Jack Shitama
The Non-Anxious Leader Podcast
The Non-Anxious Leader Podcast uses a family systems theory approach to increase your spiritual, emotional and physical well-being so you can be the best leader possible. Each episode explores research and practical tips to help you be a personal and professional non-anxious presence.
Author
Jack Shitama
Category
Podcast website
Latest episode
Jul 6, 2026
Where to listen?
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Episodes
Episode 114: Storytime-Put Your Own Oxygen Mask on First 15.03.2021 14:28
While others may panic during anxious times, non-anxious leaders are able to focus on taking responsibility for self. Show Notes: Friedman's Fables Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails.
Episode 113: Storytime-How to Deal with Hypersensitive People 08.03.2021 16:17
Enabling hypersenstive people will result in their feeling entitled, which will take its toll on us. This episode shows how to handle things more effectively. Show notes: Friedman's Fables Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website.
Episode 112: Storytime-To Avoid Resistance Stay in Your Lane 01.03.2021 14:03
"'Round in Circles" from Friedman's Fables illustrates the problems with focusing on what other people should do. Show Notes: Friedman's Fables by Edwin Friedman Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website.
Episode 111: Storytime-The Power of the Dependent 22.02.2021 16:01
Edwin Friedman's book, Friedman's Fables , is an entertaining way to learn family systems theory. In this episode, I read the first fable, "The Bridge," and unpack the concept of the leverage of the dependent. Show Notes: Friedman's Fables by Edwin Friedman Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website.
Episode 110: Not All Conflicts Are Equal 15.02.2021 12:58
Knowing the difference between different types of conflicts and how to handle them is key to being a non-anxious leader. This episode shows you how. Show Notes: 3 Types of Conflict and How to Address Them by Katie Shonk Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don't Know by Adam Grant The Science of Reasoning With Unreasonable People by Adam Grant Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious...
Episode 109: Self-Differentiation Is Not Selfishness 08.02.2021 14:10
Self-differentiation is sometimes confused with selfishness. This episode looks at the concepts of ego and ego-strength to show the difference. Show Notes: Egomania vs. ego strength by Seth Godin Ego Versus Ego-Strength: The Characteristics of a Healthy Ego and Why It's Essential to Your Happiness by Athena Staik, Ph. D. Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to...
Episode 108: Five Steps to Better Self-Regulation 01.02.2021 16:57
Encounters with anxious people can make it difficult to control one's own reactivity. These five steps can help you better self-regulate. Show Notes: How to Keep Your Cool in High-Stress Situations by Robert E. Quinn, David P. Fessell, and Stephen W. Porges Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website.
Episode 107: The Power of a Creative Minority 25.01.2021 14:04
A creative minority can change things for the better. Leadership through self-differentiation makes this possible. Show Notes: On Creative Minorities by Jonathan Sacks Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website.
Episode 106: The Importance of a Loyal Opposition 18.01.2021 11:57
Leading through self-differentiation will result in a loyal opposition. This is a good thing and will help you be your best. Show Notes: The Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable by Patrick Lencioni Episode 35: Sabotage and Empathy (What Works and What Doesn’t) Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails.
Episode 105: Is Society Regressing? 11.01.2021 17:54
Societal regression occurs when anxiety increases due to the inability to handle change. This episode looks at the characteristics in light of recent events. Show Notes: A Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix Podcast Episode 28: How to Take a Leadership Stand on Controversial Issues (including a Family Systems take on Donald Trump’s Leadership Style) Podcast Episode 44: Four Ru...
Episode 104: How to Make Your Habits Work for You 04.01.2021 18:36
This episode covers a repeatable process for developing positive habits to improve your spiritual, physical and professional lives. Show Notes: Get your FREE ecopy of One New Habit, One New Goal: Change Your Life in 10 Weeks The ONE Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan The Healthy Habit Revolution: The Step by Step Blueprint to Create Bet...
Episode 103: The Magnet Theory of Emotional Distance 28.12.2020 15:54
Non-anxious leaders create healthy emotional space. The magnet theory helps to understand what this looks like and how to do it. Show Notes: Episode 102: The Problem with Emotional Intensity The Non-Anxious Leader Network Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails.
Episode 102: The Problem with Emotional Intensity 21.12.2020 17:35
Emotional intensity can serve as a clue to the emotional process in a system. This episode starts with examples in child-focused families and then shows how this can help the non-anxious leader. Show Notes: Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue The Non-Anxious Leader Network Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tues...
Episode 101: Family Systems in a Nutshell - A Children's Story 14.12.2020 23:25
The children's story, Bread and Jam for Frances , has all the components of family systems theory. This episode breaks it down. Show Notes: Bread and Jam for Frances by Russell Hoban Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails.
Episode 100: A Family Systems Take on Non-Violent (or Compassionate) Communication - Part 2 07.12.2020 19:26
Non-Violent or Compassionate Communication not only helps us to express our unmet needs, it also helps us to listen to others to identify their unmet needs. Show Notes: Episode 99: A Family Systems Take on Non-Violent (or Compassionate) Communication - Part 1 Family Systems Book Study in The Non-Anxious Leader Network Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my week...
Episode 99: A Family Systems Take on Non-Violent (or Compassionate) Communication - Part 1 30.11.2020 14:44
Marshall Rosenberg developed Non-Violent Communication to better express our own needs and better understand the needs of others. This episode looks at how this complements family systems theory and can help non-anxious leaders communicate more effectively. Show Notes: The Center for Non-Violent Communication "Feelings Inventory" The Center for Non-Violent Communication "Needs Inven...
Episode 98: Non-Anxious Leaders Understand Paradox and Playfulness 23.11.2020 14:25
Edwin Friedman maintained that paradox and playfulness were important to maintaining a non-anxious presence. The leverage of the dependent and the conflict of wills are key concepts to understanding how this works. Show Notes: Friedman's Fables by Edwin H. Friedman Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails.
Episode 97: Your Most Important Role as a Leader 16.11.2020 14:11
Discerning and communicating vision is your most important role as a leader. Doing this well creates focus, as well as reduces anxiety. Understanding family sysytems theory will help you deal effectively with resistance. A note: near the end I say "A little humilty never helps." I meant to say, "A little humility never hurts." Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader...
Episode 96: Five Characteristics of Resilience (and How They Help the Non-Anxious Leader) 09.11.2020 12:09
Resilience not only promotes growth, it enables a leader to maintain a non-anxious presence when facing challenge. Understanding resilience will help you do this more effectively. Show Notes: Episode 92: You Can Change Your Environment or You Can Change Yourself – A Look at Edwin Friedman’s Take on Toxicity and Response Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website.
Episode 95: The Problem with Moral Convictions 02.11.2020 15:10
Moral convictions are important. However, if they aren't managed properly they can have negative consequences. Understanding how they work can help you avoid the negatives so you can be a non-anxious leader. Show Notes: Moral Combat - Hidden Brain Podcast Moral Conviction by Linda J. Skitka, Ph. D. Episode 85: Facts, Beliefs and the Non-Anxious Leader Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxiou...
Episode 94: How Fusion Results in a Herd Mentality 26.10.2020 14:34
Fusion is the loss of self to the norms of another individual or group. Understanding how it works can help the non-anxious leader recognize and avoid a herd mentality. Show Notes: The Center for Family Process Definitions from Bowen Theory from The Family Systems Institute Bowen Theory & Concepts from The Bowen Theory Education Center Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website...
Episode 93: A Family Systems Perspective on Imposter Syndrome 19.10.2020 17:02
Many high achievers suffer from imposter syndrome. Looking at one's own family of origin and taking responsibility for self can help. Show Notes: Imposter syndrome - Wikipedia Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck , Ph. D The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women: Why Capable People Suffer From the Impostor Syndrome and How to Thrive in Spite of It by Valerie Young, Ed. D Imposte...
Episode 92: You Can Change Your Environment or You Can Change Yourself - A Look at Edwin Friedman's Take on Toxicity and Response 12.10.2020 13:23
Edwin Friedman said that the strength of toxicity in a system could be expressed as hostile environment divided by the response of the organizm (HE/RO). This episode unpacks what this means for the non-anxious leader. Show Notes: Toxicity and Response by Edwin Friedman Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails.
Episode 91: The Characteristics of an Authentic Leader 05.10.2020 16:06
The characteristics of an authentic leader show that self-differentiation and authenticity go hand-in-hand. It all comes down to taking responsibility for self. Show Notes: Discovering Your Authentic Leadership by Bill George , Peter Sims , Andrew N. McLean and Diana Mayer Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails.
Episode 90: How Self-Awareness and Intentionality Foster Self-Differentiation 28.09.2020 20:55
This episode defines self-awareness and intentionality, as well as how they help us work towards self-differentiation. Show Notes: What Self-Awareness Really Is (and How to Cultivate It) by Tasha Eurich Intention and Intentionality , The Coaching Room Episode 35: Sabotage and Empathy (What Works and What Doesn’t) Read the Full Transcript on The Non-Anxious Leader website. Subscribe to my weekly ...
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