The Drink Tank

Do you want to listen to two idiots talk about a subject they know nothing about? Well you are in luck cause while that is what we do every episode but this time we REALLY lean in. With all the headlines in sports recently how could we not spend the entire episode pretending that we know sports... and I mean ALL sports. So lace up your shoes and take a swing at listening to us... Send us Fan Mail...

Well 200+ hours in and we are probably going to repeat some shit. So lets call this the clip show or the flashback episode or whatever they call that garbage episode that is just a series of old scenes over the years. Everyone hates that episode... so... adjust your expectations accordingly. We take on the garbage language we speak and some other shut about getting old and changing tastes... it is...

Invading your ears with hypersonic opinions on todays hot topics. We are russian to make you laugh. Putin the funny in funny bones. We are hardly experts in international politics but after listening I think you will agree that we are masters of military strategy. So join us on our journey to solve more of the worlds problem with alcohol and ignorance. Lets be honest if anything can convince the R...

It was a warm summer day in the middle of winter. We decided to talking to a microphone and hell spit forth. Pandora's box was opened then closed then opened then closed then open then closed then opened again. Less things were said when Rome fell. Transvestites. And forthcoming deuces spit the realist of y'all yee testament. With truth Motherfucker! Next one we are doing a biblical thin...

We have walked like an Egyptian we have talked like and Egyptian but until now we have never cunnilled like and Egyptian. We are breaking down walls and blazing trails in this all new and improved episode of this affront to humanity that we call a podcast. Either way trust me when I say you will learn things you didn't know you never wanted to know. We will teach you things that will haunt yo...

Ok so clearly if you have been paying attention there is a vague relation between title and content. So we talk about crypto currency and crack pipes. That should be all you need. I am not sure if that is what woes people into listening. It clearly can't be. You either listen or don't. Nobody reads the title and says... "that one is not for me"... you listen till we get boring....

Sometime in life all you need is a good old fashion dick sucking but rarely is it a president that needs to give it to you. Today it is both. Loosen up you jaw and argue the merits of your favorite and least favorite president to suck you dick. We are changing lives here. Also I have a midlife crisis.... but presidential dick sucking is clearly the highlight. Send us Fan Mail Support the show

Aight well we had a couple of weeks of technical issues. And scheduling. And whatever else is a good excuse for not posting or recording. Realistically at the end of the day we are drunk garbage human beings and when we have time to do this shit we do it if we don't we don't. You are lucky to have us here to make you feel better by comparison so maybe get off our dick on regularly schedu...

We drunk. We talk. You get the gist by now right? Send us Fan Mail Support the show

Well I may have overblown the whole argument from last episode. I guess WE DID stage it. Either way we are back together and its a whole new year. We take a running start at being the worst thing in 2022 by talking about the worst thing in human history, CHILDREN! But don't worry we also have OPINONS!!! yay! New year same show. I wouldn't have it any other way. Send us Fan Mail Support t...

It has been 3 days... I have heard nothing. I have to assume nefarious things have happened. THIS is what happens when people cant find common ground. Good job America YOU BROKE IT. We had a good thing going. But all great things come to and end.... and so close to 100.... Hopefully there is a means to get back to where we need to in 2022. Only time will tell... Send us Fan Mail Support the show

The world is frozen and yet we are on FUCKING FIRE. Alcohol fuel the conversation for better or for worse. Mostly for worse. We may have not acknowledged the white blanket on the city but we harnessed the empty feeling we all get from the inability to do the thing we wanted with people. Snow is the environmental COVID. So sit down in front of your fire or bundle up with a blanket and listen to the...

Well it is widely know that we are terrible people but just how terrible is an important question. This episode may answer this aching question. Are we sociopaths? Psychopaths? Is there a difference? Should you trust what we think the difference is? These are all questions. And these are all statements: This is a podcast. We talk about things. The subject manner falls victim to our alcohol consump...

We had a few weeks down time after a shitty audio file that I am still looking into... And maybe this one is shitty too. Lets be honest. I am good at drinking and talking shit but bad at audio engineering. So if you are ready for a vicious comeback with a whole lot of offensive content then this is your episode. If not... well... tune in anyway cause you aint got anything better going on..  Send u...

With thanksgiving over and the 100 year flood raging on we reflect on our lives and realize that maybe we suck at it. Now nobody is perfect and you can't expect anyone to live a perfect life but holy crap we are bad at even the smallest things. So listen to us make you seem like a better person than us. I mean you are better than us but maybe for more surprising reasons than you suspect. Ok t...

At the end of the day we can only count on a few things. One is that we will get drunk and talk nonsense. One thing we CANT count on is that we are real people and not AI that have studies the worst of human kind and this is just a grand experiment. Ill bet on that though. Cause there is no way we are real human people and we have this shitty of an attitude or personality. But you never really kno...

This could not be more of a stream of consciousness. We are drunk and stupid. We have good ideas... maybe, and bad ideas definitely. We flood the air waves with our reactions and observations of the great Washington Flood of 2021 and realize that people are dumb and blow shit way out of proportion. We are made of steel and nothing can touch us. Still not sure if this is a good or a bad thing. basi...

Ok this is 100% my fault. I was supposed to post days ago and I failed. Lets be honest. Not the first time and not the last time. Sorry. We did some things. Then dove deep into some other things... basically it was fun. but not too fun. but not boring either. So. Like. maybe what you want? I dont know it has been a while.  Send us Fan Mail Support the show

The ban is off and the drinks are flowing. It took a bit to finally get there but my first drink in over a month and my general takes on how being sober changed my life. So many things happened in the past couple of weeks and it all comes to a head in this episode. We solve life problems and complain about the things we don't have control over. There is still so much to talk about so we leave...

In the final installment of sober October we forget to update how being sober is going but we both stayed sober. So... win lose. Clearly being sober is not working for us. We are just as forgetful and personally WAY more Lazy. Other than that it is more of the same nonsense. Our lawyer says we have to apologize for any and all things that we said that may or may not have offended someone. And for...

Holy crap can I talk. Well it helps that parker is equally as good at interrupting but this episode is mostly me trying to get a bad story out. It is long winded and clearly has no point. So sorry about that. The end result is that health care is garbage. There I just saved you two hours. If you are a torturer or police warden then put this shit on loop and I just did your job for you. I accept so...

I am much less creative when I am sober. This may lead to a worse podcast or a better one. I don't know but it most definitely will lead to a worse episode description. So... while we may have solved the issue with shoplifting and opened the door to a new world of clothing purchasing we also scoff at the direction that styles are going. Either way not much different this week other than parke...

SoberOctober is the invention of dumb people with no self control who need an excuse to be interesting. That being said... I am participating. SO! we will be checking in all month with the progress of that bullshit. Outside of that everything else is boring. We try to innovate communication and prove how dumb we really are. At least we are not conspiracy nuts but we are certainly flirting with it....

Some people make poor decisions. Ok I lied. ALL people make poor decisions. Our poor decisions are far more hilarious and playful than everyone else's so that makes them more important. I think. Ok yeah I am pretty sure. But that is kind of our wheel house. Not knowing but pretending and just BEING more important. So tune in. Cause we help you pass the time. Which is all anyone is really look...

We slow down our high paced lives to dive into some more philosophical ideas. It wasn't on purpose but sometimes there just isn't a lot going on and you have to fall back on the basics. So our basics is life in general. What is going on and how do you view it. It is the fundamental things that truly define us. So this may be the most defining episode of all. I hope not though cause I lik...