The Psychology of your 20s

Sometimes all we want to do is a have a big, old fashioned sob and when we can't it leads us feeling emotionally pent up, defective and frustrated. There's an explanation for why we go through periods where we are unable to cry. In today's episode we discuss:  The evolutionary function of crying Crying as an attachment behaviour  The difference between basal, reflex and emotional tears  The 4 majo...

Self discipline is the key ingredient to unlocking everything you want in life. But despite that many of us treat it like its optional and believe the narrative that self discipline requires perfection, requires sacrifice and is too hard. Actually, self discipline is anything but, it is actually the road of least resistance. In this episode we break down 5 tips for building self discipline in any...

Love is scary. There are so many opportunities to be hurt, to be let down, to have thing turn out in a way we never wanted them to. But it's also one of the best things in live and brings incredible joy and fulfilment. Why is it that some of us avoid the experience all together. In today's episode we are going to discuss the fear of intimacy in all its forms. We will discuss:  Signs you have a fea...

This International Women's Day as part of iHeart's Women Take the Mic Initiative, I'm bringing on my Mum for a vulnerable chat about our relationship as mother and daughter, what she's learned from being a mother, what she would do differently, life lessons and her success in a male dominated field. We discuss everything from motherhood, child-parent dynamics, feminism and career advice. It's a be...

This week we are discussing the ups and downs of living alone in your 20s: from the freedom and independence, to the loneliness and social isolation, financial anxiety and stress, but the authenticity and emotional maturity that comes with it. We talk about:  Why being alone doesn't make you lonely Sliders versus deciders - why you should wait before moving in with a partner Cognitive distortions...

Feeling jealous over our partners past can feel highly irrational, but its still a feeling many of us have and contributes to a lot of obsessive and unhealthy behaviours like stalking their exes, asking intrusive questions, starting arguments in hopes of getting the reassurance we need. In today's episode, we talk about the psychology of retroactive jealousy, including its origins and how to move...

Panic attacks are awful, they sneak up on us in the worst moments and make us feel overwhelmed by an invisible fear. In today's episode we are going to talk through the psychology of panic attacks including:  Why they occur? Panic disorders vs. panic attacks  The flight, fight, freeze or fawn response The car alarm analogy  The function of anxiety and panic Anxiety avoidance vs. acceptance 7 evide...

It's my birthday. Let's talk about my fear of growing older.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thepsychologyofyour20s      See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Our 20s are one of the best times for us to change careers. Perhaps you're feeling burntout, bored, unmotivated, craving something bigger, something with purpose or better hours, a change from the life and job you currently have. In this episode we break down how we can change careers in our 20s, some of the challenges, how to manage the financial insecurity, the signs your old job is not right fo...

Acne has just as many emotional and mental symptoms as it does physical. Having acne in our 20s is a significant source of insecurity, frustration and hopelessness, impacting how we go about making new friends, dating, career opportunities and so much more. In this episode we break down the psychology of acne, investigating the myths about the causes of acne, the subsequent stigma towards acne, th...

Sustaining a relationship has a lot more to do with the division of domestic, emotional and physical labour. A massive component is the mental load - the additional energy that goes into organising, scheduling and managing the daily tasks, chores and things that need to be done whilst also accounting for your partners needs. It's not a secret that women carry a lot more of the mental load than the...

The end of a relationship or a friendship can leave us with a lot of unanswered questions, especially when the split is sudden, out of the blue, and the other person is unresponsive. In other instances, we don't quite know what went wrong and are looking for answers. In today's episode we talk about the elusive myth that is closure: whether we need it, how to get it, and why we should not rely on...

A considerable question for those of us in our 20s is how do we create a good life? What does it mean to design a life we love and how exactly do we do that? In today's episode we break down five ways we can do this, including:  Deconstructing your old life for your new one + the Odyssey Plan Prototyping your new life + the 15 minute rule  Addition through subtraction  Pursue daily joy  Positive f...

Sometimes we become more attached to the idea of someone and their potential, than the reality of who they actually are. We begin to project our wants and desires on to them and ignore the red flags, the disappointments, the truth. This is what we call fantasy bonding and it prevents us from seeing someone for who they truly are, causes us to be lead along and invest in the wrong people. In this e...

Anger is one of our most primal emotions and yet we have no idea how to manage it. We suppress it, allowing it to rule our lives; we hide from it, we let it explode onto people who don't deserve our rage. In this episode we break down the psychology of anger and why anger is often a secondary emotion, masking our true fear, anxiety and insecurity. We explore how to manage our anger, use it for fue...

Two of the most noteworthy elements of our 20s are dating and our experiences with mental health. They also interact - our mental health will influence how we date, how we deal with rejection, how we meet new people, and subsequently, our dating experiences can have a profound impact on our mental health. In this episode we dissect everything about this interaction and how we can take care of our...

Being able to travel and explore the world in our 20s is such a unique privilege, but sometimes we can overdo a good thing and hit a point of complete emotional, mental and physical exhaustion, causing us to want to go home early, abandon our trip or enjoy our travels a lot less. In this episode we break down the psychology behind travel burnout, why it occurs, what it says about our human need to...

We experience chronic guilt towards a lot of things: guilt for resting, guilt for not resting, guilt for prioritising ourselves, guilt for being a bad friend, a bad partner, a bad student, for not deserving your opportunities. In today's episode we break down the guilt complex by exploring:  The childhood guilt wound People pleasing  The fawn response  Perfectionism  Negative self esteem  We also...

In today's episode we are going to discuss the psychology behind our health anxiety, something we don't speak about enough in our 20s. Health anxiety leaves us feeling incredibly hypervigilant to symptoms or feelings in our body that could indicate a life threatening illness or impending death, even if they are just a projection or derived from stress. This comes from our need to feel in control o...

Getting into a new relationship can bring up a lot of past trauma from previous relationships, and cause a lot of self sabotage or anxiety, resulting in behaviours such as:  Emotional unavailability Knit picking behaviour  Starting unnecessary fights  Stone walling  Pushing people away  Ignoring red flags  In this episode we answer the question "do you need to completely heal before entering into...

Many of us find ourselves obsessively focused on the opinions and judgements of others, letting their opinion of us influence our sense of self worth and confidence. However, true power and success comes when we embrace the courage to be disliked and recognise that the negative words of others come from their own insecurity, rather than as a reflection of us. In this episode we break down this con...

Alcohol is a drug, highly addictive, has proven to do damage to our minds and our bodies and yet makes up a huge part of our 20s, especially how we socialise and connect with others. In today's episode we are going to talk about the psychology of alcohol, the impact of alcohol on our brains, the influence our social circles and friendships have on our drinking habits, hangiexty, binge drinking and...

Welcome to 2024! With each new year on the podcast, we set a new theme or intention for the next 12 months. This year our theme is RISK, embracing our fear of change or making a mistake and embracing risk in all its forms! We discuss how we can get a better idea of what we want for our future, discover our purpose, what type of risks will get us there, the difference between bounded and unbounded...

Dating with an anxious attachment style comes with a number of challenges: struggling to feel secure, requiring constant reassurance, mistrust, a fear of abandonment, feeling unworthy of love or difficulty setting boundaries. But your attachment style is not a life sentence, it is something you can challenge and heal by embracing vulnerability, healthy love, boundary setting and applying the love...

Feeling stuck and dissatisfied with where you are in your life is never a place we want to be in. Perhaps you are contemplating a major life change - moving to a new city, quitting your job, leaving a long term relationship - that you believe will be the antidote to your future happiness and fulfilment. Psychology shows that this might not always be the case. Wanting to change something about our...