More than Roommates

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss a frequently asked question about orgasms—for him, for her, and the elusive unicorn of mutual orgasm. We also discuss some common differences between the male and female orgasm.    Questions to Discuss: Have you and your spouse discussed your expectations about how to please each other? How can you take one step to he...

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss a frequently asked question— how followers of Christ should think about and make decisions about birth control. What does the Bible say and how Christians should think about birth control.   Scriptures: Psalm 127:3 Romans 12:2 1 Cor 6:19-20   Questions to Discuss: Have you and your spouse discussed your views about bi...

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss some common myths and stereotypes about sex drive, desire, and frequency and some potential differences between men and women.    Questions to Discuss: What’s the biggest challenge you face in your marriage related to sex drive, desire, and frequency? Have a conversation with your spouse about the topics raised in thi...

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss common challenges couples face with sexual intimacy. These challenges (such as past abuse and trauma, physical pain, guilt and shame) are more common than we might realize, and if you’re struggling, you are not alone!   Scriptures: Romans 8:1 Genesis 3 2 Cor 5:17   Questions to Discuss: What’s been the biggest challen...

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss how sex changes in different seasons of marriage – newlyweds, with a newborn, with kids in the house, empty nest, and everything in between.   Scriptures: 1 Peter 3:7 Genesis 2:25 Song of Solomon   Questions to Discuss: How can you best serve each other in marriage and sexual intimacy in your current season of marriag...

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss whether or not it’s within bounds to “have a quickie.” We discuss different ways to think about sex depending on your schedule and margin, and how to have a healthy rhythm of intimacy.    Questions to Discuss: 1. Are you and your spouse on the same page when it comes to quickies? 2. How can you make space for more ext...

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss specific questions of what’s in and out of bounds in the bedroom. What does the Bible say about specific questions such as pornography, masturbation, positions, oral sex, and so much more.    Scriptures: Hebrews 13:4 1 Cor 6:18 Ephesians 5:3 MT 5:27-28 1 Cor 10:31   Questions to Discuss: 1. What are some ways you can...

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss some general principles of what’s in bounds and out of bounds in the bedroom. Sex cannot involve others besides your spouse (Matthew 5:27-28), cannot involve willingly hurting your spouse against their will (Philippians 2:3-4), and cannot violate your or your spouse’s conscience (Romans 14). Come back tomorrow as we g...

Let's talk about Sex! In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss the importance of talking about sexual intimacy in marriage and why couples often struggle to discuss sex. Part of the reason why so many couples struggle in their sex life is because they don’t talk about it.   Scriptures: Genesis 2:25 Ephesians 4:29   Questions to Discuss: How do you and your s...

In this mini episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott kick-off a series of “quickies” about sex and the most frequently asked questions about marital sex and intimacy. In this first episode we discuss a Christian, biblical theology of sex—we want to help you think rightly about the gift of sex.   Scriptures: Song of Solomon 1:2, 5:1 1 Corinthians 10:31 Phil 2:3-4 Genesis 2:24-25...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss how you can fight FOR (not against) your spouse. What does it look like to stand up for and defend them when they face unjustified criticism from someone else (i.e., parents, children, friends)? Scriptures: Genesis 2:24-25 Romans 12:19 Matthew 5:38-40 PR 26:4-5 MT 18:15-17 Hebrews 3:13 Questions to Discuss: Do you have any...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek and Scott interview Layton & Chelsea Boeve from the Liberator Podcast as they share their story about pornography and how it’s affected their marriage. Layton and Chelsea share how their story has not become their ministry as they seek to help couples with similar stories.   Scriptures: 1 Corinthians 6:18 2 Timothy 1:7 Psalm 139:23-24   Resources: Podc...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek and Scott interview Nick Stumbo, the Executive Director of Pure Desire Ministries, about pornography and its impact on the brain and how it affects marriages. This episode is Part 1 in a 2-part series about pornography and marriage. Scriptures: James 5:16 1 Cor 6:18 Resources: Website - Pure Desire Ministries Free Downloads - 7 Keys to Understanding Be...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss the five love languages (as written by Dr. Gary Chapman) and how knowing our love languages allows us to better speak the love language of our spouse. When we know their love language, it gives us an opportunity serve our spouse in a way that honors them.   Scriptures: 1 Peter 3:7 Phil 2:3-4   Resources: Book –  The 5 Love...

Happy New Year! In this brief episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott briefly reflect on the last 12 months as we look backward on 2024 and forward to 2025 with gratitude.   Questions to Discuss: What are you most grateful for from the past 12 months? What are you most looking forward to in 2025? How can you and your spouse cultivate a habit of gratitude for your lives and marr...

Merry Christmas Eve from the More Than Roommates team! In this brief Christmas Eve reflection, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss our true hope and where hope is found on Christmas Day and every day! Scriptures: Proverbs 13:12 Romans 15:13 Questions to Discuss: What’s your favorite Christmas gift you’ve ever received? What are you hopeful for this Christmas? What’s your greatest hope that God wou...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott interview Greg and Erin Smalley about conflict and the myth that an absence of conflict means a couple must be healthy. We discuss what the Bible says about conflict and how healthy conflict repair can help us to be fully known and fully loved. Questions to Discuss: 1. Do you believe that quarrels and conflict can help couples tru...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss the reactive cycle couples often get into with each other when their expectations aren’t met. We often fall into harmful patterns that can lead us to negative reactions in our marriage. What is this cycle and how do we get out of it? Scriptures: PR 15:1 Rom 12:2 Phil 4:8 Resources: Hope Restored Marriage Intensive (from Fo...

It only comes one time every year, but it’s worth celebrating! In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss how to celebrate your wedding anniversary in a memorable and significant way. Resources: Blog Post – 30 Unique Ways to Celebrate Your Anniversary Scripture: Ephesians 5:31-32 1 Peter 3:7 Questions to Discuss: 1. What’s your favorite party you’ve ever been to? 2...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott talk about what it means to overlook a small offense in marriage. When is it okay to overlook it and when do you need to address and discuss it? Scriptures: Proverbs 19:11 Romans 12:18 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Resources: Harris Creek Conflict: Field Guide Harris Creek Peacemaker Guide More Than Roommates – Episode 44 – What To Do When...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Gabrielle and Scott interview Kyler and Britt Nixon about mutual respect in marriage. The Nixons primarily work with young couples, but this message is relevant for every couple. The Nixons provide practical ways to provide mutual respect in your marriage.   Scriptures: Ephesians 5:33 Ecclesiastes 4:12 Romans 12:10 MT 7:12 Resources: Follow  Love Your First...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discussing holidays, especially related to expectations around family and in-laws. How can you proactively address some of the challenges couples often face around holiday expectations? Scriptures: James 4:1 Matthew 7:12 Phil 2:3-4 Galatians 1:10 Questions to Discuss: 1. What’s your favorite Holiday movie? Is Home Alone a Christma...

Live from the 2024 More Than Roommates Marriage Conference! In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott respond to a testimony of infidelity shared live at the 2024 More Than Roommates Marriage Conference. We share some lessons learned on how to protect our marriages. Registration is now open for the 2025 More Than Roommates Marriage Conference! Find out more at  harriscree...

In this episode of More Than Roommates, we get to hear a testimony from Kevin & Kelli Mainz and their story of infidelity and recovery. While you may not have the same testimony as Kevin & Kelli, you can still learn from their mistakes and be encouraged by God’s faithfulness in their story. Registration is now open for the 2025 More Than Roommates Marriage Conference! Find out more at harriscreek....

We are so excited about the 2025 More Than Roommates Marriage Conference on January 31-February 1, 2025 at Harris Creek! We'll have great teaching, breakouts, fun, and surprises as we seek to help couples take the next intentional step to become so much more than just roommates. We hope to see you there! You can find all the details about the conference and sign-up to join us right here. We sold o...