Spilt: A Podcast with Charlene and Tonya

This season, we explored what it means to grow through life instead of avoiding it. From processing emotions and overthinking to self-worth, core lies, intuition, healing patterns, emotional weight, and honoring our energy—we spent this season learning how awareness changes the way we move through the world. In this finale episode, we reflect on the biggest lessons from Season 6 and what growth ha...

What happens after you recognize your patterns, your “mountain,” or the core beliefs you’ve been carrying? In this episode, we explore what real growth actually looks like after the moment of awareness. We talk about why change is often slower than we expect, what it means to live in the “in-between” space, and how growth shows up in small, everyday choices rather than dramatic transformation. Par...

What’s the belief about yourself that feels like a fact—but might not be? In this episode, we explore the idea of a “core lie”—a deeply held belief that shapes how we see ourselves and move through the world. We talk about how these beliefs form, how they show up in everyday life, and why they can be so difficult to challenge. With honest reflection, we share the core lies we’ve carried and how th...

How often do we stop and ask ourselves how much energy we actually have? In this episode, we talk about recognizing our energy levels—emotionally, mentally, and physically—and why learning to pay attention to our capacity matters. We explore the signs of low energy, why we tend to push through anyway, and what it looks like to adjust instead of forcing ourselves to keep going. Part of our Season 6...

How much are you carrying right now? In this episode, we explore the emotional and mental weight we hold—responsibilities that aren’t ours, past experiences we haven’t released, and the pressure to carry things we can’t control. We talk about why we take on so much, how it affects our mental health, and what it looks like to begin putting some of that weight down. Part of our Season 6 theme, Growi...

How often do we stop and ask ourselves how much energy we actually have? In this episode, we talk about recognizing our energy levels—emotionally, mentally, and physically—and why learning to pay attention to our capacity matters. We explore the signs of low energy, why we tend to push through anyway, and what it looks like to adjust instead of forcing ourselves to keep going. Part of our Season 6...

In this episode, we explore the idea behind the book The Mountain Is You, and the uncomfortable truth that sometimes the biggest obstacle on our healing journey is ourselves. We talk about how self-sabotage often begins as self-protection, why our nervous systems resist change even when we want it, and how old coping mechanisms can quietly keep us stuck in familiar patterns. This conversation isn’...

Unlearning is only half the work. The other half is building something steadier in its place. In this episode, we talk about what it looks like to create new patterns without pressure or perfection. We explore how the nervous system learns safety through repetition, why small changes matter more than dramatic ones, and how micro-choices build self-trust over time. Growth doesn’t require a personal...

Some of the habits we struggle with today once helped us survive. In this episode, we talk about the coping mechanisms we developed to navigate difficult seasons—people-pleasing, over-functioning, avoidance, emotional shutdown—and why those patterns deserve compassion instead of shame. We explore how these strategies formed, how they protected us, and what happens when they no longer serve us in t...

In a world where so much of our time is spent consuming content, hobbies invite us to slow down and create something with our hands and minds. In this episode, we explore why hobbies are more than just a way to pass the time—they can be powerful tools for mental health, emotional balance, and personal joy. We talk about the difference between creating and consuming, the surprising resurgence of “a...

When was the last time you paused long enough to acknowledge yourself? In this episode, we explore a simple but uncomfortable question: Are you proud of yourself? Many of us move through life focusing on what we haven’t done yet, what still needs fixing, or where we’ve fallen short. Rarely do we stop to recognize the quiet strength it takes to keep showing up, healing, and growing. We talk about w...

Self-worth is often confused with confidence, productivity, or achievement — but it runs much deeper than that. In this episode, we talk honestly about what self-worth really is, how it gets distorted through trauma, survival mode, and expectations, and why so many of us end up outsourcing our value to others. We explore the difference between self-worth and self-esteem, the subtle ways low self-w...

Not all risk is reckless. Some risks are how we heal. In this episode, we talk about the difference between impulsive, escape-driven decisions and the kind of risk-taking that restores self-trust. We explore why growth can feel threatening to the nervous system, how trauma shapes our relationship with change, and what it looks like to take small, grounded risks that move us closer to who we really...

We all have an inner dialogue — the ongoing conversation we live with every day. But have you ever stopped to notice what yours sounds like? In this episode, we explore how our inner dialogue is shaped by childhood, trauma, expectations, and survival. We talk about why the human brain naturally leans toward negative self-talk, how that voice can become harsh or protective, and how awareness change...

Dreaming isn’t always about ambition — sometimes it’s about permission. In this episode, we talk honestly about what it means to dream again after long seasons of survival, responsibility, or quiet desperation. We explore why some people never stop dreaming while others learn to silence their desires, and how dreams don’t disappear — they wait. This conversation isn’t about pressure, timelines, or...

Most people don’t fall apart — they keep functioning. In this episode, we talk about quiet desperation: what it looks like, why it happens, and how it often hides beneath competence, responsibility, and “being fine.” We explore how survival mode can silence desire, numb emotion, and disconnect us from ourselves — and why simply naming this experience can be a powerful first step toward growth. Thi...

Mindfulness is often misunderstood as calming the mind or clearing thoughts — but it’s really about awareness. In this episode, we explore mindfulness through the lens of asking the right questions, not judging ourselves or forcing peace. We talk about how the questions we ask can either fuel overthinking or invite clarity, how curiosity creates space for emotional regulation, and why mindfulness...

Overthinking can feel productive — like we’re preparing, protecting, or preventing something from going wrong. But often, it does the opposite. In this episode, we talk honestly about the negative outcomes of overthinking — how it fuels anxiety, keeps us stuck, drains our emotional energy, and disconnects us from the present moment. We explore why some of us replay, analyze, and spiral, while othe...

In this episode, we talk about what it actually means to process emotions — not stuff them down and not get lost in them either. We explore the different ways people experience and move through emotions, why some of us feel things quickly while others feel deeply over time, and how both responses can be rooted in protection rather than weakness. We discuss why emotions need acknowledgment, how unp...

The holidays can bring joy — and a lot of emotional weight. In this Season 6 opener, we reflect honestly on how the season impacted our mental health and what it revealed about where we are now. We talk about why Rooted & Real led us here, what it means to grow without rushing, and how we’re approaching goals with compassion instead of pressure. Welcome to Growing Through It. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠...

In this season wrap-up, Charlene and Tonya reflect on the growth they achieved by embracing a grounded and authentic approach to the podcast. Hopefully, listeners have noticed changes in themselves, too. We’re celebrating the whole journey—the messy moments, the breakthroughs, and the practices that will carry us into the new year. Tune in for a brand-new season in 2026, and here’s to health and w...

As Spilt’s “Rooted and Real” season comes to a close, Tonya and Charlene sit down to reflect on what it means to find peace where you are — not in perfection or constant striving, but in being rooted in the things that matter most. This episode explores how our values, faith, and self-awareness can keep us grounded through chaos, and how learning contentment doesn’t mean giving up — it means growi...

Life can move at a whirlwind pace. Between family, work, caregiving, and the constant mental load, it’s easy to slip into survival mode. This episode focuses on taking a moment to pause and check in with yourself — asking honest questions about your well-being before burnout, relapse, or depression sets in. Tonya and Charlene share tips on creating grounding rituals and recognizing subtle warning...

We live in a world that constantly feeds us — endless scrolling, binge-watching, and content overload. But are we doing anything with all that input? In this episode, we break down the difference between consuming and creating. One might lead to stagnation while the other helps build purpose, confidence, and growth. We aren’t anti-consumption because rest, inspiration, and learning matter. But it’...

Healing isn’t just self-care, bubble baths, and gentle routines. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable honesty — the kind that forces us to stop repeating the same patterns and start taking responsibility for our lives. In this episode of Spilt , Tonya and Charlene talk about the role of accountability in mental health and wellness. They explore how to hold yourself accountable without shame, self-hatred,...