The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle

It takes strength to end a breadcrumb relationship – that’s when you’re with someone who gives you JUST enough communication and affection to keep you hooked into them – and nothing more. Ending that kind of relationship is a no brainer when you’re working to transform your life. But what about when you’re in a crisis? In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who is trying to decide if sh...

There’s a CORE symptom of trauma that most people don’t know about. It’s very strong and can limit your whole life. It’s not only associated with trauma. But it’s almost universal in people who were traumatized as children, and it drives virtually every other trauma symptom. Until you’ve learned to identify and heal it, it’s hard to change the other symptoms. In this video I teach the basics of ne...

Many people with Childhood PTSD have tried countless treatments for trauma and still haven't found what worked. Could therapy be right for you? That may depend on WHO you choose to help you -- the wrong therapist could send you off course. But how do you know what to look for? And is talk therapy always the right choice for people who were abused and neglected? My Online Course "Healing Childhood...

Some people are insecure and anxious in relationships - this is a style of attachment where you constantly seek validation and love because you can’t stop fearing the person will leave. Some people have a more avoidant attachment style: They don’t like commitment, they can seem cold, and they can be quick to leave relationships as soon as it gets uncomfortable. But the hardest attachment style of...

It's easy, when you grew up with trauma, to go unconscious in relationships. Even though you feel like things are fine and you tell everyone things are fine – a big part of you has left the building. There are a number of reasons this happens – but it’s usually a mix of abuse or neglect from the past – where you taught yourself to DENY that you’re unsafe – and a fear of facing reality in PRESENT t...

If you grew up emotionally neglected, your parents may not have helped you develop a strong sense of self. If they didn't "get" who you were, and they didn't offer validation, you may find yourself confused about the sense of disconnection you feel around other people. Is it a trauma symptom? Are you around the "wrong" people? In this video I respond to a letter from a woman who finds herself feel...

People who grew up poor want the same good things in life as anyone else, but if you grew up with parents who were dysfunctional or neglectful, you may not have been shown how a person can use their talents to earn a decent living. Left to figure out everything by yourself, you may have ended up with poverty thinking, hoping a lottery ticket or lawsuit would finally take away the financial strain...

Isolating is an almost universal symptom of PTSD from childhood – or for anyone with wounds from trauma. There’s what it looks like from the outside. But the real reason you silate may not be becuase you want to be alone; chances are, you long for love and connection, and to belong in a community of friends. Find out in this video the REAL reason why traumatized people tend to hold themselves apar...

When you first start healing CPTSD, simply feeling a little better seems like the most you could ever hope for. You DO need to feel better, but you were meant for SO much more. In this four-video compilation I share some of my best content about discovering your gifts and stepping up into your true purpose in life. Heal Trauma in Just One Year?: FREE Pdf Download: https://bit.ly/3JrPdvx Take my FR...

One of the worst wounds a parent can inflict on a child is to not recognize them as distinct person -- not caring about their unique needs and their strengths, and not helping them to recognize these in themselves. If you were neglected in this way, one way it can show up is as "romantic clutter" -- a tendency to form partial relationships with people you half-love, who only partially love you. In...

If you were neglected as a child, you may still be acting on a belief that if you could only be nice enough, your parents would have transformed into the loving, caring adults you needed. This coping mechanism helps many kids who had trauma to survive, but now that you're an adult, you may still be suppressing your real self in hopes you can make the people you date love you and stay with you. Has...

We are living through upside-down times. People who used to be friends attack each other over opinions they can barely express. Where we once had unity, we face division. It’s hard to know what you can trust, or whom to believe. In times like this, we are called to be the BEST people we can be -- but how? A powerful exercise you can do is to consider what you are avoiding. In this video I name com...

When we talk about childhood trauma, so much of the focus goes onto the past -- what happened, and who did it. This is important, but healing can't really take place until you learn to focus on -- and CALM -- present day symptoms and solve the life problems that are so common for people with CPTSD. In this "best of the Fairy" compilation, I share four of my most popular videos detailing strategies...

Something beautiful about people is that we are designed to delight in others – to connect and bond with them, and sometimes, to fall in love and give our whole heart. CPTSD can distort that natural process of finding someone to love, and mislead you into attaching to people who cannot love you back. If you have trauma-driven boundary problems, they are happy enough to take advantage and leave whe...

Learning to love a partner is a huge and happy accomplishment for those of us who lived through abuse and neglect in childhood. Trauma wounds don't end in childhood; early abuse and neglect can leave us with trauma-driven behaviors that re-traumatize us and prevent healing. It can take time to release old patterns and change your life. In this video I respond to a woman with a harsh past who now s...

If you had childhood trauma and you’re still relying on conventional approaches to heal, you may still be suffering with symptoms and losing hope that healing can happen. Talking about your traumatic experiences may NOT be the best way to heal from what happened to you in childhood. In fact it can activate neural circuits related to the *stress response* – that make it harder to think, harder to f...

Some people can't focus on anyone but themselves. But others can't focus on themselves and instead become entirely focused on another person's problems -- their feelings, their shortcomings, and how unhappy they make you. This is codependency -- when you lose perspective on your own life and your own needs, and "implant" your will into someone else. Codependents are hooked on the belief that if th...

A true friend is someone who cares about you, and is interested in you, and supports what is best for you. They don’t get to tell you what to do, they don’t get to mercilessly criticize you, and they don’t get to use you as an emotional dumping ground and demand that you keep listening. If you have CPTSD, you may find you’re often on the receiving end of that, and you think you’re obliged to be su...

If you grew up without the attention and love of good parents, you may find yourself with symptoms of Complex-PTSD. One of the worst symptoms is an attraction to people who can’t give you attention or love. You see the red flags, but you become attached anyway. Until you've healed that attachment wound, you may find yourself getting your heart broken again and again. In this video I respond to a l...

If you’re living with trauma-related symptoms from abuse and neglect in childhood, you’ve had to work extra hard for things in life that come more easily to other people. Complex PTSD (CPTSD) is a type of PTSD that comes from chronic, intense stress, usually (but not always) in childhood. You might already know you have it, and you might be working hard to heal it. But if you’re like many people w...

For people who grew up with abuse and neglect – it’s a HUGE DAY when you finally break free of that family of origin. You actually have a barrier up against their ability to keep hurting you. You're safe, and only way they can get into your life again is when you CHOOSE to connect with them. But there’s this one huge complication, and it’s when there are other family members – especially minor chi...

When you weren’t loved properly as a child, it’s very, very common to become romantically involved in “complicated” relationships – where YOU’RE longing for something monogamous and committed and THEY’RE just jerking you around. With parents who were self-centered or who put you down, it’s no wonder you developed the ability to see great potential in people who are basically broken. The brutal tru...

Bad things happen in everyone's life. For some of us, a history of abuse and neglect in childhood produces common, trauma-driven symptoms that hold us back. Even if you've endured trauma and tragedy, it's possible to heal the past, calm the symptoms and build the happy, functional, love-filled life you deserve. In this "best of" compilation, I teach about practical steps you can take to start solv...

If you grew up neglected or abandoned, it's very likely you developed an attachment wound, and this can drive you into relationships with people who aren’t available, aren’t good to you, and aren't necessarily someone you even LIKE! One way that people with Childhood PTSD are affected by this is through long-distance relationships that don't fulfill their need for companionship and love. My letter...

Being STUCK means you know you’re in a bad place, but you don’t have the power to do anything about it. Most people get stuck sometimes, but those who were abused or neglected in childhood have extra susceptibility to staying in bad jobs and harmful relationships. It may be driven by financial insecurity, health problems, shame, fear of being alone, low self-esteem, or the freeze response. In this...