The Crappy Childhood Fairy Podcast with Anna Runkle

Limerence is the name for an obsessive infatuation that becomes more like an addiction to someone who cannot or will not be with you. It's especially common in people who were emotionally neglected as children, who will often go to any lengths to avoid losing HOPE that their love may someday be returned. They will pretend to be a friend, and lie about their true feelings, knowing on some&nbsp...

No matter how much you pull yourself together after a childhood full of abuse and neglect, the injury of trauma will TRY to suck you back into horrible dynamics of your childhood without you even realizing it. Your trauma-driven thinking will like to you that a clearly bad situation will be different "next time." In this video, I respond to a letter from a woman who is thinking about reconciling w...

There are two terrible ways that self-centered parents can wound you in the way you have relationships – and in particular, when they didn’t take an interest or support the unique little person that you were, and they didn’t help you learn to detect and say NO to mistreatment. And if this happened to you, you may find yourself struggling to have friends, and when you do get a friend, you’ll tolera...

If you've tried to get help for problems related to Childhood PTSD, you've probably tried many approaches to healing, and chances are, none of them really worked. In this video I teach about common approaches to healing childhood trauma, and the big reason why only some of them are effective. Try the FREE Daily Practice Course: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3Y4263I Take my FREE Course or Quizz...

Growing up poor, abused or neglected can leave you struggling in adulthood to develop a good career and earn what you are worth. In this 4-video compilation I share four of my most popular videos about trauma, work and income, and how people with Childhood PTSD can heal and grow their career lives and achieve financial security. Do you have CPTSD? Take the QUIZ: FREE PDF Download: https://bit.ly/3...

The irony about a codependent person is that, while they’re focusing excessively on someone else, they’re actually absorbed in themselves. And one sign that someone is codependent toward you CAN BE that you feel VERY irritated and invaded by a loved one’s excessive focus on you. They hover, they get in your business; it feels impossible to have boundaries around them. They say it’s just because th...

Not all childhood trauma comes in the form of neglect or physical abuse. One of the most insidious forms of trauma is when parents brainwash children to override their own common sense – to ignore what their eyes and ears tell them, to live in fear, and to live under the constant threat of ostracization for breaking an impossible set of rules. In this video I respond to a woman who has mostly extr...

Fear is an inner obstacle that stands between you and all you hope to do, or have or become. I’m talking about “fear” in the broadest sense – an anxiety, or an inhibition inside that stops you from freely living and authentically: Instead, you doubt yourself. You feel mortified every time you say what you really think. You stay small. Yet there is so much nonsense out there about what fear is -- b...

Having a few good friends is a great blessing in life. But if you grew up with trauma, you may have had trouble finding and keeping friendships with people you love and respect. This is partly because of abuse and neglect can harm your sense of feeling connected -- and partly because people with CPTSD can't always see the red flags that uncaring "friends" are mistreating them. In this 4-video comp...

A big reason why people who were neglected as children struggle to form stable, lasting relationships is because of insecure attachment. You might RUSH in and get enmeshed with someone you just met – and then freak out when it becomes clear that just because you’re sleeping together, the commitment and predictability of a real relationship isn’t there – or isn’t there YET. If you’re not clear what...

Sometimes neglectful parents make it necessary for kids to figure out EVERYTHING on their own. How to get by, how to get their needs met, how to stay safe. If you grew up like this, I’m going to guess it’s been hard for you to recognize who, among the people you know, really has your best interest at heart. And this shows up in your life relationships where someone mistreats you, but you stay – ma...

One thing that can be really hard for traumatized people is the pressure they feel when they make  decisions. It's easy to make terrible mistakes when your trauma has control of your thinking. The decisions you make in your life will play a huge role in how your life turns out, who you’ll become, how happy you’ll be. But all this can be jeopardized because PTSD from childhood can drive you, u...

Some people treat shame as a problem. And sometimes the belief that you've done something wrong is imagined, and needs to be released. It's easier though, when you address what I call "earned shame" -- things you did or failed to do that cause you ongoing regret, that you'd like to change and make better. In this 4-video compilation I share some of my best videos on the topic of Shame, and how peo...

When you’re into someone but you hide how you really feel, because you know they’re not really available, and you pretend you’re just friends. Don’t be surprised when the reality of the situation smacks you down. People who were traumatized as kids are particularly vulnerable to this “just friends” behavior. And unhealthy people can detect that in us – the way we see what they just did and -- and...

For people didn’t dare express themselves or cry or have needs when they were kids – it’s a hard road growing up and learning to BE in a relationship for real. You were trained that your true feelings were unspeakable, so you keep quiet. Wanting more love or attention feels shameful and so you pretend you need nothing. The cost of this is that people with too little to give you get to be in your l...

There’s no common understanding of how adults are supposed to heal trauma from childhood – how that happens, where it comes from, what exactly you should do when you want to overcome all the problems that go with CPTSD. And so if YOU are trying to heal from abuse and neglect in childhood – and all the way that’s played out in your life and is still holding you back, it’s not surprising if you feel...

So much information about CPTSD focuses on the past and what other people have done. If you're feeling stuck, try focusing on changes YOU can make in your life today to reduce symptoms and feel calmer, more focused, and more in charge of your life. In this 4-video compilation, I share videos about changes you can make to move your trauma healing forward faster. Heal Trauma in Just One Year?: FREE...

When someone is romantically obsessed with you, they usually will try to hide it. But make no mistake, you can feel it and if you’re not into them, it does not feel good. Limerence is the word for when a person infatuated so badly with someone who isn’t interested in them, that it becomes like an addiction – very destructive for the limerent person’s life. But it’s also harmful to the person who i...

A history of trauma can leave you defenseless against terrible mistakes. When you feel confused and you find yourself hiding the truth of your life from the people who care about you, you may be in a dangerous state of denial. Denial is a destructive force, and when you’re in it, you can’t see it. Everything depends on reaching out for help. In this video I respond to a letter from a woman who is...

Nobody likes people who are controlling. Sometimes we all have to put up with controlling people because we have no one else to support us, or we need money, or, most often, because trauma trained us to tolerate control. But when you grew up with trauma, there can also be a tendency to BE controlling – maybe because you grew feeling things were so out of control it’s now like a reflex to hold peop...

Trauma in childhood is caused by more than "abuse." Being neglected -- by parents or by your peers and community - can be just as damaging to well-being. In this 4-video compilation I share some of my most popular videos about neglect and the types of triggers that often result, potentially causing you to feel separate, anxious and isolated throughout your life. Healing is possible! In this video...

LIMERENCE HAS BEEN DESCRIBED AS "an involuntary potentially inspiring state of adoration and attachment to a limerent object (LO) involving intrusive and obsessive thoughts, feelings and behaviors -- from euphoria to despair, contingent on perceived emotional reciprocation". While not inherently sexual, limerence is almost always romantic in nature. However, it’s very possible to have adoration to...

If you’ve ever tried to get help for struggles in your life related to childhood trauma – you may have been told, pressured even, to spend time and money talking about the past – even if you’ve talked about the past or years -- even when you don’t feel that’s the problem right now. and even if you’re desperate to work on present problems, so you can be happier. There's a time to talk about what ha...

Be careful what you *believe* about Complex PTSD, because a lot of information out there is outdated and outright WRONG. When you read or seek professional help, I urge you to be very THOUGHTFUL about what information you let in. It's so important that you know the truth about what causes it, what it feels like, and what you can do to heal (it's better news than you might think!). In this video I...

Some signs of trauma in your childhood are well known and easy to recognize in yourself. But some may be new to you. You may have gone through live feeling shame about your social awkwardness, or your behavior around romance, or your difficulties keeping focused on your own life and not getting sucked into the others' problems. In this 4-video compilation, I share some of my most popular videos on...