Pure Desire Podcast

Becoming a porn-free person is not an easy journey but is so worth the effort! Matt Dobschuetz knows this first hand. Matt, the host of the Porn Free Radio Podcast and author of the new book  Porn Free , joins us for a crossover episode of the podcast. On today’s episode, we talk to Matt about his new book and the insights he shares about the recovery journey. Matt even asks us a few questions dur...

It’s not enough to just stop our unwanted sexual behaviors. In order to truly break free and heal from the effects of unwanted sexual behaviors, we must find replacement behaviors. Like learning to ride a bike, our mind holds on to repeated behaviors and never lets them go. If we want to stop these automatic behaviors, our brain requires we replace them with new ones. On today’s episode, we discus...

It's the consequences of unwanted sexual behavior that often motivate us most in starting the recovery or healing journey. Whether we’re the struggling spouse or the one betrayed, the crisis and damage of sexual brokenness make the recovery and healing process very necessary. But once we enter this journey, it’s not always rainbows and butterflies. As we grow and develop health, we begin setting b...

Sexual betrayal is one of the most devastating things a person can experience. Though struggling spouses are not primarily out to hurt their husband/wife, sexual brokenness brings immense amounts of pain and trauma into a marriage. As an addict or struggler, is it possible to help our spouse heal from the pain we’ve caused? Is there anything we can do to help in the healing process? On today’s epi...

As followers of Jesus, knowing what is true and biblical is important. But when it comes to battling the effects of unwanted sexual behavior or betrayal trauma we can very easily use spiritual truths to minimize the reality of our situation or struggle. This is referred to as "spiritual bypass." On today's episode, Dr. Craig Cashwell talks to us about spiritual bypass and why it can be so damaging...

Sexual brokenness shatters the lives of so many men and women. We’ve heard this story many times: a man struggles with unwanted sexual behaviors and, because of this, his wife experiences betrayal trauma.  But what happens when the roles are reversed? When a woman struggles and betrays her husband? On today’s episode, Cyndie and Dusty tell us their story of healing. They share how sexual brokennes...

When discovery or disclosure happens, it impacts the mind, body, and soul of a betrayed partner. Our mind becomes stuck on rewind; processing every word of every day, wondering how we missed it. We can’t eat. We can’t sleep. We no longer feel safe. Is there any hope? On today’s episode, we sit down with Jennifer Howie and talk through several aspects of betrayal trauma that will empower a betrayed...

Historically, in many faith communities, there seemed to be a great divide: psychology on one side of the canyon and spirituality on the other side. But now, this gap is closing. On today’s episode, we are privileged to have Dr. Craig Cashwell as our guest. We first met Dr. Cashwell during Module 2 of the  PSAP  training and used this opportunity to dig deeper into what we learned. As a Mental Hea...

When we experience betrayal, it seems as though our world has been turned upside down. This type of trauma can leave us feeling paralyzed and alone, unsure of what’s happening to us and if healing is even possible. On today’s episode, we are honored to have Dr. Barbara Steffens as our guest. She is the author of Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and Heal and the founding Preside...

Creating emotional and sexual intimacy in marriage can be challenging. This is especially true when sexual brokenness is present in a marriage. Today, Dr. Juli Slattery joins us to talk through barriers couples face when creating sexual intimacy and how we can overcome them. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) AUTHENTIC INTIMACY WEBSITE FIND THE HERO IN YOUR HUSBAND: REVISITED (JULI’S BOOK) JAV...

As the COVID spike has caused issues with our regularly scheduled podcasts, we thought we would re-release an oldie but goodie episode. Back in December of 2017, we did an interview with Rodney Wright about the hurdles many churches face when it comes to addressing the effects of sexual brokenness. Even though we’re now 4 years later, this episode still rings so true. As the church, we need to con...

This week's episode is unique. Like so many, COVID has finally visited Nick and Trevor's family. As a pivot, we decided to feature a really powerful message from the 2021 Pure Desire Summit from Rodney Wright. Rodney's message is titled Bold Intimacy. RESOURCES 2022 PURE DESIRE SUMMIT (REGISTER) 2021 PURE DESIRE SUMMIT (PURCHASE LIFETIME ACCESS) GET STARTED Summit 2026!: Register Now Free eBook: 7...

The journey of recovery is a difficult one. While in the recovery journey, it's easy to get discouraged by the process and how long it takes. On today's episode, we identify the five stages of recovery, how long they take, and how these stages help us see the true goal of recovery. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) SEVEN PILLARS OF FREEDOM (RECOVERY RESOURCE FOR MEN) BETRAYAL & BEYOND (BETRAY...

The year 2021 sort of felt like 2020 part 2. Would you agree? With all the challenging elements of the last year, we need to take a look at the year we just had. Lots of changes (good and bad) can cause stress, anxiety, and, oftentimes, backsliding in our healing journey. On today’s episode, we wrap up 2021 for podcasts. We end the year by talking through some of the highs and lows of 2021, what w...

The Christmas season can be challenging on the recovery and healing journey. This is because Christmas has some good and some bad. Good: spending uplifting time with family and friends, focused on giving gifts. Bad: spending draining amounts of time with a lack of boundaries and spiked anxiety. On today’s episode, we talk through how to manage ourselves and remain healthy during the Christmas seas...

Whether it’s with sexual brokenness or betrayal trauma, watching our loved ones battle with it is miserable. For those of us who’ve experienced healing and freedom from our own brokenness or trauma, we know the path of healing well. This makes it so much harder to watch our friends and family have their lives destroyed. This leaves many of us asking: “Is there anything I can do?” Today we answer t...

Trevor Winsor is the host of our podcast and today we turn the tables on him. Today, he's our guest and we ask him to share his story of healing. What started as looking for ways to help his students, Trevor stumbled into his own recovery journey. Today, he recounts his recovery journey from wounded and broken to helping others find hope and healing. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) GET STAR...

Trauma is something we've all faced in life. And trauma comes in a few different variations. Whether it's big traumatic events that rock our world or smaller traumatic events that happen over a long period of time, trauma impacts our lives at a very deep level. On today's episode, we look at the different types of trauma we can experience in life and how to bring healing to each of them. RESOURCES...

Relapse is never something we desire on the recovery journey. But a relapse is one of the best times to evaluate needed steps for sobriety. In today's episode, we look at a tool called the Crash Site Analysis. This tool helps us evaluate our recent relapse and identify the necessary steps for creating sobriety. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) PURE DESIRE GROUPS PURE DESIRE ONLINE GROUPS FAS...

Sobriety and sexual health require a lot of self-awareness. If we want to break free from unwanted sexual behaviors, we have to be aware of our pattern of relapse. On today's episode, we talk about a tool called the Matrix of Addiction. This tool helps us identify our relapse pattern and begin creating sobriety. RESOURCES FULL EPISODE VIDEO (YOUTUBE) GET STARTED Summit 2026!: Register Now Free eBo...

Sex is one of the biggest areas of a relationship or individual's life that is impacted by sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. Today, we field listener questions on the topic of sex. We cover things like fantasies, fetishes, low-sex drive, sexual anorexia, and more. Submit your questions for future FAQ episodes: Email your question to:  podcast@puredesire.org Message/DM us with your questions RE...

Nick and Michelle looked like they had it all. A good marriage, growing ministry, and a beautiful family. But in secret, Nick's sexual addiction was killing it all from the inside. Though he was a respected pastor, hated his behavior, and confessed often, Nick couldn't break free. This left Michelle at the point of wanting to leave. But that's not how the story ends. Over the past 10 years, their...

Experiencing sexual betrayal is unique. Finding out your spouse has been unfaithful or sexually acting out outside your marriage bed is soul-crushing. Is there hope for those experiencing betrayal trauma? We have Dr. Stefanie Carnes, President of the International Institute for Trauma & Addiction Professionals , on the podcast today to give us guidance for conquering betrayal in a marriage/relatio...

The Enneagram is a personality tool with many helpful aspects. Today, continue our conversation with Jeff and Beth McCord, authors and founders of Your Enneagram Coach, about how the Enneagram can be a helpful tool in recovery from sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. Today's episode is part 2 of our 2-part interview with the McCord's where we explore how the Enneagram can integrate into our heal...

The Enneagram is a personality tool with many helpful aspects. Today, we talk to Jeff and Beth McCord, authors and founders of Your Enneagram Coach, about how the Enneagram can be a helpful tool in recovery from sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. Today's episode is part 1 of our 2-part interview with the McCord's where we explore how the Enneagram can integrate in our healing and recovery. RESO...