The Ex-Good Girl Podcast

In the self-help space, it’s easy to assume someone else has it all together. The truth is, nobody does. While I have some answers—and I certainly can provide help to stop people-pleasing—I’m still learning, too. Today, I’m sharing recent changes and insights from my own life to offer an honest look at the messy, yet beautiful, journey of healing—and to remind you that joy, grief, and desire can a...

I hear people use the word “stuck” all the time to describe problems or situations, but what does it really mean? You might feel stuck in a relationship you want to change but don’t know how, or caught in a pattern you keep repeating even when it no longer feels good. I’ve been reflecting on what it really means to be stuck—not just to understand it better, but to find language and tools that actu...

Living with ADHD means it doesn’t disappear once you find success–you can be kind, loving, respectful and still show up with your ADHD when you connect with yourself and take accountability. Today, I’m bringing you a conversation from the I Have ADHD podcast, where I was interviewed by Kristen Carder. We talk about my journey of being diagnosed with ADHD in midlife, the relationship between neurod...

As women, we receive so much messaging about how big our lives are allowed to be. Whether it’s patriarchy, childhood conditioning, or the communities we’re part of, many women learn that being convenient, optimistic, and helpful makes them lovable. Even though it isn’t true, that influence often keeps us from living our lives in a bigger way. In this episode, we explore the signs that your life is...

Last week, I shared an interactive episode about people-pleasing and lying—today, we’re continuing the conversation. In this episode, I offer an approach that is based not on the morality of telling the truth, but on your values and human need for safety. We’ll take a deeper look at why we lie, the hidden costs it can have in our relationships, and how you can be more truthful in safe, selective p...

Lying is such an interesting topic—and after working with many women who feel stuck in patterns of people-pleasing, I’ve learned that lying and truth-telling are far more complex than they may seem. I’m not talking about lies meant to cause harm, but the everyday ones we tell to keep ourselves safe and comfortable: saying we’re fine when we’re not, or yes when we mean no. In this interactive episo...

Patriarchy is a system that has shaped our world for thousands of years, which can make unpacking the topic feel overwhelming. Today, I offer a basic overview of patriarchy with specific examples that show how we got here and how it continues to influence us today. Awareness is the key to greater power and greater choice in your life. I hope that this episode provides you with insights and practic...

Parenting and relationships can take on a unique dynamic when neurodivergence is part of your life—whether it's your own diagnosis or that of your partner or kids. Today, you’ll hear my conversation with Jenny Hobbs, a physician and a life coach who works with women navigating ADHD and autism in themselves or their families. We explore what ADHD looks like for women, why it often goes undiagnosed...

Today, I’m back with part two of my conversation with Enneagram coach Wendy Montgomery. In part one, we explored the nine Enneagram types and how people-pleasing can show up for each one. Now, we’re diving into what healing these habits looks like for each type and how the Enneagram can act as a guide for transformation. Here’s what we cover:  Why self-awareness is key to reducing people-plea...

I have been so excited to have my dear friend and Enneagram coach, Wendy Montgomery, on the podcast. The Enneagram is an expansive and incredible tool that has helped me understand myself and those around me in a whole new way. In this two-part conversation, you’ll learn about all nine types and the insight they offer into why and how we people-please. Here’s what we cover: The characteristics, co...

Send us a text So many women are not experiencing the sex, orgasms, and intimacy they genuinely want. Often, they blame themselves for this or settle for the belief that “this is just as good as it gets.” But it doesn’t have to be that way. I’m so excited to welcome back master certified coach, podcast host, and sexual pleasure and intimacy expert Danielle Savory. In this episode, we dive into the...

Send us a text Many women who struggle with people-pleasing often blame themselves, but these habits are usually rooted in deeper issues that are beyond our control. There can be various underlying causes, but in this episode, I share how my personal experiences with bullying have influenced my people-pleasing tendencies. If recalling your own experiences of being bullied brings up strong emotions...

Send us a text You may remember my conversation with therapist Andrea Parks about the drama triangle and how we can shift out of harmful roles in our relationships. But once we escape the drama, how do we build the deep, connected relationships we crave? In this episode, Andrea introduces the intimacy triangle and we dive into how authenticity, openness, and responsiveness create true closeness. H...

Send us a text One of the biggest challenges for people pleasers is the fear of disappointing, inconveniencing, or hurting others. As women, we have often been programmed to avoid these situations in order to maintain happy and peaceful relationships since childhood. But how can we truly find happiness and peace when we constantly betray our own wants and needs to avoid conflict and keep others sa...

Send us a text You may have heard Dr. Crystal Hall's name on the podcast a few weeks back when I responded to the video about why women are leaving the church. Crystal comes to the church from a feminist perspective–she's doing the deep work of unpacking how patriarchy has shaped religious spaces. As a coach for women in ministry, she helps others identify and unlearn the subconscious beliefs reli...

Send us a text So many women blame themselves for their people-pleasing tendencies– I can’t speak up, I apologize too much, I have to avoid conflict at all costs . If you’ve ever had thoughts like these, the first thing I want you to know is that it’s not your fault, and there is nothing wrong with you . We’ve lived our entire lives in a patriarchal system that shapes how we think about ourselves...

Send us a text It’s so common to tie our worth to our weight—this message has been ingrained in us from a young age. But the truth is, no number on the scale can give you the value and worth you're searching for. I’m so excited for you to hear my conversation with Laura Conley, a coach who helps moms lose weight for the last time. We talk about how our health isn’t tied to diet culture or calorie-...

Send us a text So much of our good-girl programming is rooted in religious teachings. Many of these rules keep us trapped in people-pleasing, but it’s possible to break free and develop a healthy spirituality– one that empowers you to live life the way you want. Today, I’m joined by Atheist Spiritual Director and author of No Nonsense Spirituality , Britt Hartley, to explore this transformation. H...

Send us a text It can be so hard for women to find reliable information about their bodies and what they truly need to be healthy. In this episode, I talk to award-winning journalist and author of The Vagina Business , Marina Gerner. Her book explores FemTech—innovations designed to genuinely support women’s health rather than mislead or market to them with misinformation. Together, we dive into t...

Send us a text Connection is a fundamental human need, yet many feel disempowered when it comes to making friends or deepening existing relationships. Today, I’m joined by connection coach Jewel Hohman to discuss the importance of strong friendships and how people-pleasing tendencies affect our ability to form meaningful bonds. Here’s what we cover: How societal programming around friendship contr...

Send us a text Embodying real wealth means being true to yourself with every decision–whether in your career, family life, or finances. Today, I’m joined by financial planner and author Julie Murphy to discuss how aligning with your authentic self can transform your financial reality. So many of us are not living the life we want because we feel stuck in our financial situation. Julie offers a fre...

Send us a text When it comes to relationships, we are designed to seek safety, belonging, and connection–we all want to know that we matter. For people pleasers and perfectionists, this commonly shows up as using certain behaviors to “earn” love in return, but that often doesn’t help cultivate real connection. In this episode, I offer you ten strategies you can use to improve any relationship no m...

Send us a text In her book, You Are Not Broken , Dr. Kelly Casperson points out the societal myth that sex is just “extra”--something to enjoy while it lasts and accept when it’s gone. I'm excited to welcome Dr. Casperson to the podcast today to discuss the impact of cultural stigmas about women's health and sexuality, and expand on last week’s episode about practical ways women can advocate for t...

Send us a text If you follow me on social media or regularly listen to this podcast, you might know that I have taken on the role of a volunteer perimenopause missionary. This stage of life has had a significant impact on me, as well as my sisters and friends—just as it does for all women at a certain point. In this episode, I investigate how the lack of information and support for women going thr...

Send us a text I started this podcast to contribute to the conversation around people-pleasing and perfectionism. Now, as The Ex-Good Girl Podcast reaches the 100th episode, I am extremely proud and grateful. My goal has always been to share tools, strategies, and stories to help you overcome challenges that result from good girl programming and live the life you want. It has meant so much to hear...