The Communication Coach

Let's Talk About........With Nicky Perfect

Education EN ↓ 134 episodes

For over a decade, Nicky Perfect BEM served as a Hostage and Crisis Negotiator, working with people and families in moments of extreme crisis. She went on to become Course Director for the UK’s National Negotiation Course and has trained negotiators and leaders across the world. Alongside her operational career, Nicky has studied psychology, relationships, human behaviour, personal development, and coaching. In this podcast, she brings those experiences together to show how the principles of hostage and crisis negotiation can transform everyday communication. Because communication is at the he...

Be sure to visit the podcast's website and support the creator: www.thecommunicationcoach.co.uk

Author

The Communication Coach

Episodes

Episode 57 - How to negotiate with your kids part 2 14.08.2019 14:59

In this episode Nicky discusses why managing expectations with your children helps you to get them to do a task you would like them to do but without the emotional conversation which often goes with it. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.c...

Episode 56 - How to speak to someone in crisis 24.07.2019 41:21

In this episode Nicky gives you 5 ways of how to have a conversation with someone in crisis. This episode is specifically for those people in an emotional relationship with someone else and how this can impact on our ability to be rational and how our belief systems can take over the conversation. she also shares her experience of negotiations and what she learnt from each one. Resources & sup...

Episode 55 - Your lens, my lens 15.07.2019 18:34

We generally view the world through our own lens and what we believe to be true, when this happens we sometimes don't appreciate the other person is also viewing the world through their lens. This can cause conflict or misunderstandings. Once you are aware of how you view different situations then you can change how you communicate. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7...

Episode 54 - How to have a difficult conversation 23.06.2019 20:03

It can sometimes be difficult to have a conversation where you are going to tell someone how you feel. We often play the scenario round in our head and build it up. In this episode Nicky shows you how to approach having a a difficult conversation and ways of structuring taking ownership and control. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRU...

Episode 53- Why clarity in conversation is so important 27.05.2019 14:24

In this weeks episode Nicky discusses how misunderstandings in conversations can lead to ill feeling, relationship breakdown and possibly even caused the death of Thomas Beckett!! She also shows you ways of checking to make sure you understand the message someone gives to you and also how to check someone has received the message you meant to send. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123...

Episode 52- The passing of a friend and 3 lessons I have learnt 14.05.2019 22:44

In this episode Nicky shares an experience of losing a friend this week and three lessons she has learnt. Each lesson is based on communicating with others, building relationships and dealing with loss and challenges. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www...

Episode 51- Why trust matters 24.04.2019 26:33

In this episode Nicky discusses why trust is so important and how to gain trust. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.u k

Episode 50- The power of honest conversations 07.04.2019 28:23

In this episode Nicky describes how honest conversations are the root of strong relationships. she describes the three character traits of conflict, submissive, assertive and aggressive and how these impact on relationships. She also shows you how to have honest conversations, taking responsibility for your own feelings and phrasing these into a conversation. Resources & support (UK) Samaritan...

Episode 49- 3 Lessons I have learnt from the younger generation 17.03.2019 20:20

In this episode Nicky discusses what she has learnt from three conversations with younger people this week and how making assumptions reflects in how we communicate with others. She also explains what mirroring really is and how you can use this in every day communication to get the most from another person. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/...

Episode 48- How to stop your emotional brain taking over 04.03.2019 25:20

Episode 48- How to stop your emotional brain taking over by The Communication Coach Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.u k

Episode 47- How saying the right thing isn't always the right thing to say 13.02.2019 16:08

In this episode Nicky explains why saying what you believe is the right thing might not be the right thing. Have you ever had an emotional response when you have tried to solve someones problems or offer advice? Here are some reasons why this might be happening. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 414...

Episode 46 - How to improve your life and the lives of others by the words you use 30.01.2019 18:15

In this episode Nicky talks about how you can improve your life by listening and being aware of want you are saying. She also explains how talking negatively about yourself and others has a greater impact than you might realise and how you can change this to improve your life. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s...

Episode 45 - Good communication starts with you 17.01.2019 18:46

In this episode Nicky follows on with how to improve your communication skills and how it starts with you. She explains why having a greater understanding of yourself help you to work out what triggers your emotions and how to change the way you talk. She specifically focusses on how we love to blame others and its not until we take responsibility for our own actions that we can then make a change...

Episode 44 - New year, new communication? 09.01.2019 16:00

In this episode Nicky looks at new goals set for the year and is communication one of them? She also discusses how we can improve our own communication but it starts with how we view ourselves and what we learn. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nicky...

Episode 43 - What to do when when you have lost your purpose 12.12.2018 16:00

In this episode Nicky shares a change sh experienced, how she lost her purpose and the effect it had on her behaviour and conversations. She also shares a way to help if you feel the same Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.th...

Episode 42 - How do you behave when your ego kicks in? 29.11.2018 16:00

In this episode Nicky discusses what ego is and how it reflects in your behaviour and communication. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.u k

Episode 41 - Do you listen to be right? 21.11.2018 16:44

In this episode Nicky discusses how and why we listen to be right and the impact this has on our conversations. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.u k

Episode 40 - 4 ways to overcome fear 14.11.2018 16:32

In this episode Nicky explains why we feel fear and 4 ways you can overcome your own fears and achieve what you want to achieve or overcome challenges you might be facing. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationco...

Episode 39 - Words are sometimes not enough 08.11.2018 16:17

In this episode Nicky describes how sometimes words aren't enough and not actually needed by the other person. We often feel the need to speak and problem solve when actually all we need is to just be there. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nick...

Episode 38 - A trip to the hairdresser and what I learnt 30.10.2018 16:52

In this track Nicky explains how a visit to a hairdressers is often more about a person spending sometime on themselves and being listened to than just a haircut Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.u k

Episode 37 - We are what we believe we are 24.10.2018 16:46

In this episode Nicky discusses the phrase "we are what we believe we are" and how, she believes, this impacts on our words and behaviour. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.u k

Episode 36 - The impact of social media on conversations 16.10.2018 17:57

In this episode Nicky discusses her belief on how social media impacts our conversations and 3 ways you can look at avoiding an argument when you disagree with someone or believe you are being attacked by another person's comments. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools &amp...

Episode 35 - Courageous Conversations 10.10.2018 16:40

In this episode Nicky discusses why it's difficult for us to have courageous conversation but how powerful they are when we do. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.thecommunicationcoach.co.u k

Episode 34 - How to stop your emotions taking over your conversation 03.10.2018 17:44

Sometimes we know we shouldn't respond from an emotional point of view but how do we stop ourselves from doing this? In this episode Nicky shows you 3 ways of dealing with question. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore more tools & training: 🌐 www.nickyperfect.com 🌐 www.the...

Episode 33 - What happens when we feel out of control 24.09.2018 19:04

In this episode Nicky discusses what happens when we feel we have no control and how this changes the way we communicate with others. Being out of control is often triggered by a fear we might have and we are looking for a way to protect ourselves. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141 Explore mor...