Let's Talk About........With Nicky Perfect

In this episode Nicky looks at how we can negotiate with our kids especially in during lockdown. She gives 3 tips; remember our conversation comes from our own point of view, being present, listening. She also shares the plane Please Listen by Leo Buscaglia Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141  Ex...

As we enter the second month of this current lockdown, relationships are beginning to breakdown as people struggle with home schooling and working from home. Families have forgotten to make quality and fun time for each other as this way of life becomes the new normal. In this episode Nicky gives us four tips on how to communicate with our families during lockdown. Resources & support (UK) Sam...

Part 5 of this mini course where Nicky gets you to reflect on how you communicate. Listening is at the heart of building relationships, being fully present with someone with no judgement or trying to problem solve is incredibly powerful when it comes to building relationships and gaining trust. Without trust relationships fail, without listening and spending time with someone it's hard to bui...

In this episode we look at the think, feel, do cognitive behaviour model and how this affects the way we behave and communicate with each other. Nicky shares some of her own stories in how this works for her and how reflection is the key to change. Sometimes we don't know what we don't know, understanding how we work as individuals helps us to be able to change and grow. Resources &...

In this episode Nicky looks at how fear drives us and causes emotional conversations rather than logical ones. She discusses how your inner critic is there to protect you and comes from the part of the primitive brain which causes fight, flight or freeze. Nicky also discusses how being control can have an affect on how we communicate with others and when control is taken from us it causes fear. Th...

This episode is part 2 from a 5 part mini series about self reflection and how to build relationships through communication. In this episode we loo at our own values and belief and what we believe to be true and how it drives our behaviour. Nicky gives you a challenge at the end of each session to help you become more reflective and consciously aware about how you communicate with other people. Re...

This mini series is a 5 day course where Nicky helps you to become more self aware about how you behave and why. Today is all about self reflection and the challenge is to make your behaviour and communication more conscious. It is difficult to change if you are unaware of how you behave int he first place. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7...

Welcome to our conversations from the coffee shop where we meet and talk to people about their lives and their stories. In this episode we meet Jess who shares her story of how she lost her partner to heart disease at an incredibly early age, how she dealt with this by in her words "running away" and how she fell into an abusive relationship and eventually escaped. Jess shares with us th...

In this episode we look at one of the ways we listen to other people, the "problem solving" way. This means we focus on how we can solve the other persons problem rather than how they might be feeling, or what might be going on for them. We also discuss the poem Please Listen by Leo Buscaglia. Leo's poem shows the effect telling someone what to do can have on them. Resources & s...

In this track Nicky speaks to Susie. Susie is 16 and has struggled with her mental health. Susie tried to take her own life and was sectioned under the mental health act when she was 13 years old. Here she tells her story of her experience and how she is now paying it forward working with mental health organisations to help other people who might find themselves in a similar situation. A must list...

In this episode Nicky explains how validating how someone is feeling helps to build relationships and creates trust. This can be in a new relationship or with a family member. Sometimes we are quick to give advice or solve the problem for the other person rather than listening to what they are saying and how are they are feeling. Recognising how a person might feel helps them to feel listened to a...

In this episode Nicky shares a recent car accident and how her emotional or limbic brain took over and how she managed to interrupt her thought patterns to gain control. She also shows how this can happen when we have arguments or react to something maybe one of our kids or partners have done and how this causes a breakdown in the relationship. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (fre...

In this track Nicky shares why we talk about people behind their back, what drives us to this and what we can do to think about changing our behaviour. We've all done it been unkind about someone or moaned about them behind their back, we sometimes seem to thrive on belittling others but why? Sometimes the smallest change makes the biggest difference. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans:...

In this track /nicky discusses how to make a great first impression and gives you four tips. She shares her stories from her negotiation world and being a step parent and makes this relatable to building any sort of relationship from a job interview, first date or becoming a step parent. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK...

In this episode Nicky shares a story where she has been working under stress and how this has impacted the way she listened to her team and also communicated with them. In this episode you will learn:How to become more self aware so you recognise what your behaviour is. What to do if you find yourself caught up in the moment. What to do next. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free,...

In this episode Nicky shares one of her negotiations with a young girl in a tree with a noose round her neck. She talks about the lessons she learnt, what worked and how she uses this experience in communicating with her teenage daughter. Nicky also share her experiences in lockdown and gives you some tips on how to communicate with family during this challenging time. Resources & support (UK)...

For over a decade Nicky had the privilege of being an international hostage and crisis negotiator. During this time she learnt everyone has a story and all of us experience some sort of crisis during our own lives. Each one of our stories has a life lesson someone else can learn from. Today's story is about loss, dealing with grief and how being present and in a moment with another person can...

In this episode Nicky share her knowledge of how hostage have survived their time in captivity and what we can learn and use as we experience these challenging times. She also shares stories from her own life and how you can use these to create better relationships as we spend far more time with each other and change our daily routines. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7)...

In this track Nicky explains why she believes words are important and then gives three ways of improving and challenging yourself in your own conversation. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141  Explore more tools & training:  🌐 www.nickyperfect.com  🌐   www.thecommunicationcoach.co.u k

In this episode Nicky discusses what she believes presence is, the difference it makes when you bring you own presence to ta conversation and she also shares a chapter from her new book, talking about what happened and the lessons she learnt. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141  Explore more tool...

Not everyone enjoys Christmas and sometimes we have to face challenges which seem exaggerated because of the time of year. In this episode Nicky shares some practical tips on dealing with our own emotions and also why there is conflict between people when deciding how to spend Christmas Day. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELI...

In this track Nicky describes a conversation she had with a team member, how it didn't go too well and what she learned. she also shares the stages of change and how to talk to people on a one to one basis. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141  Explore more tools & training:  🌐 www.nicky...

In this episode Nicky looks at one of the episodes from The Peaky Blinders series here in the UK and how one of the main characters is able to influence his sister into getting what he wants. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141  Explore more tools & training:  🌐 www.nickyperfect.com  🌐   ww...

In this episode Nicky explores how telling a team member they must do something because the organisation or business demands it can leave the person feeling devalued. When this happens they become less motivated and engaged and you lose their interest and good will. Spending time in the moment listening to them and then working out a solution which is still best for the business or organisation is...

Every day we can learn from our conversations with others. In this episode Nicky describes a simple encounter with a customer, how the conversation didn't go quite according to plan and what she learnt. Resources & support (UK) Samaritans: 116 123 (free, 24/7) Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7) PAPYRUS HOPELINEUK (under 35s): 0800 068 4141  Explore more tools & training:  🌐 www.nickyperf...