challenge us, and elevate our creativity.  You could say that the road to expertise is paved with failure.   Join me and Tiff for our discussion on common beliefs and misconceptions abo...