Sex for Saints

Let me ask you a question. Are you overfunctioning or underfunctioning in your sexual relationship with your spouse? Taking a look at yourself and honestly answering this question can help you have a better relationship. We often get into patterns and dynamics that seem helpful but end up causing more problems in the end. So let's define what it is and what we can do about it.

This is part two of an amazing interview I did with fellow life coach Julie Balkman. This week we're talking more about our young adults and how they are really struggling in dating and moving into relationships and into sexual relationships. Whether you're a young adult, either single and dating or newly married or you have young adults, even if you have been married a long time, I think you're g...

This is part one of an amazing interview I did with fellow life coach Julie Balkman. I really wanted to do this interview with Julie because I think a lot of our young adults are really struggling in dating and moving into relationships and into sexual relationships. Whether you're a young adult, either single and dating or newly married or you have young adults, even if you have been married a lo...

Have you noticed that the passion in your sex life has disappeared? It's time to ignite it again, don't you think? I was recently on Ashlee Sorenson's podcast called A Bit Better Everyday and I loved our conversation so much that I asked Ashlee if I could share it with you and she graciously said yes. So, join us as we talk about how we ignite that passion again both in our lives and in the bedroo...

Our definition of sex can really affect how much sex we're getting. So, how do you define sex? Is sex just penetration and orgasm? Or are there other activities that you define as sex? This isn't a one-size-fits-all answer but it's important to ask yourself how you define it and why. Listen as we discuss what a broad definition of sex can do for your sex life.

Have you heard about sleep divorce? "Sleep divorce" is a situation where couples sleep separately on a regular basis to improve their sleep quality due to issues like snoring, different sleeping schedules, or personal preferences. Studies show that it can help save relationships, but it may also cause problems. Listen to this episode to find out what those problems may be and how to make it work i...

Have you ever been jealous in your relationship? Around 77% of people report feeling at least an occasional jealousy in their relationships. In this episode, we're talking about jealousy and how a little jealousy in a relationship can be a good thing, but too much jealousy can damage a relationship. Let's discuss why you're feeling jealous and what you can do about it.   Sources: Journal of Person...

Through my own experience and coaching women for five years, I have come to know what the sexual conditioning of women is in our Christian faith, and how to help them. But women aren't the only ones affected by our teachings. Men hear that they are the head of the household and women are there to nurture them, including giving them what they "need". Men hear that they are to push down their emotio...

How does your body image affect your partner? That's what my guest Amber Price and I are talking about in this episode. Even though body image issues is something you see a lot in women, men have body image issues too. Listen in as we discuss what we do, why we do it and what we can do about it.    You can find more information about Amber at: Her website   Instagram

In this episode, we talk about the top 4 reasons for low desire in women that I see in my clients. I break down why women have low desire and what to do about it. So if you want to want sex, but you just don't, this is the episode for you! I also have a lot of men coming to me to help their wives. Let's talk about that too.   Here are the episodes referenced in this episode: Taking Care of your hu...

In this episode, I'm talking to Sheri Brasier about how to gain more confidence in the bedroom. Sheri is a life and style coach which means that she empowers women to have great style and in turn gain confidence. In our discussion, we talked about how to improve how you look at yourself in order to improve how you feel about yourself and sex. This really is an interesting discussion on style and h...

In this episode, I'm speaking with Katie Runyan of Faithful Fling, a subscription role-playing website. We talk about how to easily add role-play into our marriages. This is such a fun episode! Katie talked about how she created her business because it's what she was looking for when they first started role-playing. Listen to this episode, and then sign up for a free fling.  Katie resides in Kansa...

Rather than dwelling on the questions your brain is offering to you, answer them. Thoughtfully think about them and answer them.  You have the answers already inside of you. I'm so excited to share this teaser from my subscription podcast with you. In this episode, I talk to Jen and Floyd about taking things to the next level. I've been working with them for a couple of years now and the change ha...

How do I get my wife to develop her sexual self? That is probably one of the most common questions I get from husbands. This question makes the assumption that if I just say the right thing in the right way their eyes will be opened and all will be right in my world. But that is not usually the case. And what it actually ends up doing is creating more unhealthy pressure. So, how do you create heal...

In this episode, I'm speaking with Dr. Cami Hurst about her research into consenting to unwanted sex. This research is ground breaking in understanding why so many middle aged women have no libido. I am so happy to be able to share both what she found in her research and also what to do about it. Cami Hurst, LAMFT, is a sex and relationship therapist in Meridian, ID. Cami operates a private practi...

My clients often have transactional relationships with their spouses without even realizing it. In this episode, I want to explain what a transactional marriage is, why we don't want it and what we want instead. I was recently reminded that people often think of our relationship with our Heavenly Father as transactional when all He wants is a relationship with us. As we pattern our lives after our...

What is empowerment? More importantly, how can we be sexually empowered? In this episode, we're going to not only answer these questions, but also how to know if we are sexually empowered or if we're just seeking outside validation. Sexual empowerment feels differently for everyone which is why it's something we evaluate for ourselves rather than have someone else tell us. Listen to find out how t...

In this episode, I'm speaking with Joey Mascio. He is a fellow life coach and good friend who normally works with teens helping them become the hero of their own story. But today we're taking it a step further. A lot of what we think about ourselves comes from when we were teenagers. So we too need to find a way to become the heroes of our stories! Whether you were a teenager once or are raising a...

I'm excited to share with you a teaser for my new subscription podcast, Embracing You. In this Embracing You episode, I talk to Emily about how shame is affecting her sex life. We discuss where this shame comes from and some ways to get over it. Sexual shame is something I see a lot in my clients, especially in our conservative Christian culture, even though we don't always see it as shame. Listen...

What is enthusiastic consent and why do we need to talk about it? That's what we're going to delve into in this episode. We have to enthusiastically consent to sex every single time. Just laying there and letting him do whatever he wants isn't enthusiastic consent. Listen in to see how to give enthusiastic consent and how much better it can make your sex life.

In this episode, I am talking to my friend and mentor, Aimée Gianni, about how to have a covenant marriage. So often we stay in our broken marriages because we made a covenant. But what if doing that is actually breaking your covenant?    Aimée offers some amazing things to think about if we are at the point where we are thinking about divorce. Even if we're happy in your marriage, her advice can...

In this episode, I'm talking with fellow coach and my real life best friend, Crystal Hansen, all about how conflict actually builds intimacy in your marriage. I know this sounds counter intuitive, but it really does work. We all want to feel connected and when we try to avoid conflict, that creates a wedge in our relationships. Crystal shares with us Gottman's Four Horsemen of conflict and the ant...

Often in marriage, if there is disconnect in one part of the relationship, there is also disconnect in the bedroom. That's how I came to know my guest today, Lisa. After getting married in the Temple, Lisa's husband had a faith crisis and left the Church. Lisa was angry at him for changing the future that she had envisioned for them. She and her husband found therapy and that really has helped her...

My most downloaded podcast episode is #134 - Masturbation and the Church. I published this episode over 2 years ago and it's still something I get asked about all of the time. It's a hot topic because of the negative messages we have received about masturbation. So, in this episode, we're going to look at how masturbation can increase your connection and intimacy in your marriage, if done in a hea...

I recently had a client tell me that she has forgotten how to flirt. She wanted to find a way to make her marriage feel like more of a partnership rather than a business relationship. So, here is Flirting 101. Maybe it's been awhile, maybe you have never been too good at flirting, but flirting is a great way to connect with your husband on a deeper level. Let me show you how!