Sex For Couples with Heather Shannon

After hearing from a few men “Nice guys finish last–maybe I should start being a dick and women will like me!” Heather decided it was time to set the record straight.  Join Heather and her guest Matt Artisan for this discussion on reframing the way we think about approaching other people, flirting and being confident. Matt is an award-winning dating coach who has appeared on Netflix, ABC News...

This episode was prompted by a recent audience question, but it’s an age-old debate in the sex therapy realm. Is it lame to schedule sex? If you don’t schedule it, do you wind up just being in a permanent sex rut?  Of course spontaneous sex can feel extra hot and intense . . . and no one wants sex to feel like another appointment on their calendar. We want novelty and adventure in our sex liv...

Heather’s guest this episode is Chris Trew. Chris is a comedian and improv coach living in New Orleans. He's been featured at over 75 comedy festivals in North America and seen on MTV, America's Got Talent, and GQ Magazine. He runs Comedy House New Orleans, Hell Yes Fest, and teaches improv comedy all over the world. Plus President Barack Obama follows him on Twitter, which Heather thinks is prett...

In celebration of Pride month, let's explore the concepts of queerness and questioning. In this episode, Heather questions the usefulness of labels and expertly navigates the topic of "Am I Queer?" Through personal anecdotes, Heather explores how sexuality can be fluid and how cultural biases can impact one's sexual identity. Whether identifying as queer, lesbian, bicurious or genderfluid, listene...

Join host Heather Shannon and guest Kesiena Boom in an engaging and enlightening conversation as they explore the captivating world of queerness, kink, and fearless communication. Unravel the meaning of "femme" within the queer community as they provide insights for queer women on confidently approaching and asking out their crushes. Discover the allure of play parties, gain wisdom on direct commu...

In this episode, Heather answers listener questions on kink differences, rimming, nipple play and sex with vaginal prolapse. She also addresses how our thoughts (not our partner and not our circumstances) create our turn-on and how our conditioning might make us feel like certain sexual activities are “good” or “bad,” when that is not actually the case. Plus, find out what “soft swapping” means an...

Register for Heather’s free “Get Your Sexy Spark Back” Workshop taking place on Tuesday, May 30th @ 7pm: https://askasextherapist.clickfunnels.com/optin1683846259317 "Don't let fear, guilt, or shame keep you from connecting with your original sexual essence and experiencing more pleasure." ~Tilly Storm TILLY’S BIO: This week's guest, Tilly Storm, is a certified sex and intimacy coach, using deep t...

How much do you really need to have your shit together to date? Should you work on yourself first or just go out there and date exactly as you are? Listen in for Heather’s advice on how to handle insecurities while putting yourself out there in the dating world. Heather discusses the importance of authenticity, consent, communication and boundaries when it comes to new sexual relationships. Discov...

Join Heather and hilarious guest Jordyn Hakes for a truly unfiltered chat about about owning your sexuality and how mental health is the sexiest thing of all. Jordyn is the host of the wildly successful podcast “The Horny Housewife,” which focuses on dating your spouse and locker room talk for couples.  In today’s episode, Jordyn shares her journey of becoming a podcaster and how the sudden l...

In this week's episode of Ask a Sex Therapist, Heather Shannon coaches a woman named Vanessa to help her evolve her emotions and sex life. Vanessa is learning to break free from her sex negativity and integrate the sexual and the emotional. But as she tries to do so, an inner voice of self-protection is preventing her from fully letting go. What is this mysterious inner voice trying to tell her, a...

In this exciting episode of Ask A Sex Therapist, your host Heather Shannon interviews Dr. Laurie Mintz, author of Becoming Cliterate and an award-winning college professor with over 20 years of experience working with sexual issues. Join them as they share their passion for closing the orgasm gap, encouraging pleasure for vulva owners, and challenging the myths perpetuated by society about female...

Erectile dysfunction is one of the most common issues I’ve dealt with as a sex therapist. Turns out there’s a lot of pressure on people with a penis! There’s the idea that they need to last super long and manage their erection. There’s the idea that they should always want sex and should really never say no to sex. And there’s the idea that they’re just sex machines who don’t have feelings or requ...

Join Heather as she speaks with Alexandra Harbushka, the founder of "Life with Herpes," a supportive community aimed at shattering the stigma surrounding herpes. Alexandra shares her personal story with herpes, how she got over the stigma and how she got SO FREE of shame and stigma that she turned it into a public-facing career helping others!  In this episode, you will learn: Why even marrie...

In this episode, you really get to Ask A Sex Therapist! Listeners asked Heather their most pressing sex questions including: How can I have anal sex without it hurting and actually enjoy it? I’m interested in sex with other women, but need some help with approaching women. Any advice? I’m experiencing guilt with masturbation–my partner has said she doesn’t like it when I masturbate. How do I get p...

This week's guest is Kimmy Seltzer. She is a confidence therapist, authentic dating strategist and image expert. With vast knowledge and experience as a therapist, certified style coach, dating coach and matchmaker, Kimmy has helped people find lasting love and connection, attract success, and build valuable relationships using her unique competence makeover process. Listen to the full episode to...

Healthy boundaries are all the rage . . . and with good reason. Having them helps us feel empowered, reduces resentment and encourages self-respect. But what about when it comes to sex? How can you practice saying no and communicating your needs without pushing the other person away? Do healthy sexual boundaries mean you’re never going to have casual sex (answer - no!)? How can sexual boundaries h...

Join Heather and her first ever guest, THE Black Burlesque Queen - Perle Noire, for a high vibe discussion on purpose, healing, sexiness, therapy, embodiment and intuition. Perle’s path to her current success and alignment is NOT a boring one and you’ll definitely want to listen in to learn from her Wild Wisdom and Passionate Purpose. The ladies discuss how to relate to your emotions in a healthy...

As most of us have realized by now, sex education is sorely lacking in the US and most of the rest of the world! What we learn from most religions is a sex negative message—that there are a lot of rules about who you can have sex with, when you can have sex with them and what kind of sex acts are ok. Schools typically try to scare us into abstinence with talks about STIs and unwanted pregnancy. An...

Do you really need to love yourself first before loving someone else? Self-love is one of the most talked about topics in the self-help movement and one of the most common things relationship coaches discuss on social media.  Many of us identify as having self-esteem problems and that is actually be holding us back more!  The problem is that constantly striving for self love, self esteem...

Monogamy? Non-monogamy? Which is the right or wrong choice?  Monogamy is still the default relationship style for relationships for most cultures in the world. But that doesn’t mean it’s the right one for you.  Let’s question the default and shed some light on options so you can choose the right path for yourself and your relationships. Because the truth is there isn’t a right or wrong!...

Consensual sex is important because it allows partners to start a sexual encounter from a foundation of trust and respect.  Everyone should have the final say in making decisions about their own bodies and sexual experiences. Not only does great communication about consent help to prevent sexual violence and abuse, it actually allows partners to relax and let go more knowing that they are saf...

Attachment styles indicate how we attach to others in relationships and how we feel about ourselves. They therefore impact all our relationships and nearly everything we do About half the population has a secure attachment style. The other half has an insecure attachment style. Insecure styles include anxious attachment, dismissive avoidant attachment and fearful avoidant attachment.  Attachm...

Sometimes, it’s your thought process that is making you resist the good things from happening in your life.  What you think, you create!  When we're thinking negative thoughts, we're going to feel negatively, as well. Our thoughts and beliefs can greatly influence our reality, and this can also apply to our experiences in sex, love, and dating.  This can include attracting a loving...

I’ve definitely been there, and I’m guessing you’ve been there as well, when you haven’t felt really sexy. And that’s okay, that’s what we’re talking about today, how to feel sexy and feel yourself again. We’re going to go over a few different ways you can remove the obstacles to feeling sexy and get in tune with your body, with your energy and thoughts. So let’s get our sexy back again!  Wha...

One of the most common questions I get from clients is, how do we spice things up in sex? Answering this question is a bit more complicated than you would think. So today we’re going to dive deeper into how to avoid falling into a rut when it comes to sex, and how you can keep stoking the fire and keep seeing each other as sexual beings, especially if you are in a long-term relationship. Tune in a...