The Feminist Dating Show

If you want to walk into a coffee shop, a bookstore, or a comic book store this summer and actually know how to say hi to someone you find cute, this episode gives you a step-by-step flirting framework you can use the next time you leave your house. Flirting is a buildable skill — not a secret language, not a personality trait. Here is the exact process. Step one: how to open a conversation with a...

If you have zero dating experience and you want to find the right partner, this episode gives you six tools for late bloomers to start dating successfully. From zero experience to finding the right partner, without the patriarchal nonsense or the spiral. Step one is dropping the shame — and the actual skill that makes that possible (hint: it's not positive thinking, and it's not logic) Step two is...

Finding love isn't just luck or timing.   It comes down to two learnable skills. Episode 269 of The Feminist Dating Show breaks both of them down so you can start practicing today.   Inside this episode: ✨ The reason going on more dates won't get you closer to the right person. Dating is not a numbers game. It's an act of self-trust. ✨ Proximity to aligned opportunity: why most people are either...

If you want to date men AND you want to decenter men... This week's episode of The Feminist Dating Show (episode 268) is a giant permission slip. Because most dating advice is telling you to go on more dates, give more people a chance, stop being so picky. And all of that is designed to exhaust you into settling. (and you deserve more) Decentering men doesn't mean never dating a man again. It mean...

Dating in your main character energy means more access to everything you want. More connection. More aliveness. More of the good stuff. It also means more rejection. BOO. Rejection doesn't have to mean anything about you. It's a filter, getting the wrong people out of the way. And the fear of it is one of the top forces stopping people from going after what they want. This episode is your rejectio...

Cora left an unhealthy marriage, deconstructed her entire evangelical upbringing, bought her first house, and raised two 16-year-olds solo. Then she met someone really good on Hinge. Who met all of her essence-based preferences. And she almost talked herself out of it. Not because he did anything wrong. Because she felt ashamed for wanting partnership after working so hard to become independent. I...

If you have a great life and dating just doesn't feel like part of it — this one's for you. In episode 265, I'm coaching Christina live. She's 36, has a great life, one long-term relationship under her belt, and is asking the question a lot of you are quietly asking: is it even worth it to try dating after so much disappointment? She's frustrated by the single tax — the emotional and financial cos...

Here's the secret of flirting... Every single person you've ever wanted to talk to — the cute stranger on the subway, the guy at the coffee shop, the woman you keep seeing at the farmers market — is also in their head. Every. Single. One. And yet most of us walk around convinced that WE are the only ones who are awkward, anxious, and completely clueless about flirting. This week on The Feminist Da...

If you've ever opened a dating app and immediately wanted to throw your phone across the room — this one's for you.   In episode 263 of the Feminist Dating Show, I'm coaching Kayla live. This episode is for you if you relate to any of this:   You open a dating app and immediately spiral into, "What if they make me uncomfortable?" or "what if I say something stupid?" You avoid swiping because judgi...

This one's for you if dating has started to feel like a hamster wheel of painful experiences… and you keep thinking: I've done so much work on myself—why is this still so hard?   In this live session, I coach Quinn through: the loop of type vs. essence-based preferences the fear of being "too much" in dating what to do when uncertainty triggers a full-body spiral how to tell if your "picker is bro...

Have you ever wondered if you're "too late" because dating has never worked the way it seems to work for everyone else?   My client Liz joined Main Character Dating at 38 having never been in a long-term relationship. She felt behind, alone, and unsure how to even do dating.   What shifted for Liz inside Main Character Dating was hope .   No more dating shame.   And an action plan that helped her...

In this episode, I'm sharing my 10 rules of feminist dating—the principles I know actually lead to an equitable, joyful partnership. No matter your past experience (or lack of experience), your age, or your sexuality, these rules are here to help you magnetize the right partner and feel amazing doing it.  These 10 rules are a response to outdated, patriarchal dating advice that teaches you to shri...

In this episode, I'm sharing a transparent update about the podcast: why I decided to rename it  The Feminist Dating Show . I talk through the intention behind the previous name, what I heard from listeners over time, and why I want the podcast name to immediately feel inclusive and clear—especially for people who are new to this work. Feminist dating has always been the value system underneath ev...

If the holidays bring up nerves about being single — the questions, the pressure, the comparisons — this episode is your Holiday Dating Survival Guide . It's a warm, grounding replay packed with self-compassion, boundaries that protect your peace, and real scripts for handling conversations about your dating life. Inside, Lily shares: how to release the self-judgment we've all internalized from pa...

Laura sat on her dream for years. She had already moved abroad, left her marriage, rewritten her book, built a whole new life in a new country… and yet the next thing she actually wanted to build — a business supporting women after divorce — stayed in a drawer. In this conversation, you'll hear exactly how she went from: • paralyzed by fear of judgment • hiding the work she'd been doing for years...

In this episode, Abby shares her late bloomer story with so much honesty and clarity. We talk about what it was like to be in her mid-30s, never having been in a serious relationship, carrying a loud "I'm behind" and "I'm weird" narrative, and feeling totally unsure how to talk about her dating history without spiraling. Abby opens up about moving to a new city, trying to date while feeling embarr...

If you're stuck in a spiral of overthinking — replaying conversations, asking 15 friends what to do, imagining every worst-case scenario — this episode will feel like a deep exhale. Overthinking isn't you being "careful." It's a  self-trust deficit . And that is a  skill gap , not a character flaw. In this episode, I break down: • Why anxious rumination feels so real and so urgent • How patriarchy...

Feeling like the supporting character in your own story? This episode is your plot twist. We unpack Main Character Energy (MCE) as a buildable skill set —not a personality type—and show how tending to your needs heals burnout and expands your capacity to show up for the people and causes you care about. In this episode, you'll learn: The 3-part MCE framework: Permission → Self-Trust → Massive, Mes...

If you've ever found yourself doing everything right and still feeling exhausted, this conversation is for you. In this episode, Lily sits down with  Maureen , a writer, educator, and book coach who transformed her life from chronic burnout and perfectionism to joyful, sustainable main character energy. They dive into: ✨ How perfectionism becomes emotional armor (and how to take it off safely)....

Ever catch yourself thinking: "Am I doing enough to find love?" That question sounds productive—but it's usually fear in disguise. Fear that time's running out. Fear that what you want might never happen. In this week's episode of The Late Bloomer Show, I walk you through the 10-step "Am I Doing Enough?" checklist—the one I give my clients when they start to spiral. You'll learn how to: 💗 Practic...

Should you wait for the slow burn? Or chase the spark? This question keeps so many late bloomers stuck in overthinking, second-guessing, and dating people who aren't right for them. In this episode of The Late Bloomer Show, Lily breaks down the real truth about attraction and connection, including: The pros + cons of both the spark and the slow burn Why both approaches can lead to wasted time What...

Dating while struggling with body image fears can feel like an impossible task. In this episode, Lily is joined by Bri Campos, LPC, and body image coach, to explore the idea of body grief—the distress and loss we feel when our bodies change—and how it impacts dating. Together they cover: → The 4 aspects of body image you need to know → Why rushing to "body love" skips over the real healing work →...

In this powerful live coaching session, Lily sits down with Veronica for a live coaching session—a listener and Main Character Dating client—to explore what it really looks like to start dating again after a painful breakup…while also navigating chronic pain, a disability, and a world that often is deeply ableist. They explore: ✨ How to know if you're really ready to date again after a breakup ✨...

What do late bloomers most want to know about sex? In this episode, Lily sits down with Dr. Juliana Hauser—sex therapist, TEDx speaker, and author of A New Position on Sex —to answer the top 10 questions late bloomers have about sexuality, intimacy, and pleasure. They cover everything from starting with little or no experience, to disclosing your sexual history (or lack thereof), to navigating bod...

If you've ever felt behind in love or life, this episode is for you. On pub day for her new book, End Emotional Outsourcing: A Guide to Overcoming Codependent, Perfectionist and People Pleasing Habits, Beatriz Victoria Albina joins me to talk about how to stop centering everyone else's needs at the expense of your own—and start dating with self-worth. We unpack: 💎 What "emotional outsourcing" is...