The Good Sex Project

New Zealand's Gender Attitudes Survey shows a sharp rise, particularly among young men, in adherence to rape myths and the belief that gender equality has gone too far. Rebecca Stringer, associate professor in gender studies at Otago University, joins Melody to make sense this troubling trend, and unpacks why this isn't as new as it feels (hello, 90s political correctness backlash), what's differe...

Divide your age by two and add seven. It's the rule nobody made up officially, yet somehow everyone knows it. But where did it come from - and does it actually mean anything? This episode pulls apart the age-gap conversation: when a difference in years is genuinely a red flag, when it's simply nobody's business, and how the calculus has shifted across generations and cultures. We look at the power...

Madelaine Thomas had her intimate images leaked without consent while working as a dominatrix -  and couldn't find any technology that would have helped her identify the culprit.  So she built it. A bonus conversation about Image Angel, deepfakes, the shame that lingers even when you did nothing wrong, and funding an anti-abuse startup with sex work. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privac...

Sex work is often called the world's oldest profession. It’s survived moral panics, technological leaps, a global pandemic, and endless political debate. This episode looks at the state of sex work in Aotearoa New Zealand - one of the few countries where it's fully decriminalised - and asks whether legal protection translates to real safety, dignity, and wellbeing. We hear from workers about the r...

Social Psychologist and author Bella DePaulo is 72, single by choice, and has spent decades proving that single life isn't a consolation prize. In this conversation she shares the research on why married people aren't actually happier, how single people get quietly punished, and why "growing old alone" is her fantasy, not her fear. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

From Bridget Jones to #SoloGlowUp, the story of singleness has had a rebrand. But is it liberation - or just a better-looking waiting room? Melody Thomas meets two people sitting with that question. Beth is 42, an extrovert, and someone who loves hard - sometimes too hard. After a five-year relationship that slowly stripped away her sense of self, she's reassessing what she actually wants from a p...

Tom Scott - musician, father, and one of Aotearoa's most compelling voices - joins Melody for a wide-ranging conversation about love, loss, and what it actually takes to change. Tom's album Anitya is the jumping-off point: a record split between the wreckage of a decade-long relationship and the unexpected arrival of new love. But the conversation quickly goes deeper, touching on addiction and sob...

What makes some relationships survive betrayal while others collapse over something small? John and Anna built a life over fifteen years together - then nearly lost it all. Not in one moment, but slowly: new parenthood, creeping distance, alcohol, silence, and eventually repeated infidelity. This episode follows their story through the idea of rupture and repair - the quiet, unglamorous work of me...

You don't have to do anything to become a victim of image-based sexual abuse. AI can now fabricate intimate images from a single photo - and the shame, fear, and coercion that follow are just as real as if it had actually happened. Melody talks to Netsafe's Sean Lyons about deepfakes, sextortion, nudify apps, and the organised crime networks behind them. Essential listening - especially if you hav...

Your data knows who you're attracted to. Your apps are learning how you love. And somewhere, an AI is waiting to be your perfect partner. Dr Rebecca Saunders talks to Melody about sex bots, relationship mediators, and the very human desires fuelling a very profitable industry. Dr Rebecca Saunders' Book Bodies of Work can be bought here Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

AI is no longer just for the workplace - it's reshaping how we flirt, date, fantasise, and experience intimacy. In the Season 3 opener, host Melody Thomas meets two people using AI to navigate their real sex and dating lives: Helen, a 38-year-old early adopter who used AI to hack the Hinge algorithm, and Rob, a happily married 40-year-old from the US Midwest who's been using AI as a "very differen...

Eight episodes diving into the tricky topics - age gaps and AI, betrayal and repair, singleness and shame, sex work and saying things out loud, and the question of what it takes to become an extraordinary lover. Honest, human, funny and sometimes uncomfortable - It’s gonna be a ride! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We meet Charlie, who charts a course through a restrictive childhood, people pleasing, mirroring, and an abusive relationship to thriving as a solo non-monogamous person living with various mental and physical health issues. Can rejecting the ‘rules’ of monogamy help you feel safer, freer, and more yourself? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jasmine and her husband, together since their teens, had just started to reconnect and really learn about intimacy after having kids when Jasmine got a shock diagnosis. While they navigate Jasmine’s health journey, they continue to connect in ways that surprise them.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When he was 14, Chris made a list of the attributes of his dream girlfriend. But as time ticked by, no-one made the grade. He was happy to wait until she appeared… but at some point he realised he was the only virgin on campus. And then M came along - who ticked almost none of his boxes, but was super fun and incredible. What should Chris do?  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more i...

After three kids dulled their once-magnetic sex life, mid-40s couple Sarah and Lane throw out expectations and pressure, un-learn old patterns, add some new tantra tricks to the repertoire and rebuild connection through weekly ‘naked nights’.  Find Libido Liberation on Insta - @libidoliberation Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Good Sex Project will be back in 2026, and we're still looking for some people with specific experiences and stories to speak to. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In association with Ensemble and live from The Village in Auckland, Melody is joined by intimacy and relationship experts Nic Beets and Verity Thom to discuss the vital role of having and re-centering pleasure in our lives.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Bonus alert! In this mini episode, Chloe - who shared her list of "f**keries" in season 1 - leaves a voice memo with a surprising update. Let's stay connected!  Instagram Facebook TikTok        Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this special bonus episode of TGSP, we introduce you to Jemma Bennett, an extraordinary therapist based in Tauranga who goes by 'The Māori Therapist' on Instagram. Jemma shares her deeply moving life story, alongside her professional insights into the cycles of abuse and the complexities of intimate relationships. This episode is a raw, touching, and enlightening exploration of resilience, heal...

Horny stories are having a moment. What is it about them that's got us so thirsty? What makes a good horny storyline good, and a bad one... dismal? And is erotic media just for fun, or does it have the potential to impact our actual sex lives? Melody speaks with "kooky, spooky" romance writer Steff Green, erotic audio maker Ryan Mairs aka Marisyy and Intimacy coordinator Ita O'Brien (Normal People...

Gynaecologist Dr Olivia Smart and Clinical Psychologist Nic Beets talk about some of the physical, sexual, and mental health effects of ageing, including in depth discussion of peri, post, and menopause, and how to support your partner through these changes. They also touch on changes in the male body, and explain why getting older doesn't have to mean the end of a happy, thriving sex life - if yo...

Sex and ageing, we explore the intersection of sexuality, ageing, and personal transformation. Host Melody Thomas delves into stories from those experiencing newfound freedoms and adventures in their later years. From touching accounts of midlife crises to the joy of rediscovery, this episode sheds light on navigating sexual health, menopause, and ultimately, embracing a fulfilling and vibrant lif...

Journalist and author Anke Richter shares her personal journey through the world of neo-tantra and reveals how easy it can be to become entangled in high-demand groups. Tune into this bonus episode for an eye-opening conversation that spans personal diary, investigative journalism, and critical advice on how to navigate these complex dynamics. Let's stay connected!  Instagram Facebook TikTok      ...

Is it possible to have sexual joy and spiritual faith? This episode of The Good Sex Project delves into the impact of purity culture. Phil and Lavinia share their journey from conservative Christian upbringings to embracing a different path for their family. We'll also hear from Chrissy and Mark, whose lives are intertwined with profound lessons about love, faith, and sexual freedom. Let's stay co...