Let's Talk About Love, Sex & Infidelity

What if the thing you've been doing to fix your relationship is actually what's keeping it stuck? Most couples hit a wall. You've read the books, planned the date nights, promised to listen better — and somehow you're still in the same spot. More exhausted, more frustrated, and further apart than before. If that sounds familiar, this episode is for you. In this solo episode, To...

What if the thing getting in the way of your sex life isn't a physical problem — it's a protective one? In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager takes a candid, grounded look at what happens when your inner critic shows up in the bedroom. Whether it sounds like Am I good enough? Is my partner enjoying this? or it shows up as numbness, avoidance, or a tota...

Is jealousy making you feel out of control — or controlling? Before you try to talk yourself out of it, it's worth understanding what it's actually doing for you. In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager takes an honest, compassionate look at jealousy — not as a character flaw or a red flag, but as a protective response rooted in older, unhealed pain. If...

Do you go blank, get quiet, or feel like you've completely left your body the moment conflict shows up in your relationship? There's a reason that happens — and it has nothing to do with not caring. In this solo episode, Todd digs into one of the most misunderstood patterns in long-term relationships: shutting down during conflict. Whether you go still and silent or reach for your phone,...

What does cheating actually do to the person doing it? Most conversations about infidelity focus on the betrayed partner — and for good reason. But in this episode, Todd Creager turns the lens inward, looking at what happens inside the body and mind of the person having the affair. It's part of his ongoing series on how cheating cheats the cheater, and this episode zeroes in on something rare...

Have you ever wondered why someone who's having an affair can still feel profoundly alone? In this episode, Todd Creager continues his series on how cheating cheats the cheater — and this time he looks at one of the deepest costs of infidelity: the loss of authentic intimacy. Using the Internal Family Systems (IFS) framework, Todd explains why keeping a secret doesn't just strain a relat...

What if the person most harmed by an affair isn't the one who was betrayed — but the one who did the betraying? In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager returns to one of his most talked-about topics: the psychological cost of infidelity to the person who cheats. Drawing on over 30 years of working with couples, and through the lens of Internal Family Systems...

What happens between you and your partner in bed may have less to do with technique and more to do with how you're wired for connection. In this solo episode, Todd Creager — licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 30 years of experience working with couples — breaks down the four attachment styles and what they look like during sex and physical intimacy. Most people have heard of the...

What if the part of you that shuts down sexually — or the part that keeps reaching for porn — isn't a character flaw? What if it's trying to protect you? In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager explains why forcing your way through sexual performance anxiety — or trying to stop compulsive sexual behavior through sheer willpower — almost always backfires....

If you've discovered a partner's affair and wondered why the pain feels like it might actually kill you, you're not overreacting. In this episode, Todd explains exactly why betrayal trauma hits so deep — and what healing actually looks like. When an affair comes to light, the shock is real and the cause is clear. But what makes it feel so all-consuming is that it often wakes up some...

Do you and your partner keep circling the same argument, no matter how many times you've tried to resolve it? The problem might not be what either of you is saying — it might be who is actually doing the talking. In this solo episode, licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Todd Creager introduces a concept from Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy that helps explain why so many couples get s...

After discovering a partner's affair, many people ask the same question: Am I going crazy?   You love this person deeply — and part of you wants to walk out the door. That contradiction isn't a sign something is wrong with you. It's what happens when betrayal creates an internal war between competing parts of who you are. In this solo episode, Todd Creager breaks down what he calls...

What draws someone back to a relationship they know is hurting them — and what does it take to finally walk away? In this episode, Todd sits down with author and spiritual counselor Stephen Paul Edwards, whose memoir The Venus Fly Trap chronicles one of the most intense, chaotic, and revealing relationships of his life. Named by the woman at the center of it all, the title says everything — and no...

What if the "insecurity" you've been working so hard to reassure isn't insecurity at all? In this solo episode, Todd Creager—a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 30 years of experience—walks you through one of the most confusing dynamics he sees in his practice: when what looks like a partner's fear and need for reassurance is actually a pattern of manipulati...

You know they lied. You've seen the evidence. So why can't you just move on? In this episode, Todd addresses one of the most painful experiences in relationships: loving someone who has betrayed your trust through infidelity or other serious lies. Drawing from real cases in his practice, he explains the psychological phenomenon of cognitive dissonance—when your reality of love and commit...

Have you ever felt like something's off in your relationship, but your partner keeps telling you you're the problem? That knot in your stomach, that nagging sense that things aren't right—what if it's not your imagination? In this episode, Todd addresses gaslighting—a pattern where one partner makes the other doubt their own reality. Sometimes it's calculated, sometimes it...

Have you noticed your partner acting differently but they tell you you're imagining things? You might be dealing with something more than just infidelity. In this episode, Todd talks about what happens when someone who's cheated uses gaslighting to avoid taking responsibility. He walks through the specific tactics unfaithful partners use—from denying obvious behavior changes to minimizin...

What happens when you shut down during a fight with your partner—when your chest tightens, your voice vanishes, and you feel small like a scolded child? Todd explains why some people collapse during conflict while others lash out. It's not about caring less—it's about caring so much that your nervous system shuts down from shame. When shame takes over, you disappear emotionally. Your par...

What happens when the person you love most goes quiet—not yelling, not fighting, just... gone? In this episode, Todd Creager addresses one of the most painful patterns in relationships: silent punishment. It's not always intentional. You've been hurt, so you pull back. You turn away. You go cold. It feels like self-protection, but to your partner, it feels like rejection. Todd shares the...

What happens when you freeze up during a difficult conversation with your partner—when your mind goes blank, your voice disappears, and you can't find the words? Todd explains why shutting down isn't a weakness. It's your nervous system trying to protect you from emotional overwhelm. In this episode, Todd breaks down the freeze response and why it happens. When your body shuts down,...

Does every conversation with your partner turn into a back-and-forth where nobody feels heard? You're not alone—and you're probably not doing anything wrong. You just care deeply about being understood. In this episode, Todd breaks down why defensiveness shows up in relationships and what it's actually doing to your connection. When you defend yourself, even with good intentions, yo...

In this episode, relationship expert Todd Creager shares the real story of Sam and Barbara—a couple who came to him with "communication problems." But what they actually had was something deeper: a years-long Cold War fueled by the need to be right. After four decades of working with couples, I can tell you this pattern shows up everywhere. Smart, successful people who've built thei...

Here's a podcast episode description optimized for podcast platforms and Todd's brand voice: Episode Title: How to Stop Bickering: The Real Problem Isn't Communication Short Description (for podcast apps that limit characters): Constant bickering isn't a communication problem—it's a nervous system problem. After 20+ years working with couples, I share why "just commun...

In this revealing episode, relationship expert Todd Creager tackles the profound identity crisis that occurs when infidelity is discovered. If you've betrayed your partner, you're not just facing relationship damage—you're confronting fundamental questions about who you are. Todd guides listeners through five essential questions for identity rebuilding: Who am I now that I've b...

If you've been unfaithful to your partner, you're probably drowning in one question: "Why did I do this?" And if you're the betrayed partner, you desperately need to understand: "How could they do this to me?" In this episode, I'm talking directly to people who've cheated—though I want betrayed partners to listen too. Because understanding what drives i...