The Real Marriage Podcast

Nothing gets you into the holiday spirit more than some family drama. Let's face it.  We all deal with some kind of tension when it comes to our families.  It could be a broken relationship, some challenging in-laws or even something one person said years ago that still lingers in the back of your mind.  And for whatever reason family drama can be the worst kind.  As much as you try to get ov...

Purpose – the reason for which something is done or created.  The reason for which something exists. Everyone wants to know their purpose.  We want to understand why we exist and how we bring value to this world. Whether it be through work, parenting, our marriage or how we serve people we strive to know and feel like we are valuable.   We have to know that our life has meaning. In this episode yo...

When things are going wrong we all cling to something.  How is this season going for you?  The pandemic is continuing to linger, the election has been predictably stressful and life in general seems to be confusing and at times, overwhelming.  Of course, most of this is out of our control and we can't do a whole lot to change it.  So, what do we do?  In this episode you will hear Griffin and...

How intimate is your marriage? Intimacy is key to every marriage.  The basic definition of intimacy is "closeness."  Many have broken this idea into four categories: spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. While we all strive to be more intimately connected to our spouse we have to understand that there are subtle ways to kill intimacy in your marriage.  This episode brings li...

How does money impact your marriage? Research has found that money issues are one of the top five reasons for divorce.  And one study found that finances are one of the top two issues couples fight about.  Most likely, money has become an issue in your relationship for one reason or another.  So, knowing that, how can we approach money in a way that doesn't ruin our marriages?  Listen and hea...

What comes to your mind when you hear the word forgiveness? Most of us think of a time when someone hurt us.  They said something or did something that left a mark.  Maybe it was a family member, your spouse or even a decision you made yourself that created a reason to bring unforgiveness into your life. Forgiveness is hard but it is essential.  It's essential because choosing not to forgive...

Can two people really fall out of love? It’s a really good question.  No one gets married and doesn’t think they are in love.  No one really believes five or ten years down the road it isn’t going to work out and you will be looking to start over fresh away from your spouse. However, it is something you hear about.  “We aren’t in love anymore.”  “We have just grown apart.”  “It’s just better to go...

Is your bedroom sacred? Before you google what that even means think for a moment about the culture of your home.  We all create an environment in our home every day and we should be intentional about what environment is being formed. So, when it comes to your bedroom it may be the most important area for your marriage.  It's where "the magic happens", it's where important deci...

How do you deal with your stress? It's a good question.  Unfortunately, it's not one we ask enough of ourselves.  Stress is simply unavoidable.  The nature of our lives creates so many challenges and difficulties that stress is inevitable.  It can come from finances, work, family relationships, uncertainty of your future, and the list goes on. Stress impacts your marriage all the time. ...

Would you like to have better sex?  Okay, don’t answer out loud.  But, let’s be honest about a few things.  Sex is important.  And we want it to be really good because it helps our marriage. So what does that really look like?  The world we live in loves to celebrate all kinds of sex outside of the marriage covenant.  It's almost as if to say that sex within marriage is one of the least excit...

We all need a rhythm. Think about it.  We love music when it's in a rhythm. When the rhythm of a song is off we can't connect with it.  Even if the words are powerful we need the rhythm to be spot on. Have you ever thought that we are the same way with our marriage and our own individual lives?  When your lives are out of rhythm everything is affected.  Maybe you don't feel as healt...

Let's talk about divorce. We've all heard the statistics that show somewhere near 50% of marriages end in divorce in America.  While that number is staggering it also seems as if it's just become common knowledge in our culture.  Simply put, no-one who gets married believes it will end in divorce but so many couples eventually end up walking away from each other.  Many of us grew up...

Most of us dream of having children.  Starting a family and raising up the next generation behind us gives us so much value and creates the legacy we leave behind.  When you are first married its fun to talk about how many kids you want to have and building a list of potential names creates excitement as you look ahead to your future family.  Of course, having kids changes so much.  And like so ma...

Each of you has a role to play.  Have you ever been on a team or in an organization where you didn't fully understand your role?  The coach or boss had high expectations for you but you had no idea how to live up to them.  You didn't have any clarity on what it meant to succeed or help the organization move forward.  It's a frustrating place to be. It's no different in marriage...

How well do you handle your weaknesses? Marriage has a crazy way of bringing out both the best and the worst of you.  You really are on full display with the person you love the most and it can truly be humbling. Last week Heather spoke about her struggle with knowing her identity and the impact that has had on her life and her marriage. This week it's Griffin's turn.  You will hear Grif...

No one likes to focus on their weakness. In fact, we would much rather focus on someone else's issues so we don't necessarily have to face our own.  While that is a normal defense mechanism for all of us it might cause you to miss out on something special. If marriage has taught us one thing its that neither of us are perfect.  Not that we thought we were but now we know we are far from...

Something happened with us recently. It was a regular night.  We were in bed hanging out like usual and then we just started talking about our story.  We went back years to even before we met.  We walked through how we got together and even dug into some of the harder parts of our story. It was incredible.  Why?  Because it showed us how far we have come.  How much we have walked through, overcome...

It's safe to say that most of us feel like life can be overwhelming.  Forget the fact that we are in a pandemic and chaos is constantly happening in our world.  Our schedule, responsibilities and everyday life can leave us feeling stressed out and at the end of our selves.  The consequences of that?  It usually impacts not only your individual selves but your relationship with the people clos...

What does a wife really want from her husband? Last week's episode unpacked the importance of respect.  Every man wants to be respected.  And this week, Griffin and Heather touch on how every woman wants to be loved well in her marriage. It sounds broad and simplistic doesn't it?  But when you dig a little deeper you realize that different seasons of a woman's life produce a need fo...

What does every husband want? Of course, one thing comes to mind immediately, but that's too obvious!  Let's dig deeper than that.  Every husband has a desire that is a key ingredient to a healthy marriage.  It's something a man is not only looking for but hoping for because it is directly tied to their worth and overall value.  So, what is it? Respect. That's right, every man...

How high are your expectations? Have you ever been disappointed in your spouse because they didn't live up to standard you had for them?  Have you ever let your self down because you didn't accomplish something you set out to do? We all understand expectations.  We carry them with us everyday in every situation we are in.  We also love to place them on ourselves and others.  Think about...

It's been a season like no other. In fact, we may never go through something like this again.  At least, let's hope that is the case! The quarantine put life on hold and it also altered our everyday lives in ways many of us probably didn't anticipate.  We had to work from home, homeschool our kids, avoid most public places and try to follow the ever-changing news that seemed to be d...

You didn't want to be in this situation. Life is hard as it is so when we face a difficulty such as the coronavirus we really find ourselves searching for answers.  And, if the virus isn't impacting you as much, it may be a financial challenge, marriage challenges or financial uncertainty.  In other words, we all walk through bad situations. So, how can we make the most of it?  How can w...

Sometimes life throws you a curveball. The unexpected happens and you simply weren't ready for it.  As much as you planned ahead, thought things through and tried to anticipate sometimes life hits hard. The world has come to a halt because of the coronavirus.  It is impacting everyone of us in different ways.  And at different times in our lives we will be hit with unexpected challenges that...

Hindsight is 20/20. As amazing as it is to be engaged and in the newlywed stage there is so much you don't know about yourself, each other and marriage in general.  And you better believe the longer you are married the more you learn.  And some of it you just have to learn the hard way. Listen and hear some powerful truths Griffin and Heather have learned in nine years that they wish they kne...