Review Party Dot Com

There is a waterfowl on the water prowl. Don't meander with your gander or you could get an Anser you don't like. These are puns, people. Today's topics include Mandy Moore encased in amber, mist monsters, Saving Private Ryan, facts, gains, fish sticks, the very nature of intelligence, pervert licenses, sugar free gummie bears, and scratchy blankets. Want more party? Check it out at https://www.re...

There is like one dish that eggplant is the star of, and it’s eggplant parmesan. That is just like, diet lasagna. Lasagna lite. Nah dawg, nah, I ain’t having NONE OF IT. Today's topics include cymbal banging monkey laughter, tasty cartoon apples, the Mario 64 loading screen, name brand zip lock bags, bamboo, grapefruit juice, birthday cake protein, powerful beef jerky crushing jaws, bamboo again,...

If tin cans in tasteful bathing wear is wrong, I don't want to be right! Today's topics include: cannonballs, brussel sprouts, vitamins, unwanted aloe vera, wax helmets, the old people's realm, gack, Short Circuit, turkey legs, Tinder, a visceral series of stills, and a hot liter of cool cola. Want more party? Check it out at https://www.reviewpartydotcom.com/!

When were you at your cutest, your youngest, and your most availablest? The apex of those three variables hold the secret to your springboard into success with money, fame, and great relationships. To find out more, order my self help 8-track box set. Today's topics include the Pizza Hut call center and the Pizza Beast, a Kwik Trip to the grave, yelling "Rangers!", resting pickle face, and "snapch...

Once you pop the fun don't stop, especially if you are popping open a sleeve of cookies. The first cookie is as decadent as the dozenth. You can't stop. You must continue feasting. You must write a review for the cookies. And then eat twelve more. Today's topics include the perfect cough, serious little brother bodily harm, desperate demanding, another bowl of gruel, loading up the bucket, six mis...

What if the dial-up tone was the screams of cookies being deleted? Today's topics include troubled waters, bootstrap situations, stupid stuff, alternative lifestyle chiropractors, Dubious Doctor D, an uncomfortable analogy, and ancient dudes. Want more party? Check it out at https://www.reviewpartydotcom.com/

The multiverse movies brush over one thing: all the different slightly alternative pastas you could enjoy. YES! YES! YES! Today's topics include: grudge ghosts, doubling down, professional review enjoying, Arnold's ass, jitterbug phones and stretchy pants, bags of sand in boiling water, the quesadilla window, the full bowling shirt treatment, screaming cheeks, dorm room futons, The Oregon Trail, r...

“Every man's life ends the same way. It is only the details of how he lived and how he died that distinguish one man from another.” - Ernest Hemingway. “How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains? Yeah... If Coach would'a put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind.” - Uncle Rico Today’s topics include empty promises, doub...

The sauce is under the cheese, and The Force is underneath that. If you want to get to the midichlorians, you better bring a fork AND knife for this saucy space swamp surprise! Today’s topics include little unicycle monkeys, the undeniable birdshit factor, Wrigley gum, night sweats (on purpose), the taste of anger, greek yogurt, bananas and pizza slices, bulbous children, and Fountain Picture Part...

This year I’m animorphing into a bengal! I’m gunna scratch everyone up! Look out! Today’s topics include Thor’s weapons guy, scrap metal and barbed wire, Turkish barbers, X-ray juice, mushroom stink mix, Tenacious Deacons, Enya, LED room lights, DJ Actual Baby, fine dining, and sabrage. Want more party? Check it out at https://www.reviewpartydotcom.com/!

Every Reviewer down in Reviewville liked reviews a lot... But Evil Matt, who lived just south of Reviewville, did NOT! Evil Matt hated reviews! The whole review season! Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason. I think the most likely reason of all may have been that his Amazon gift card was two sizes too small. Today's topics include: X-files Christmas Shopping, Alien Jeff Bezo's...

It’s beginning to look a lot like a cold blooded reptile! Today’s topics include Bob Newhart, fishnet business, sassy girls, launching yourself to Hell, Mad Cats, ziplock bags of guac, Mario 64 noises, toddlers, and screams of vengeance. Want more party? Check it out at https://www.reviewpartydotcom.com/!

I googled the lyrics for Despacito so I could write some great jokes for this description, but I forgot they were all in Spanish :( Today topics include hatchets, jello, the unlimited applications of pog slammers, getting hit on vicariously, being discreet with your juices, turkey basters, John Cusack, and raw, solid water. Want more party? Check it out at https://www.reviewpartydotcom.com/!

It smells like a Karen's haircut and last minute gift wrappings, that's right, tis the season to just hate everyone, especially your own family, and yourself. Wow, that was really more depressing to write than I thought. Have this funny podcast episode to make up for it. Today's topics include possible feral basement children, a lack of botany, The Grinch, imagination, a whole bucket seat, growlin...

Put a little caterpillar in the oven, 12 minutes later you got a pepperoni butterfly ripe for the picking. Happy Thanksgiving? Today’s topics include 0 carb turkey jerky, mafia feet, ointment, a bandolier of turkey drumsticks, extra thin tomatoes, onion air, wizardly antics, gaslighting total strangers, The Master of Disguise, and the Mayflower Police. Want more party? Check out https://www.review...

What are moms up to in the great white north? This week the party ventures out to find out just that. Today’s topics include a topological goober, Calgary, getting names of NHL teams wrong, rad incarnate, walking around like Robocop, white gumballs, Mona Lisa for the Nintendo 3DS, Paris Syndrome, little dope fiends on monkey bars, the banana slicer, Harold and the Purple Crayon, and crocodile deat...

Pandas poop around 40 times a day, on average. Today's topics include stomping things, good bridges, "hotdoggin'", radiating positive energy, ball handling, Buffalo Wild Wings, robots, burger octagons, Brent's freshman year roommate, Dick Shooter valley, flubber, and pooh bear. Want more party? Check it out at https://www.reviewpartydotcom.com/!

Well mutton my chops it's time for another episode of Review Party Dot Com! This show is very funny, very cool, very chill, very nice, very handsome, very party, very dot com! Today's topics include Miami Sound Machine, mediocrity, various kinds of deer calls, grunting, cleaving power, being a human pretzel, the corn pit, MacKenzie Bezos, Professor X's floating bobsled, a little boy in a big shirt...

Are you afraid of the review? After a year of delving the murky depths of internet and finishing them up for this podcast we are terrified of them. We are absolutely squeamish at the thought of what those things are capable of doing to a human psyche. So once again, we are here to present some of the most nightmare inducing internet material you can find, but this week instead of laughing, we’re s...

An encounter surely so exciting you’ll be hearing RPG battle music as soon as you lock eyes with the little bastard. Claws out, it’s time to party. Today’s topics include a go-go extend-o rake, revving up, Bloodborne, getting serious like when Ash puts his hat backwards, going through a lot of duct tape, kind of being in an abyss, cow dental details, speed and power, canned studio laughter on tape...

Imagine buying a Mr. Potato Head and it didn't come with eyes, a mouth, a moustache, a hat; nothing but ears, ears, and ears. You can't return it, you lost the receipt. You can't buy another, you used up all your savings for it. You're stuck with this cruel joke of a toy, little blue plastic ears sticking out every which way. That's what we call Hell, my friends. Today's topics include a digital e...

It's like being raised by feral wolves, then seeing a youtube clip of a scene from the Empire Strikes Back, and then going back to the wilderness. Today's topics include the Backstreet Boy's natural habitat, boyish sin surging forth, Pixar's Coco, Alaskan hockey moms, high cost of living (because of the vampires), intended puns, Foo Fighters Half Time Show, ampersands, fried onions, skull shaped p...

THIS IS MY CORN, THIS IS MY MAZE, YOU'RE IN IT, I OWN YOU, WELCOME TO AUTUMN SUCKER. Today's topics include that green can, tonic, when the petting zoo goes wrong, a festival hero, Buzz Lightyear, dinos getting blasted by meteors, sriracha (it's no big deal!), dangerous raw material: ketchup, a little assortment of ha-ha's, katanas, and the bird-muda triangle. Want more party? Check it out at http...

It's just not going good, okay? We're running low on water, holy AND alkaline, the catapult just isn't launching gored heretics like it used to, my feet hurt, I just don't think we're changing any minds and hearts here! I dunno man, I'm done. Today's topics include stretchy implications, woe, Machop, Machoke, and Machamp, spam spaghetti, this fuckin' snob, Terminator 2 pinball machines, the tooth...

I don’t have hobbies, per se, but I do love to get insanely livid. I just generally enjoy the feeling of my rage boiling over into furious madness. You can tell how good of a weekend I had based on how many new holes there are in my dry wall. What a laugh! Today’s topics include free-spirited shopping at Spirit Halloween, costume wigs, real trench coats, Gulliver’s Travels, a 1995 film staring Ant...